Generations Redefined (part 2)

By Crystal Wimmer

Word Count:46,322
Date:10/29/04
Series: One
Rating: T
Category: Relationships
Pairing/Focus: Lee, Kara
Warnings:
Summary:
Spoilers/Disclaimers:

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He was warm. Why this was significant, he couldn’t have said, but it was the predominant sensation he was feeling. Warmth. Blessed, wonderful, reassuring warmth that kept the ice at bay.

Ice. Cold.

With a jolt, Lee awoke to find himself slightly bound by numerous blankets and a mask over his face. He jerked slightly, head thrashing to the side, and not recognizing initially what was wrong and then panicking when he did.

“Easy, Son.” The voice was deep, solid, and familiar. It offered comfort as nothing else could have; not even the warmth of the woman he’d become accustomed to in the suffocating, freezing ship. Still, panic aside, the voice of his father reached the child within him and kept him calm, or at the very least coherent.

“Kara?”

“She’s right here,” his father answered, stepping back to allow him to see the cot next to him and the woman lying there. Like him, she had a mask on her face and tubes extending from her blankets. For that matter, so many blankets that only her face visible, barely that with the mask. She looked impossibly pale; almost blue. “She’ll be fine. You both will.”

Lee released a breath, then took another gulp of coveted air. They were here. They had made it. “How…?”

“As soon as we realized that you hadn’t arrived on the Rising Star, we started searching. From what we can tell, an engine blew out and threw you away from the fleet, then you must have continued drifting. By the time we found you, got you secured and back to the Galactica, both of you were unconscious.”

“How long?” he asked on a croak.

“It was two hours before you were reported missing,” Adama said gently. “And nearly ten to find you and get you back home. Doctor Salik has already done scans on the two of you, and he found no damage due to either the cold or the oxygen deprivation. In fact, he said the cold just might be what had kept you alive; your bodies were just this side of hibernating. You used less oxygen, so it lasted until we could get to you.”

“Kara?”

“She’s fine, Son. Sleeping, just like you were. She’ll wake when she’s ready.”

He nodded, his throat too sore to bother with speech for the moment, although he had hundreds of questions forming in his rapidly waking mind. His mouth was dry and cottony, and his head hurt. None of it mattered when compared to the woman next to him. “How long… back?”

“A couple of hours,” Adama answered, his hand remaining on Lee’s shoulder. It had started out there for restraint, but appeared to be remaining to offer comfort. Lee had to wonder who was offering comfort to Kara… who would be there when she woke up in confusion? “We’ll keep you in here until she’s awake,” his father told him with more understanding in his voice than Lee could comprehend. “I won’t make you leave her.”

Lee closed his eyes. Had he been that obvious? He supposed it wasn’t a mystery that the two of them were friends, but if they had been found together… He remembered how they had been sitting, and it took less than that to make rumors go nuts on the Galactica. He didn’t want matters worse rather than better. “Who picked us up?”

“Chief Tyrol took a team out personally. He was so upset that one of his engines, however old, had failed. He made it his responsibility. Lieutenant Gaeta tracked the shuttle, planned out a route, and Tyrol went out to tow you back. We had medical standing ready when they cut the shuttle open. You and she were so still…”

“I fell asleep,” he said softly. “I was just so damned cold.”

“Kara too,” Adama said quietly. “I think hypothermia would have gotten her if you hadn’t been holding her. As it was you were both dangerously cold when they pulled you out. Then again, as the Doctor reminded me, it was a good thing. At regular temperatures, your bodies would have required more oxygen than was available. We could be looking at severe oxygen deprivation and most likely brain damage. With your bodies nearly shut down, there was no damage done.”

“Maybe not physically,” Lee muttered, swallowing again to relieve his dry throat but having little success. “But you try sitting in a pitch black ship with no heat and very little air, especially when you have a friend relying on you. I’ll be a long time before I turn the lights off.”

His father smiled, but Lee wasn’t sure how much of what he was saying was a joke. At the very least Kara had some – if not good memories – experience in dark, closed spaces. Lee hadn’t, and the experience was more than was willing to cope with at the moment. He had never been particularly claustrophobic, even managing the sensory deprivation time at the Academy with no difficulty. But he’d been in no danger then; this time had been different. This time he hadn’t known if he was going to get out or not.

“Why am I tied down?” he asked.

“You aren’t. It’s blankets, mostly; one heating and two normal to retain the heat. The IV has warm fluid as well. You’re still a bit colder than Salik would like, but your temperature is coming up quickly. Kara’s has been normal for a while since she’s smaller than you, but she’s being a little stubborn about waking up. The doc can do it with drugs, but he thinks it’s better if she wakes up on her own so for the time being we wait.”

He turned his head back to the side, watching Kara. She was as still as before; just as pale.

“Dad?”

His father looked down at him eagerly. “What?”

How could he ask this without sounding stupid? It was irrational, and silly, and entirely unpractical. But he needed it, just for the reassurance. “Do these things roll?” He patted the bed he was lying on.

“Where do you want to go?” his father asked, but there wasn’t confusion on his face; just a kind of understanding that Lee didn’t want to analyze.

“If there’s room, can you stick me over there?” He gestured towards Kara’s cot. His father said nothing, but nodded and fiddled with something at the foot of the cot before rolling it over to Kara’s. Lee fished around under his blankets until he could release one hand, then slipped it up under Kara’s blankets. It wasn’t until then that he realized the flight suits were gone, leaving the two of them clad in hospital attire. It didn’t matter though, not with half a dozen blankets between them.

After a moment of reaching and searching, Lee found Kara’s warm hand under the mass of blankets. He traced the fingers to palm, and then moved to her wrist where he found a pulse, strong and steady. Only then did he relax, letting the warmth of the blankets take him back under, dropping him into a healing, restful sleep.

Bill Adama watched his son’s eyes close, and for the first time since he’d awoken the young man looked at peace. Bill couldn’t imagine what it must have been like to huddle in a ship for hours on end, cold and without air, but he didn’t think his son’s words had been a joke. This would affect Lee, and most likely Kara as well.

Lee and Kara. Lords, he had thought that both were gone. During the interminable time while Lieutenant Gaeta had been running active sensors to find them – a reasonable precaution given that they were at war – William had quite literally held his breath. He’d lost Lee once, nearly a second time, and the same could be said for Kara. And yet, until he was faced the prospect of losing both of them at once, he hadn’t really realized what fear could be.

The wait for the ship to be brought back to the Galactica – a tricky procedure at best – had nearly driven him insane. They were in there, and isolated, and yet even with Tyrol’s ship only a few feet away, they were unable to get any life-preserving measures into place. They couldn’t get the ship power, and they couldn’t get its occupants any survival supplies. The situation had been beyond unacceptable; it had been terrifying.

He was a warrior, and had been for most of his life. He’d fought in wars, been injured in battle, and had faced more life and death situations than he cared to remember. Still, facing his own death had been nothing when compared to facing the death of his children. And yes, Kara was as good as his own, even if he’d never told her as much. She might not have become his daughter-in-law officially, but they shared the bond of family just the same.

Bill had been right behind Salik’s crew when they’d entered the ship, something they’d been unable to do in space because there was no docking capability in the old vessel. Having seen the charred outer shell, he had not expected them to be alive. With power all but drained, and oxygen depleted, his prayers had increased. He remembered once watching Kara say grace before a meal, and wondered if she had been praying. He wondered if they’d had the chance, or if the explosion had knocked them both out. He didn’t know which alternative his terrified mind preferred. The thought of them slowly freezing or suffocating wasn’t something he wanted to contemplate, and yet losing them without their being able to even try to save themselves seemed almost worst.

When he’d entered the icy ship behind Salik’s team, William had been struck by the cold, and then as emergency lights had illuminated the cabin his heart had stopped. Two still figures had been huddled against the back wall, unconscious and all but buried in blankets. He had watched Doctor Salik physically pry Lee’s arms from around Kara, and between the blue of their skin and the cold, he had been sure that they were dead. Both of them; his entire family gone.

Thankfully, Salik had jumped to no such conclusions. He’d had their bodies stretched out, uniforms cut off, and warming blankets in place before Bill had been able to get close enough to touch them. That had been a blessing as well, because nearly thirty minutes later he had taken his son’s hand in Life Station and had been shocked at how chilled the skin was even after that length of therapy. Kara had seemed marginally warmer when he’d kissed her forehead above the mask - wishing her a quick recovery - but that might have been because her smaller form had less volume to warm or because he had reached for her head instead of her hand, an area of the body which received significantly more blood flow. William didn’t know – didn’t care – but he wanted to see his son as warm. Warm, awake, and alert.

