Word Count: 402
Date: 02/01/05
Series: One
Rating: T
Category: Character
Pairing/Focus: Sharon, Helo
Warnings:
Summary: Angst/Drama
Spoilers/Disclaimers: Don’t own ‘em, only wish I did.
Her heart jumps in her chest, a rapid but precise rhythm that changes in proportion to the exertion applied to it. Sharon knows the exact formula that can be used to calculate it but she tries not to because it reminds her of who she isn’t. It means the heart inside her chest, the one that stretches and strains to pump her blood, was crafted by cold metal hands and synthesized muscle. She flexes her hand and watches the sluggish movement of blood through the dark blue veins in her hands. It amazes her how complicated her body is, how fragile humans really are.
She sighs, her breath whispering out between her teeth and she can taste the sourness on her tongue. It’s a sharp taste of realism and she understands just how good of a job the Cylons have done with them. Perfection has its price she thinks as Helo wakes a few feet behind her.
“Sharon.” She turns, his voice coming from the darkness. “What’s wrong?” He asks, the softness drawing her around to face him.
There are so many answers to that and Sharon doesn’t know what to do with the feeling of guilt that’s welled up within her where only cold silence was before. There isn’t a program for this, she isn’t supposed to feel but she does and she can’t decide if it’s hope or despair that blossoms in her chest because of that.
Helo lifts the blankets in the wake of her silence, an unspoken invitation that she takes. His arm rests comfortably over the curve of her hip and his breath tickles the back of her neck. Her body settles into his, melding into the bow of his spine, and there is hope in her when she realizes it’s not because she’s programmed that way. He makes her feel human, makes her want and despair and need. The heart in her chest jumps at this realization and it moves without rhythm and reason.
Human is a state of being she decides. She can’t change what she’s made of, how she was born but she can change her soul, her heart. She changes it for Helo, for a love that blossoms, warm and wanting in her chest. “I love you,” she tells him and for the first time it has meaning.