Now, thankfully, he had seen that. But it didn’t relieve all his worry. Kara was still sleeping, although Salik assured him that it was sleep rather than some form of coma. Her brain activity was normal, as Lee’s had been. And yet a father couldn’t turn off the concern by receiving only a few moments of reprieve. Additionally, there was a certain amount of sting in the fact that Lee’s concern had been for Kara rather than himself, but that was most likely the responsibility that Lee always carried. He habitually worried about others.

Nevertheless, it had been the comfort of Kara’s hand that had allowed the young man to rest, and not his father’s touch. Yes, it was petty and selfish, but it had been a long day. William Adama was hurt by his son responding to a sleeping woman rather than his wide-awake father. Sensible? Of course not, but then familial feelings rarely were.

On the other hand, he was just glad that his son had found comfort somewhere. The fear in Lee’s expression when he had awoken had been almost more than any father could take. The worst of it was that he wasn’t all-powerful anymore, and he wasn’t almighty, as his sons had once believed. Instead, he was at the mercy of uncertain medicine and unpredictable circumstances. The situation was unacceptable; and he couldn’t to a damned thing to change it.

One of the technicians had moved over to Lee, and she made no comment regarding the movement of his cot. Instead, she took a device and ran it over his forehead and then around behind his ear. Looking at the device, she smiled. “Ninety-seven, two,” she stated. “Very close to normal. Has he been awake?”

“For a few minutes,” William answered.

The technician smiled again, then moved around the cots rather than between them to check Kara in the same manner. The smile returned, followed by a quick adjustment to the warmer’s controls.

“How is she?”

“Ninety-nine,” Cassie answered. “I’m lowering the blanket temperature; we dong want to give her a fever.” When he nodded his understanding, Cassie looked up to meet his eyes. “Has she been awake?”

William shook his head, and tried not to take the slight frown too seriously. Lee had woken up when he was ready, and Kara would do the same. It was all a matter of waiting.

But by the next morning, waiting wasn’t what he wanted to do. It had been difficult enough when it had been only himself sitting in Life station to worry, but now with Lee sitting in a chair beside him wrapped in a blanket – this following a scene that William didn’t care to remember about having to remain in bed when he felt fine – William was becoming concerned. Kara was still out, and showing no signs of stirring. He didn’t know what to make of that. Questions directed to the doctor were neatly sidestepped, giving them no answers. The bottom line was that the man didn’t know.

Granted, her temperature had been lower than Lee’s when they’d been found, but it had also come back up more quickly. To William, that would indicate a more rapid recovery, and yet there Kara was, still completely away from them. Lee had gone beyond worried. He wouldn’t leave her bedside, even to eat or sleep himself. Reminders that he had been in a similar state only hours before didn’t make any difference to his son; Lee wasn’t leaving her. William couldn’t fault the young man, because he had felt the same way. Lee was taking her recovery very personally, whether because he had been on command for the mission or for some deeper reason, William couldn’t be sure.

Finally, after nearly thirty-six hours of medical care, the doctor agreed that things were not proceeding as he wanted. William waited with Lee – exhausted beyond words or even coherent thought – while the doctor went to get a medication that would stimulate her body to wake. William had no clue why he was so reluctant to use it, but that seemed to be the problem.

When Salik returned, two technicians accompanying him along with a full life-support cart, William began to get the idea that this was more dangerous than he had considered. His look told the doctor that he was worried, and for a change words didn’t have to be dragged from the physician. “Stimulants are hard on the heart,” he explained briefly. “Especially when a system is already in shock from stress of any kind. The rescue equipment is only a precaution.”

With that, William and Lee were nudged out of the way and two technicians assisted the doctor in administering the medication. The results weren’t dramatic. In fact, William wondered if they had done anything at all. Yet still they waited… and waited. Even with the medication, it appeared that Kara was going to be as stubborn in this as she was in everything else; despite the drug, she wasn’t going to wake up until she was damned good and ready. Glancing at the fear still filling his son’s eyes, William said a quick prayer that she would do so soon… very soon.

Chapter 10

If she’d just move, just… anything.

Lee Adama gave a sigh that was part fatigue and part frustration. Dammit, Kara. Why in hell won’t you just wake up and look at me? Suddenly the sight of hazel eyes seemed to be the most important thing in the world. Living without that now was worse than sitting in the freezing darkness. At least then he’d been able to hold her, feel her heartbeat against him, and he had known that neither of them was alone.

Was she alone, now?

Lords of Kobol, you heard her prayer. Hear mine. Give her back to me. Let me know she’s okay…

It was the same involuntary thought that had skittered through his mind a hundred times in the last twelve hours. That was the time during which he’d been really worried, the time when all their options were exhausted and they could only wait. The stimulant, which had been Salik’s only recourse to her extended unconsciousness, had done nothing. It had put her in danger, yes – but it had done nothing helpful. She was still sleeping, as though it had never been given. Thankfully, it hadn’t produced any side-effects either.

Lee hadn’t really realized just how much life – how much movement and energy – Kara had radiated. He’d always just taken for granted that she lived in fast-forward. Now, seeing her form still, it was like seeing an extension of himself cut off. She was quiet, calm, and deathly still. Granted, her color was better than it had been and the mask was off her face, which helped her to look more like herself, but she was still far too quiet for his liking.

And that was the joke. How many times had he wanted her to just shut up for fifteen seconds? How many times had he wanted her to slow down long enough to think before she reacted? How many times had he sat, just watching, entranced by the constant motion? He would give any of those times just to see the flicker of an eyelid now. He just wanted her to wake up.

The doctor assured him – repeatedly – that she was only sleeping. Salik had no reason to lie, but this didn’t seem like any sleep that Lee had ever seen. She didn’t move, didn’t turn over, and didn’t make a sound. This was yet another unnatural aspect to Kara – the silence. She had always given a smart-ass remark to him or anyone else, and she could argue with anyone - and win - more than half the time. She could definitely scream your ears off when you’d let her. Even in sleep, he knew that she was rarely quiet. He’d passed by her bunk more than once when she was off shift and he was going on, and there was always a snore, a mumble, or a slight hum of sound. She just couldn’t be quiet. Zak had told him once that she didn’t have an off switch. Lee had believed his brother. But at the moment, Kara was definitely not “on.”

He had been awake for three days now, and Kara had yet to flutter an eyelash. Doctor Salik had left her IV in, saying he had to do so until she was able to keep herself hydrated. Lee had been threatened with the return of his own when he’d refused to go to the mess hall to eat, and then had wound up with one anyway when his temperature had begun to rise and his chest tightened. Lee really couldn’t even regret getting sick, because it kept the discussion of whether or not he could remain in Life Station to a minimum. For the time being, the mild case of pneumonia – probably caused by the extended exposure to cold air and reduced oxygen – was enough to grant him IV antibiotics and a pass from work. It wasn’t that he wouldn’t have written himself off the schedule anyway to stay by her side, but this had made it easier to explain.

The only real difficulty he’d run up against had been remaining in the room with her. While they’d both been in less stable condition, they’d been kept in the open bay where medics and doctors were close by to watch. Kara had been moved into her own room the same day that Lee had first lost his IV, and they’d tried to move him into one as well. He had let them, but he hadn’t stayed there. At the time he’d thought he was well, if tired, and didn’t need the bed. Later he’d known that he needed one, but couldn’t find it in him to leave her side. She’d been with him through the worst that life had to offer, and he couldn’t leave her to fight whatever this was – whatever was keeping her from them – alone.

“How is she?”

Lee didn’t bother to look over his shoulder at his father. The man had been a shadow since he’d first woken up in the bay. At that time, Lee had been reassured by the commanding presence. But as his temperature had risen, and Kara’s condition hadn’t changed, his father’s constant presence had become almost a nuisance. “The same,” he finally said, certain that the older man wouldn’t leave until he had his answers.

“And you?”

“The same,” Lee repeated. His temperature was controlled by the medications they’d given him, and the antibiotics would take care of any infection. Breathing was easier, even if he had developed a slight cough.

Slowly, William Adama rounded the bed and took a place on Kara’s other side. Lee glanced up, caught the expression on his father’s face, and immediately softened. He might be a pain in the ass – checking up on him at every turn and nagging him to get some rest – but his father really did care about Kara. The unnatural sleep was wearing as much on the eldest Adama as it was on him. He was just worried; they all were. There was no reason that Kara shouldn’t be awake. No reason they knew of, anyway. At the very least she hadn’t developed the same wet cough and low grade temperature that Lee was fighting, so she might have at least evaded that particular consequence from their little misadventure.

“Have you slept?” his father asked.

“She’s done enough for the both of us,” Lee replied, and he knew his voice was too sharp. Hell, if their positions had been reversed Lee would likely be insisting that Kara get out and go to bed. “When she tells me to leave, I’ll do it,” he said softly, pausing to cough and then catch his breath. “Until then I’m here.”

“We could have a cot brought in,” his father said on a sigh. As concessions went, it was a big one, but Lee still shook his head. “Lee, you can’t get better if you don’t rest.”

“I won’t rest until she’s okay,” he said softly.

“She wouldn’t want this,” his father argued.

Lee said nothing at first, and then he chose his words carefully. “She’s never left me,” he said carefully. “Not when we lost Zak and I came apart, not when my ship gave out and I couldn’t get home, and not when I thought the two of us would freeze to death on that ship. I won’t leave her now.”

“Where would she go on that ship?” Adama asked. He didn’t comment on the other two comments Lee had made.

Lee just shook his head. “It wasn’t just her presence. She talked to me, Dad. She… kept me from going nuts in the dark. I can’t explain it, but she was there. I can’t leave her; it wouldn’t be fair.”

Lee watched his father take Kara’s hand in his, running blunt fingers along the skin on either side of her IV. “They’re going to have to change this,” he said absently.

Lee nodded. He’d seen the puffy skin around the needle earlier and had reported it to Cassie. She’d assured him that she would take care of it as soon as she finished her morning rounds. Lee believed her. Cass had taken damned good care of Kara in the last few days. She was quick, competent, and she tolerated his presence without argument, which was more than either his father or his doctor had managed. She gave him fair warning when she was going to do something that might expose Kara – like managing the catheter or bathing her – but other than that she let Lee hang around without argument. Hell, she even asked if he needed anything while he was there. He didn’t know why she was so accepting when others were not, but she was. Lee was grateful. He was tired of arguing with everyone.

The feel of a hand on his back caused him to jump slightly, and that set off a slight bout of coughing. He was getting really sick of this. Turning his head, he saw Cassie standing behind him with a stethoscope in one hand and a simple smile. He wondered for a moment if he could conjure people up by just thinking of them, and decided against it. After all, every hope and prayer in the last few days hadn’t brought Kara back.

“I just need to check your lungs,” she said softly.

He submitted to the examination tolerantly if not willingly, breathing in deeply despite the discomfort when she asked. When finished, she smiled again and gave his father an approving nod. “He may not be listening, but he is recovering,” she told the commander. Then she turned her attention back to Lee. “If you won’t lie down, at least put your head down,” she requested as she stuck an extra pillow at Kara’s bedside. “You don’t need to watch me start an IV.”

He wanted to argue. He wanted to tell her that he didn’t need the sleep, that needles didn’t bother him, and that it was his responsibility to stay up and wait for Kara. He did none of those things, instead he reached for Kara’s hand, moved the pillow into a more comfortable position, then laid his head down on it.

“How did you do that?” William Adama asked in a combination of disgust and frustration. He’d been asking his son to do the same for the last day and a half, and the younger man didn’t even seem to hear him.

“I don’t ask for much,” Cassie said simply as she pulled a cart up beside her and began to sort out what she would need to start the new IV. “And I don’t ask for what he can’t give. I try to find what’s in between. He won’t leave her; that’s a given, and it’s not the problem. The problem is that he needs to rest. So you find a way to give one without taking away the other.” She flashed a smile at him. “Don’t tell me you are unfamiliar with the fine art of compromise.”

He had to smile back. Frankly, he hadn’t even thought of that. He was so used to just telling his men what to do – and seeing it done – that he simply demanded without further thought. It hadn’t even occurred to him that he was asking Lee for something he couldn’t give.

“If Lee was the one who wouldn’t wake up, could you leave?” Cassie asked softly. She wasn’t looking at him, but rather attending to her task of finding a new vein and preparing the site. “Even if you were asked, or ordered?”

Judging by the amount of time he’d spent in Life station with Lee fully conscious, still worried because he couldn’t get him to follow doctor’s orders, he knew he didn’t have to answer the question. Cassie already knew.

So he turned his attention from the technician to Kara, still silent and unmoving in the bed. Doctor Salik had told him that she would wake when she was ready, and not before. He hadn’t seemed overly concerned when the stimulant had not affected her, but then his manner was fairly guarded so William might have missed something. There had to be a reason for the extended unconscious state.

“Have you considered that she’d just tired?” Cassie asked in an absent tone, clearly more intent on her job than the conversation. “I mean, I don’t think I’ve seen Lieutenant Thrace slow down for ten seconds since I’ve known her. She probably just needs the sleep and her body knows it.”

“Lee hasn’t slowed down either,” he commented. “And he managed to wake up.”

“Yes, well that’s an entirely different form of stubborn. I really think he just did it to check on her anyway.”

William smiled at the tech who had finished her task and was setting the flow rate for Kara’s fluids. “You are an unusually observant woman,” he remarked. Cassie just smiled back at him. “So, what’s your opinion of the rumors going around. You must have heard them.”

“I hear everything,” she admitted, pausing to look at him. “I also watch and form my own opinions from what I see and hear first hand.”

Despite himself, Adama was amused. “And what do you see and hear?”

Cassie’s eyes moved over the couple asleep at the bed, Kara lying quietly and Lee sitting at her bedside with one of his hands holding hers and the other beneath the pillow she’d given him. They were both sound asleep, their breathing in rhythm with one another. Neither looked ill, or even particularly concerned. For all intents and purposes, they were sleeping comfortably. “I see two people who care about one another,” she said carefully. “Maybe even more than they realize.” She turned her head back towards Adama. “And I see a father who’s worried about his children, even more than his ship or his reputation.”

He couldn’t meet the certainty in her eyes. She did indeed see quite a lot. “Observant,” he finally admitted.

“They’ll be okay,” she told him, placing a gentle hand on his arm. “Just give them some time, and your trust. I’ve seen the scans, Commander. There’s nothing wrong with her, and he’s recovering despite his ignoring what the doctor tells him.” She took a deep breath and looked up over his shoulder, most certainly not meeting his eyes. This surprised him, because she was always very straightforward with him. “He’s put his life on hold for her, just the same as you have for him. That’s all. And maybe… maybe the best way to show him how to trust is to go back to work. You can’t do anything for him here; none of us can. Not any more than he can do something for her. It’s all about waiting now.” Her eyes came back to his with a snap. “Waiting is always the hardest part, but it goes more quickly if we keep busy.”

She was a medical technician – probably younger than either Kara or Lee – and yet her advice was sound. There really wasn’t anything he could do for Lee, except maybe to let him do what he needed to. Meanwhile, his ship was in Tigh’s hands, and while he trusted the man with his life – his crew – his ship – William Adama had responsibilities that he had ignored for the better part of a week. From the moment he’d realized that his children were in danger, he’d placed the Galactica in Saul’s competent hands and he had been a father. Perhaps Cassie was right; maybe it was time to get back to work.

“You’ll call me if there’s any change?” he asked softly. “In either of them?”

“Of course,” se agreed. “But I’m not worried. Neither of them is alone right now.”

Looking back to his children, he realized that she was right, on all counts. “Take care of them for me,” he said softly.

“Yes, Sir.”

He paused them, looking at the young technician with blond hair, blue eyes, and more comprehension than even an old man such as himself could manage at the moment. He’d always thought that maturity came with age, but now he had his doubts. Maturity came with wisdom, and this girl had plenty of it. So did Kara for that matter, and it was one reason he had always been drawn to her as much as an equal as the child she should be to him. His son had it as well, and it had been gained by his own experience, and not from the benefit of his father’s influence. Generations were supposed to pass on their knowledge down from one to the next. William Adama found it enlightening that for this one instance the knowledge was being passed upwards, rather than down.

“You’re a bright woman,” he told her softly.

She smiled at that, and then shocked him to the marrow of his bones by stepping forward, reaching up, and kissing him on the cheek in much the same way that Kara had always done. “And you’re a wonderful father,” she told him. Then, drawing back she added, “And commander.”

Her cheeks were pink with embarrassment, but she gave him another smile before she turned and walked out of the small room. He watched her, still stunned, but certainly not displeased. It had been a long time since he’d heard either one of those compliments, and he hadn’t realized just how much he’d needed it until it was done.

In more than a little annoyance, Kara shifted herself in the bed. She had become addicted to the quiet, and the current disturbance was grating on her nerves. Granted, a cough wasn’t something that anyone could control, but normally her fellow pilots had the courtesy to sleep in Life Station rather than to keep everyone else awake in squadron quarters.

She heard it a couple more times before the aggravation got the best of her and she opened her eyes. She would just have to help whoever it was to remember the art of courtesy; whether they liked it or not. She hoped she didn’t wind up in the brig for her trouble, but at least it would be quiet there. She felt completely exhausted, and she needed her rest. They all did. You couldn’t fight a war when you were half-awake.

The dim lights couldn’t hide the unusual location she found herself in. This was not squadron quarters. She was not in her bed. And it wasn’t some anonymous pilot doing the coughing.

It took a moment more for her to recognize that she was in Life Station, that Lee was the coughing individual beside her, and that she was hooked up to more tubes than she wanted to think about. An IV was in her arm, and next to her leg… she wouldn’t think about that right now.

Memory returned slowly, in a fuzzy and inconsistent manner. Flashes of darkness punctuated by cold, the warmth of Lee’s breath against her cheek, and a silence that was beyond anything she had ever experienced were the sensations that came to her first. After the sensations, came the knowledge of what had happened. She remembered the explosion then, and her panic. Then she remembered huddling with Lee at the back of a cold ship while they waited to die.

Which apparently hadn’t happened, she realized. Lee was beside her, the blankets covering her were warm and comfortable, and her body was stretched out rather than cuddled up in Lee’s arms. They must have been rescued at some point; she couldn’t remember.

But she could feel, and one feeling she had was significant warmth in her right hand. She moved the fingers slightly in a gentle grasp, and was rewarded by Lee’s squeezing her hand back. His head moved on the pillow, turning from side to side as though he was reluctant to wake, and then he raised his head. The smile that greeted her was a stunning surprise: relief, pleasure, and something more, which she couldn’t define.

“Hey,” he said softly, his voice deep and gravelly, then accented by a cough. “How are you feeling?”

She considered that, even as she squeezed Lee’s hand again. For some reason, it felt good to have him there. “Tired,” she admitted, her voice coming out sounding rougher than his had.

He smiled at that. “You’ve been asleep for three days,” he told her with what sounded like exasperation, albeit feigned. “How tired can you be?”

She moved carefully in the bed, shifting stiff muscles and carefully moving her IV trapped hand so she didn’t cause herself pain, and lay on her side. She watched Lee for a moment, not sure what she was looking for, but finding it. “What happened?” she asked.

“Too long a story to go into,” he admitted wryly. “The condensed version is that they found us, towed us back, and we’ve been stuck here ever since.”

“How long?”

He looked at her for a moment, then reached up to brush her bangs out of her eyes. The gesture surprised her, as did the look in his eyes. “It took them a couple of days to get us back. Then you had your extended nap. It’s been about five days.”

Her eyes widened in shock. “You’re kidding.”

He shook his head and didn’t say any more, but he didn’t have to. The gentle touch of his hand against her cheek said more than words could have. He’d been worried. She tried to think of something to reassure him, but before she could do so he turned head away and coughed. He sounded awful. “You okay?” she asked, concern rising. He was sitting up, so she’d assumed he was fine.

“Apparently the cold and my lungs didn’t get along very well,” he admitted. “Salik says it’s pneumonia. Getting better, though.”

“If this is better, I don’t want to know how it was before,” she told him with a glare.

“How do you feel?” he asked, his hand still at her cheek. Lords, he must have been really worried. Lee wasn’t the touchy-feely type any more than she was. No, they didn’t withdraw from touching others, but neither did they seek it out. This reaction from him seemed more concerning than his cough or her stiffness.

“Sore,” she told him. “Which makes sense if I’ve been stuck here for a few days. I’m more worried about that cough. Salik says you’re okay?”

He gave a shrug. “Rest,” he told her as he gestured to the pillow she was now facing. “And fluids,” he added as he showed her the IV in his own hand, the one that had been touching her face. She tried not to notice how cold her cheek felt as he did so. “I’ll be fine, Kara.”

“So why do you look like you’ve been in a Viper crash?” she asked.

He gave another shrug. “Tired, I guess,” he admitted. “And worried about you. I woke up a couple days ago, but you’ve been a little slower.”

“That long?” She could hear the shock in her own voice.

He smiled at that. “Tell me about it.”

“So you’ve been hanging around all this time for me?” She tried to muster up some of the sarcasm that she normally found so easily. It wasn’t so simple with the look on Lee’s face. It was hard to make a joke out of that type of friendship.

“You’ve never left me,” he told her softly. “Just returning the favor.”

The hand holding hers gave a gentle squeeze. “Thanks,” she told him. What else could she say?

He watched her for a while, blue eyes locked onto hers. She had never realized just how blue they were, but then they rarely got this close. He was only about a foot away from her. Still, she didn’t think eyes should be that bright in a room this dim.

“You’re my best friend,” he reminded her.

She nodded, but couldn’t think of anything to add to that.

They sat in silence for a long while, just looking at one another. It wasn’t entirely comfortable, nor entirely uncomfortable. It simply was.”

Lee was the one to break the silence. “I need to let them know you’re awake,” he told her with a smile. “And they’ll need to call my dad. He’s been here most of the time, too. I’m not sure where he is now.”

“My guess is CIC,” she told him, relaxing into her own pillow.

“I’ll go tell them you’re up,” Lee told her with a nod, moving to stand.

Later, she wouldn’t be able to say why she didn’t release his hand. Maybe it was the warmth there, or even the security. Hell, she would most likely roll it over in her mind for days afterwards, but would be no more sure than she was at that moment when he looked back at her in confusion. Still, her fingers didn’t release his. She thought it was stupid, and childish, but Lee didn’t argue. Instead, he sat back down and squeezed her hand gently in a silent communication, which they were getting very good at.

‘You okay?” he asked.

She didn’t know how to answer that. Physically, she felt fine. But the rest of her wasn’t so sure she wanted to be left alone, even for him to go someplace as close as the medical station she knew was outside the room.

“Yeah,” she told him, confusion clear in her voice and mind. “Just… stay. Lords, that sounds dumb, but…”

“I’ll stay,” he told her softly. She was relieved to be let off the hook. She didn’t want to try to explain what she didn’t understand herself. “Cassie’s in here every few minutes it seems like; she’ll check on you soon enough.”

“Okay.” She closed her eyes for just a moment, still exhausted despite the knowledge that she had spent the last few days asleep, then opened them again. “You look tired.”

He gave a shrug, reaching back over to trace a finger across her forehead. “A little. Mostly glad you’re okay.”

“I’m tough,” she informed him, but given her previous request for him to stay it seemed to be a statement that was absurd, even to her.

“I know,” he assured her.

He kept one hand in hers, and left the other on her head, thumb playing with her hair, but he did put his head back down on the pillow. “Tired?”

“Yeah.”

She closed her eyes again, grateful that he didn’t seem to require more of her, and resting if not actually sleeping. She didn’t feel any movement in Lee, but heard his faintly rattling breath become deeper and slower. She knew without looking that he was going back to sleep. That was best, she decided. She was having enough trouble sorting out her own emotions without adding his to the mix.

She almost wanted to do the same, but it seemed that since her mind had awakened it wouldn’t let itself shut back down. She still had a slight chill in her from the memories, although Lee’s presence did a great deal to alleviate that cold.

He had stayed. Even sick, as he clearly was, and definitely exhausted… Lee had stayed with her. He hadn’t left her alone, for which she was grateful. She had the feeling that if she’d awoken in the room by herself, panic would have been her predominant reaction. As it was, she had her answers as well as the comfort of a friend.

She could feel his hand in hers, his other hand against her hair. It was as though he needed that same assurance of her presence that she did of his. Dumb, she decided. As stupid as the times she’d broken wireless silence on a long patrol just to hear his voice. As useless as the times she’d dropped back in a formation to be sure his Viper was still there at her wing. It was something she’d almost come to expect from herself, although she did her very best not to let it be noticed by the men in her squadron. The last thing she needed to do was let them see a weakness. She dealt with enough from them as it was. Hell, the rumors lately were enough to test not only her patience, but also her self-made promise to try to keep herself out of trouble. It wasn’t that she particularly disliked the brig, but as Deputy CAG she felt that she needed to set some kind of example for the squad.

Some example, she thought now. Lying here, holding onto Lee desperately and letting him do the same to her. And it was desperation, she assured herself. It couldn’t be anything more. It must not be anything more. Words Lee had spoken in anger came back to her – working her way through the Adama men – and she shuddered. She knew he hadn’t meant it, and he’d apologized so many times, but her instinct told her that he wasn’t the only one with that thought.

How in hell did she feel about Lee, anyway? He wasn’t very much like Zak, which was her only base for comparison when it came to men, or love, or even affection. It wasn’t just his appearance, but temperament and strength. Lee was like his father, both determined and exacting. She knew where she stood with him. He wasn’t a joker, although he could certainly take one. He wasn’t one to encourage goofing off, although he allowed it. No, he was more like his father than he was like Zak. Lee’s eyes were his mother’s, as well as his skin tone, but nearly everything else was a reflection of his father. She wondered if he had any idea at all how much he was like his dad. The thought amused her.

“I haven’t seen that in a while.”

The near-whisper brought her eyes open. Lee was still asleep, but his father was standing just behind him. She was acutely conscious of where Lee’s hands were, but she thought withdrawal would be more obvious than staying where she was. “Sir,” she said softly. She didn’t want to wake Lee.

“Does he know you’re awake?” the commander asked. She nodded slightly and he smiled. “Good. Do I need to let the doc know you’re okay?”

She gave the same faint nod again, choosing it over speech. Adama smiled again, the vaguely familiar look in his eye something she couldn’t recognize as he looked at his son, and then turned to leave.

Kara took a deep breath, releasing it on a sigh. So much alike, Kara thought. So much in common; and they didn’t even know it.

Chapter 11

“You’ve got to be kidding!”

Kara just grinned up at him. Apparently, she wasn’t. “Full Colors,” she said, this time showing him her hand.

He gave a grumble, but passed the small pile of candies – or as close as they had to it – towards her. It was no different than it had always been. Kara was lucky in cards to the point that it wasn’t even fair. It wasn’t that Lee expected life to be fair, but it still rankled that he couldn’t beat her at Pyramid if his life depended on it. This hand, she had neither discarded nor taken any cards, which meant he had dealt her the hand. He had been certain that she couldn’t have much, which was why he’d met her ridiculously high bet. A guy couldn’t catch a break.

He coughed again, going for sympathy as much as to relieve the annoying pressure in his chest. He’d done this enough that his ribs hurt, and yet it still wouldn’t go away. The one medication they had remaining that could ease the persistent cough was something he was allergic to, and while he hated the coughing he preferred to breathe with difficulty over not breathing at all. Anaphylactic shock was not a fun way to die; he’d had enough of suffocation to last him a for a while.

“Still glad I’m awake?” she asked him with a wink.

“Yeah, right,” he grumbled, searching his pocket for another of the sweets. None; he was tapped out. And candy was one of the few things that was truly rationed aboard the Galactica, as they were hard to come by. He had some connections on the Celestia, having helped out an older couple with finding a lost relative who happened to be on the Galactica. It hadn’t been out of his way – he really hadn’t thought anything of it at the time – but the couple were in the candy making business and where they found the raw ingredients he had no clue. The result was great, though not what he’d grown up with. If he could just find them some dairy for chocolate…

So he gratefully accepted the bag of sweets that they managed give him every time he did a routine check on the ship. Normally there was enough to slip two of the candies into each of his pilots’ lockers with quite a few left over. They went over pretty well, and if no one knew where they came from then that was fine too. He didn’t put them in there for the credit, but to make a crappy job just a little less miserable. From the snippets of conversation he’d heard on occasion, he’d been a success.

He found it funny that the little candies had become more of a trading commodity than cubits. There was no use for money on the Galactica – there was nothing to buy – but candy on the other hand was rare and surprising. The little treats found their way into card games, bets, and even gift packages. But regardless of how many there were, there never seemed to be enough and Lee was finding that to be the case as he searched empty pockets once more with futile hope.

“Here,” she said, tossing one of the sweets at him and hitting him squarely in the chest. “If it’ll stop that coughing you’re welcome to it.”

He stuck his tongue out at her, but didn’t refuse the sweet. She’d won more than a dozen in this hour of playing cards; she had them to spare. Besides, they did help his throat.

“Another hand?” she asked hopefully.

“Not on your life,” he returned. “I have some good sense.”

She grinned at him, that pure Kara smile that seemed to be infectious. It had gotten her out of trouble more times than he could count, at least with him. “C’mon,” she insisted. “One more game?”

“No,” he told her firmly.

“Please?” she requested, and her voice was almost plaintive.

He might have broken, maybe, if his father hadn’t walked in just them. “Hey, Starbuck, what do you hear?”

That infectious smile moved from Lee to his father. “Nothin’ but the rain,” she told him.

His father rounded the bed and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead. “Grab your gun and bring in the cat,” he muttered.

If possible, Kara’s smile turned up a notch. “Boom, boom, boom.”

“I’m not even gonna ask,” Lee told him, rolling his eyes, although he was curious. He’d heard the greeting more than once – the well practiced by-play – and he did wonder about it. Neither seemed to be forthcoming with offering an explanation, and he just didn’t have it in him to ask them.

“I see you’re feeling better,” the older man said with a smile.

“Everyone gets awfully upset when I take a nap,” she said with a slight blush. “How long is it going to take for me to live this down?”

“Oh, this will be blackmail material for years to come,” his father told her. “But at least Salik kept you until this morning, so be quiet and enjoy it.”

“Right,” she muttered, and Lee had to laugh.

“It’s better than double shifts,” Lee reminded her.

“For who?” she asked in a deadly serious voice, and that earned her a laugh from both Lee and his father.

Still, Lee liked that she was looking a bit more like herself. She’d been in and out since waking, and just a little too quiet. She seemed to come around when Cassie had brought in another bottle of antibiotics for his IV, and since then she’d been giving them all hell. It was one of the reasons he’d bummed a deck of cards and talked Sharon – one of the few visitors they’d had – into raiding his locker for the bag of candy. He hadn’t planned on losing the whole thing, but it didn’t really matter. He was a lot more concerned with Kara looking like Kara than a few candies.

She was looking very much like herself just now. Smiling up at his father, Lee felt a knot forming in his stomach that was almost like a physical thing. He ignored it, and the confusion that came with it, in favor of just watching the two interact. It wasn’t the words that really caught his attention, but rather the comfort level. He could tell that they really liked one another, and there was a mutual concern that Lee couldn’t miss. Kara was as worried about whether the eldest Adama had been getting enough rest – given his work and the time he’d sent in Life Station checking up on them – as his father was about her. It was a sobering realization.

When his father had come in, Lee hadn’t been surprised that he was around. After all, they were two of his key pilots as well as his children. It made sense. It hadn’t occurred to Lee that his dad had other responsibilities, which was really unlike him. Usually, duty came first, and then family. This time Lee had assumed the family, and had forgotten that his father had a job to do as well.

“Saul owes me a few favors,” his father said in response to Kara’s concern.

“You poor thing,” she had responded.

“Be nice,” Adama instructed with a mock glare. “You know, he was as worried about the two of you as anyone else in CIC.”

“Be still my heart,” Kara tossed back blandly.

His father just laughed. “I told you to be nice,” he said again. Then, turning his attention to Lee, “How are you feeling today?”

“Better,” Lee said, and then undermined his words with a cough. When his father’s eyebrow went up, he felt compelled to add, “Really.”

His dad didn’t look like he believed a word of it.

“He’s feeling well enough to lose at cards,” Kara told Adama with a wink. “He still can’t win a hand to save his life.”

“Hey!” Lee said, taking offense, regardless of having thought exactly that thing earlier. He could win cards as well as the next person, just so long as that person wasn’t Kara. She had a luck that was absolutely unnatural. Thankfully, he’d been on the receiving end of that luck on more than one occasion, and unless you were deliberately challenging her, the luck seemed to rub off on those around her. It had saved his ass more than once.

“Hey, yourself,” she told him. “You lost.”

“Most people do against you,” he defended.

“He has you there,” his father told Kara. She looked awfully put out by the statement, but Lee was warmed by his father’s defense, however minor. It wasn’t that he minded sharing his dad, but he had hated feeling almost left out. With the two of them, Kara and his father seemed to have a strange, silent form of communication. They just understood one another; it was no wonder half the crew had thought they were involved. He had the same type of feelings for Kara; he didn’t mind sharing his best friend, but he wanted to be a part of the conversation. Lords, he felt like a little boy, pushed out of shape because two friends were getting along better with one another than with him. Since when did he feel like a six-year-old?

With arms crossed over her chest and a distinctive glare, Lee almost laughed at her. His father had the advantage of an excuse, and therefore a speedy retreat. “I do need to get back up on CIC,” he said simply. “Just checking up on the two of you.”

“We’re fine, Dad,” Lee assured him.

Adama waited a moment, nodded, and then kissed Kara on the top of her head before rounding the bed to exit. Before leaving the room he paused at Lee’s seat and placed a hand on his shoulder. He didn’t say anything, but then he didn’t have to. Sometimes a touch said a hell of a lot more than words, and the simple gesture did something for Lee that he didn’t even know he needed. He covered his father’s hand briefly with his own, and then watched the elder man leave.

By the time he returned his attention to Kara, whether by intent or not, she had closed her eyes and looked to be fast asleep. He watched her for a moment, then moved the cards out of the way and plumped up the pillow that they’d been using as a card table. Laying his head down, not touching her and yet close enough that he was reassured by the sound of her breathing, Lee slept.

Kara wasn’t sure what it was that brought her awake. Yes, there was noise around her, but not a lot. She opened one eye, her somewhat limited glance going to the spot Lee had occupied for the last couple of days. He was still there, still sleeping. She wondered why he didn’t just go lay down in his own room. She was fine, and he’d seen that. What more did he need? Still, it wasn’t much of a hardship to have him nearby. She really did hate hospitals, and he made it seem a little less like she was in one.

The slight rustle struck her again, and she looked up at the doorway. Her first instinct was to smile; visitors were always welcome, and a great way to keep her mind off both where she was and how bored she was getting. Then a memory filtered through the casual acceptance and her smile faded.

The shaking of the controls. The helplessness of the explosion. The fear of freezing to death in the back of a disabled shuttle. All of that had happened because of one thing, and one thing only… something had been wrong with the shuttle. She didn’t know what – oddly, she hadn’t gotten around to asking – but something had been wrong with it and because of that both she and Lee had come very close to dying.

Slowly, a bubble of fury rose within her as she looked at the man standing in the doorway to her room. Tyrol. Chief Petty Officer Galen Tyrol, Crew Chief. The guy who fixed the birds, or who trained those who did. He was the Lord of the flight deck – each and every plane his own, and he wasn’t above telling them as much – so why in the hell had hers come apart?

“Come to see if you could finish us off?” she asked bitterly.

He jumped slightly, but whether at her tone or her accusation she wasn’t sure. She really didn’t give a flying frak.

“I came to see how you’re doing,” he said softly. “Sharon mentioned that you were awake.”

“No thanks to you,” she muttered. “You can go now. But I’ll tell you this now, Chief. The next time you try to kill me, you’d better make damned sure it sticks because I’m not going through this again.”

He looked like she’d kicked him. Good. That was just about what she wanted to do. If it weren’t for the stupid tubes sticking out of her, she would have been on her feet and had him off his. But she was effectively tied down, and he damned well knew it.

“I’m sorry,” he said softly, still not entering the room. At least he knew where he wasn’t wanted.

Kara felt the movement beside her more than saw it, although Lee was positioned between her and the doorway. “Kara?”

“Get out,” she shouted, and this time her voice was just shy of a scream. She tried not to realize how hysterical she was sounding. She purely hated screaming women.

Tyrol stepped forward and Kara tensed. She’d wanted a reason to hit him, and this was as good as any. “I want to explain,” he said quickly. “We’ve torn the shuttle apart to figure out what went wrong, and there’s not a thing out of place. There’s no reason for the explosion that occurred. Electrical, fuel, and even oxygen systems are totally within specs.”

“Yeah, right,” she said, her voice still far louder than it should have been. But she was angry – shaking with it – and she wasn’t letting this man tell her that it had been her fault. “Shuttles just blow up on short hops because they’re old. Okay – forgive me – how about you go find an old ship and take it out yourself. Better yet, head on outside without the ship. You can freeze to death or smother; it’s a riot, trust me.”

“We’ll keep looking for the cause,” Tyrol said quietly. The expression of concern on his face was nearly enough to set her off again.

“Just blame it on the pilot,” she ground out. “That’s what mechanics always do. I’m used to it.”

“I don’t think it was your fault,” Tyrol said, his voice sounding pleading.

“Just get out,” she told him again. At the very least she wasn’t yelling now.”

“What did you find?” Lee’s voice surprised her. She had been so tied up with Tyrol that she’d all but forgotten him. “What systems haven’t you checked?”

The chief shook his head. “We’ve been over everything at least once,” he admitted. “Cally and I are taking it apart bolt by bolt, and we’ll find it. I swear it cleared the checks, Sir. You know I wouldn’t…”

“But you did,” Kara said, her voice low and threatening. Tubes or not, she was going to have to kill him. “You sent us out there to die. What if it had been a longer mission? What if there’d been a little less oxygen or a little more heat? What then? Would you have even come after us?”

“Kara,” Lee began, but she didn’t let him get far.

“No, I want to hear this. I want to know just why in hell he’s releasing birds that blow apart! I know the craft on this ship are old – hell, pretty much everything on the Galactica is old – but usually it at least works.”

“I’m sorry I’ve bothered you,” Tyrol said quietly, finally having the sense to back towards the door. “I guess… never mind. I’m sorry it happened. It won’t again.” He turned then, leaving her view.

“I’m not all that reassured,” she yelled after him, finally going for the jugular. “Frak, you were probably in the maintenance room with Sharon when some kid cleared that bird for flight. Maybe if you concentrated on your work instead of your… urges… then maybe we’d have a few more pilots alive.”

“Kara, stop,” Lee told her, his hand covering the fist she’d involuntarily made. “Quit before you say something else you don’t mean.”

“Who said I didn’t mean it?” she asked, her eyes flashing to Lee’s. Even that deep blue couldn’t ease the anger this time. “You know just as well as I do that…”

“Their jobs have never been affected,” Lee reminded her. “Things go wrong, Kara. It happens. It’s not fair, and it’s not right, but it’s the truth. Yelling at the chief won’t change it.”

“We trust that deck crew every frakking day to keep us alive out there,” she ground out. “And you’re telling me that it’s okay that this guy can’t find out why we nearly blew to Kobol and back? I don’t buy that. Pilot error isn’t an issue, Lee. I was the pilot, and I know what I did and didn’t do. You were there. If it isn’t pilot error, then it’s mechanical failure. They’re the only two reasons for a ship to blow.”

Lee’s grip tightened, his hand squeezing hers. “Shut up, Kara,” he told her softly.

“It’s the truth,” she said, and to her absolute mortification she found herself about an inch from tears. She was just angry, she told herself. She was just furious that she couldn’t kill the bastard right then and there. “He was so damned high and mighty about protecting the crew, and he sent us out there in a ship that couldn’t make it two miles.”

“Mistakes,” Lee started, but her voice cut over his.

“Are not acceptable,” she finished for him, whether it was what he’d planned to say or not. “There’s a war, Lee. How many more people have to die before the Cylons even get a second shot at us?”

Lee shook his head, not agreeing with her, even as she realized that the object of her wrath was gone. She didn’t care. She didn’t want to care. “You need to calm down,” he told her in a voice that was just over a whisper. It was something she wasn’t used to. Normally, Lee screamed back. They argued yes, but rationalization wasn’t among his usual techniques in dealing with her. He knew better; Zak had taught him better. Trying to reason just made her more furious.

Only she wasn’t. She saw understanding in those blue eyes that came from his being there with her through the worst of it. He’d been in that shuttle too, and he wasn’t placing blame. He’d come as close to death, was still carrying an illness from it, and yet he had forgiven the crew who had let them down.

“I don’t need to calm down,” she told him, her voice coming down an octave. “I just… Lee he… I can’t…”

One of his hands remained over her closed fist while the other stole around to the back of her head, pulling her towards him. Lee leaned his forehead against hers, saying nothing. She was still shaking, but not as much. She was still angry, but logic was starting to inch through the fury. “He wouldn’t put us in harm’s way,” Lee reminded her. “Hell, Kara you know that. There isn’t always someone to blame. Some mechanical failures don’t have warning signs, and they don’t leave evidence behind. Sometimes you just have to accept that there aren’t any easy answers.”

“It’s his job to keep the ships intact,” she said, and if he hadn’t had a firm grip on the back of her head, she might have tried to back away. But he did, and there was something reassuring about having him close, as though he was absorbing some of the anger, or at least diffusing it . “Someone’s always at fault.”

“That ship was older than the Galactica,” Lee told her. “You know it. She’d already served one war, and maybe there wasn’t enough left to put together from the scraps. But Kara, alienating our Crew Chief isn’t the way to get things done; trust me on this, I know because I’ve done it.”

“What can he do that’s worse than what he already did,” she muttered, her eyes finally closing as a wave of fatigue assaulted her.

“Kara, I want you to think, just for a second. What could he possibly gain by taking out his most qualified pilots? We’re all that’s left to defend the fleet. He loves this ship and you know it. He wouldn’t put the Galactica at risk by compromising her pilots, and he wouldn’t let a ship out into space if he didn’t think it could fly. He’s not the enemy.”

She tried to muster some more indignation, but she just didn’t have the strength. “We could have died out there,” she reminded him.

“And we didn’t, because his crew came after us. He didn’t cause it, Kara. He’s doing his damnedest to fix it anyway, and to make sure it doesn’t happen again.”

The shaking had stopped, and she felt herself getting weak and fuzzy. For just a moment, the weakness was stronger than she was, and it frightened her. “Lee…”

“Rest,” he told her, laying her back against the pillow and keeping his hand on hers. “You’re not thinking all that clearly. I understand it, and I’m sure the chief will too, but if you hit him you’ll be back in the brig.”

“We could have died,” she told him again, not sure why the thought was sticking in her head. She’d been in life or death situations more times than she could count. Hell, she’d faced enough for ten people in one day when the Cylons had attacked, but for some reason this felt worse. It felt… personal.

“We didn’t,” Lee said again.

“But…”

“Kara, just sleep,” he told her again. She wanted to argue. She wanted to rage against him, too. But she couldn’t find the will to do it.

So instead of fighting, she relaxed against the pillow, concentrating on the connection that Lee had maintained with his hand. He was close, although no longer forehead to forehead. She could hear him breathing. She could feel his warmth. And then she was asleep.

Lee sighed as he watched Kara finally surrender to sleep. He thought he had a good idea of why she was so angry. She always had taken on responsibility for everything around her, whether she could affect it or not. It was why she had taken Zak’s death so personally; it was why she was taking this to heart.

But just as she tended to blame herself, she also hated it. This time she was pushing that anger off on Tyrol. Yes, she had been the pilot, and if nothing was wrong with the shuttle than it had to be her. Lee couldn’t blame her for being upset. It was all too close to the surface for both of them. But he knew her and trusted her, and he was positive that she hadn’t made a mistake.

“How did you do that?”

Lee turned at the quiet voice to see Cassie standing in the doorway where Tyrol had been. “Do what?” he asked softly. The last thing he wanted was to wake Kara back up when she was finally out.

“That,” Cassie said as she gestured to Kara. Walking into the room, she carried a bottle of fluid that he knew was for his own IV. Great. He understood why they had gone back to the glass bottles in Life Station – it was easier to sterilize glass than manufacture plastic – but it still made him feel like he was in the middle-ages. “I’ve never seen her quit the screaming without putting someone in here.”

Her words drew him back from the state of medicine in a rag tag fleet, and he gave a sheepish grin at Cassie’s words. “Yeah, well she’s not exactly at her best.”

Cassie raised her eyebrows to give Lee a doubting look as she switched one bottle out for the other. “You haven’t patched up her victims,” Cassie told him. “She can do some damage when she puts her mind to it.”

“Sometimes she has reason,” Lee said, rushing to Kara’s defense. She wasn’t a bad person. She hadn’t had it easy coming through the academy, so she’d become a little tough along the way. Life hadn’t been all that kind to her, either. What luck she had in cards didn’t really carry over to all the rest of the areas of her life, so he figured she was entitled to a few rough edges.

“I’m sure she does,” Cassie allowed. “But I’d still rather see her calm down and think it through.”

Lee nodded at that; he felt the same way.

“You’re good with her,” Cassie told him as she headed for the door.

Kara wasn’t a daggit to be managed, and he wasn’t sure he liked the insinuation that she was hard to handle. He couldn’t dispute it, but he didn’t like it. He looked over at where she was sleeping, and reached out to brush her bangs back out of her face. He didn’t know whether to thank Cassie or argue, so he decided just to ignore her.

“Did you need anything?” Cassie asked as she turned back to him.

Yeah, for her to get out. It wasn’t a very nice thought, though. “A shower and shave,” he said wistfully. “I feel like I haven’t had either in a week.”

“You haven’t,” she told him with a grin. Lee sighed. It was hard to stay angry with the tech when she was so nice. And she hadn’t really been unkind to Kara; what she’d said was the truth. He just didn’t like it.

“What can we do about that?” he asked as he held up his arm to emphasize the IV.

“Tell you what, let’s get that fluid into you and if you’re up to it I’ll lock the IV and wrap the site in plastic. Then if you’re careful, you can get a shower.

“And clothes?” he requested.

She watched him a moment, and her smile broadened. “If you have to,” she allowed. “Although I kinda like the view with the gowns and robes.”

Lee blushed and wondered whether or not to take her seriously.

“It’s a joke,” Cassie told him pointedly, probably reacting to his expression. “Trust me, as many years as I’ve done this there’s very little I haven’t seen. It’s all old news. A body is a body, if you know what I mean.”

His cheeks felt even warmer, but he nodded as though he understood. He didn’t know what else to do to get her out of there.

True to her word, Cassie was back in half an hour to lock the IV, wrap and tape it, and he was on his way to his quarters to get clean. Almost half-way there he nearly collided with Sharon as she came around a bend in the corridor. The young woman didn’t look all that friendly.

“Hey,” he said by way of greeting.

She nodded and moved to walk around him, but didn’t say a word. It was quite a change from the chattering friend that had dropped off a bag of candy a couple of hours before.

“Sharon?”

The pilot sighed, then turned to face him. “I just ran into the chief,” she said simply. “What in hell did she say to him?”

Lee closed his eyes, tired of playing the peacemaker for the day. “Give her a break, Sharon. She’s had a rough week, and she’s only been awake for a day. She’s angry, she doesn’t have anyone to blame, and he was in the direct line of fire.”

“That makes it okay?” Sharon asked as she stepped closer. “You didn’t see his face.” At least she was keeping her voice down; Lee didn’t want the conversation carrying down the hallway.

“Yeah, I did,” Lee told her. “But you didn’t see Kara’s. You know her, Sharon. Does this sound anything at all like her? She and the chief get along great.”

Sharon took a deep breath and then let it out slowly. “She needs to apologize,” the woman said adamantly.

“I’m sure she will, but can she get out of Life Station first?”

Sharon looked as though she wanted to say more, but wisely she kept her mouth shut. He didn’t want to hit her with a charge of insubordination, but he would do it to keep her from hassling Kara. “She’s had a rough week,” Sharon finally said. “But so has Galen. He feels responsible enough without her placing the blame. You know damned well how careful he is with his planes.”

“That’s why your gimbals are always off?” Lee asked innocently.

She had the good grace to blush at the reminder. “That’s not fair.”

“No,” he agreed. “It’s not. But neither is taking what she says now seriously. She’s still shaky, Sharon. Give her some time. She’s sleeping now. Let her. She and the chief can battle this out when she’s on her feet. Then I’ll step back, and you can do the same. For now, you just keep him in his corner, and I’ll keep Kara in hers. Fair?”

“No,” Sharon complained. “But it’s as close as we’ll get.”

He had to smile at that. “Agreed.”

Sharon looked like she wanted to say more, but was reluctant. “What else?” Lee finally prodded. “Let’s get this cleared up now; hallway or not. I need to get cleaned up and dressed so that I can get back before she threatens any more lives.”

“Kara’s furious,” she commented.

He nodded his agreement. He didn’t think he needed to reinforce it verbally given their previous discussion.

“You’re not,” Sharon said simply. “Why?”

He gave another sigh. “No point,” he said. “I know the chief, and I know whatever caused this had to be outside his control. But keep in mind, I’ve had most of a week to put things into perspective. If he’d showed up at my bedside the day I woke up, or even while Kara was still out, I probably would have acted the same way. First instinct is to assign blame, Sharon. It’s human nature. Realizing that accidents happen – however careful we all are – takes some time to settle on. I got here; she will too.”

Sharon nodded, finally relaxing her confrontational posture. Lee hadn’t realized just how wound up she’d been until she had settled a bit. “By the way, nice outfit.”

“Thanks,” he said dryly, reminding himself mentally that he was still adequately covered. While the hospital gown might not do the job, the robe covered everything it was supposed to.

She finally grinned at him. “Damn, I was hoping for a blush,” she remarked.

“Not likely,” he said simply, although he was well aware that he’d done more than a little of that in his recent past. Still, the circumstances were different. “But it was a good attempt.”

“Well, if I’m not going to tackle Starbuck in her room, I guess I should get up to the mess hall. I need to eat before shift.”

“Enjoy your meal,” he told her. “And when you see him, tell the chief I’m sorry. He was in the wrong place at the wrong time; that’s all it was.”

“I’ll tell him,” she said softly. “But he won’t believe it. Hell, that’s why what she said upset him so much. He was already blaming himself.”

Lee nodded his understanding, but Sharon had already turned and was walking up the stairs towards the next turn in the corridor. He supposed he would have to talk to the Chief himself.

Chapter 12

Lee stepped out of the shower, reaching for a towel as he did so. At the very least the water was warm, and he felt a hell of a lot better clean. He scrubbed himself with the cloth, then his hair as well, leaving it spiked and sticking every which way before he wrapped the towel around his waist.

The plastic wrapped around his medication site was annoying, but it was better than having an IV pole and tubing attached. He slipped on clean underwear, shirts, and finally his pants. He almost felt human again. Almost.

He had slept most of the day before, regardless of being upright at Kara’s bedside, but the coughing hadn’t allowed it to become a sound sleep. She had slept as well, which was a good thing. The problems had started this morning when she’d awakened to feeling better and being in a bed. Kara didn’t do well with those two factors; he didn’t think either of them did.

This morning when Salik had come to Life Station, Lee had been unceremoniously kicked out of Kara’s room. Annoying – hell yes – but it had been then when he’d developed the need for a shower and some clean clothes. He hadn’t bothered with either since he’d been brought back to the ship. Gowns and robes were fine if you were sick, but Lee didn’t feel that way; not anymore.

In fact, he felt pretty damned good. While Kara had been asleep when he’d left her, most of the morning she’d been giving the doc a hard time. She hadn’t been quite her old, energetic self but she’d been close enough that he hadn’t minded leaving her alone. On the other hand, she was more moody than usual, so he had tried not to dawdle as he cleaned up. He’d only been half kidding with the remark to Sharon that he needed to get back in case she decided to kill someone else. Her emotions were even less predictable than usual, and that was saying something.

Cassie, on the other hand, had been more than predictable. She had been pretty great, actually. She’d been around most of the time since he’d been awake, and she was good about checking on both he and Kara without making him feel as though she were hovering. She wasn’t fussy, and she wasn’t annoying. And unlike the med tech he’d dated – had it been only a couple of weeks ago? – she didn’t attempt to grope him at every opportunity.

And yet aside from being grateful for adequate care without fussing, Lee didn’t feel a thing for Cassie. Nothing. It bothered him, because he really thought he should. He’d had excuses for not getting tangled up with other women in the last six months, but he couldn’t think of a single reason not to be interested in Cassie. Still, he wasn’t. War or not, one would think a man should show some interest in a beautiful woman. Shouldn’t they?

So not being attracted to Cassie bothered him in a way that he couldn’t quite define. Before the war, Lee hadn’t objected to female companionship. In fact, he’d been a little less than discriminating in his younger years. Most of the guys at the Academy had been the same. Women seemed to like men in uniform, and there was no reason not to take advantage of that fact. On the Galactica, everyone was in uniform so it really didn’t matter. There was also a ratio of about ten men for every woman, so most of the time he didn’t worry about staying clear of the opposite sex. The women had enough other men to pursue, and they didn’t make any effort past an initial rebuff. Usually. But the fact that he wasn’t interested now, following a life or death situation, was eating at him.

The only thing that bothered him more than feeling nothing for Cassie was feeling something for Kara. Something. There was a lot of history between them, so he’d assumed that friendship was what they shared. They were almost family after all – would have been if Zak had lived – so she was rather like a sister. It made sense that he’d worry this way about a sister, but he was too honest to leave it at that. Honesty had always been important to him; he saw no reason to lie to himself.

So Lee had begun putting some things together in his mind, and he wasn’t sure how he felt about his conclusions. First, there was his reaction to the rumors that she and his father had something going. It had bothered him far more than it probably should have. His father had a right to get involved with whomever he pleased, and rank really wasn’t much of an issue since the decree that reproduction was everyone’s primary responsibility. Age probably shouldn’t be an issue either, especially where having babies was concerned. Women had to worry about a biological clock, but men didn’t. And yet it had bothered him. He had been way beyond furious, saying things that were rude and cruel and completely inappropriate. He didn’t think he would have gone off that way if his father had been accused of involvement with anyone else – just Kara.

And if anyone else had taken a couple of days to wake after a rescue such as the one they’d experienced, Lee honestly doubted that he would have been worried. He might have been concerned, but that would be the most of it. With Kara, he’d been a wreck. He’d had trouble eating, hadn’t slept well, and couldn’t have left her side if his life had depended on it. It was terrifying, and the implications of it were even worse. What in hell did he feel for Kara?

And that was the problem – he knew his answer. He felt a lot; more than friendship, more than affection, and the feelings were not those of a brother. So he knew what he didn’t feel; and wasn’t quite sure what he did, but might. Having sorted that out, where did it put him?

Right back where he was before, he decided. There was no way Kara felt the same way. Sure, she’d backed him up more times than he could count, and she’d been a good friend to him when he hadn’t had many in the squadron, but that was a long way from feeling something… different. She was his best friend; how could he mess that up?

But he felt something for her that he hadn’t felt for anyone else in longer than he could remember: honest attraction. It wasn’t just her appearance, although she was a delight to look at, but her energy and personality and yes, even her penchant for beating the crap out of others and profanity that he needed to look up in a dictionary to fully appreciate. She was… fascinating, for lack of a better term. She kept him on his toes.

She also challenged him professionally, and he liked that. In all honesty, he couldn’t say the same for anyone else in the squadron. They weren’t bad, but every pilot he was working with was second rate. The Galactica’s primary squads of pilots had been lost in the first wave of attacks, leaving only those who were injured, incarcerated, or otherwise out of the cockpit. In recent months, he and Kara had been busting their butts to get pilots trained, but until they faced an attack they wouldn’t know if they’d been successful or not. Kara on the other hand could fly the pants off him. He loved it.

Did he love her?

Lee came to a dead halt as he walked the corridor from squadron quarters to the Life Station. Love? Holy shit.

He roused himself from the stupor that one simple word had put him in, aware that others were walking past and around him in the hallway. What had begun as a simple mental curiosity as to why he wasn’t attracted to a med tech had turned into something else entirely, and he was fairly sure his conclusions would earn him a black eye at the very least, and possibly a broken jaw to go with it.

Did he love Kara? Hell, she was going to kill him.

Kara winced as Cassie took the IV out of her hand, applying a gauze pad where it had been to stop the bleeding. “Hold that,” the tech told her firmly as she let go of Kara’s wrist to dispose of the remaining fluid and set the glass bottle on a nearby counter. Kara did as she was told, holding pressure on the site and watching the tech move efficiently around the room.

“How many techs are in Life Station?” she asked abruptly. Kara had only seen Cassie, but she knew there had to be more.

“Six,” Cassie answered. “But we try to assign one person to rooms, that way patients don’t have to get used to a lot of faces.

“Makes sense,” Kara muttered, peeking beneath the gauze to see that the wound was still seeping blood.

“I said hold that,” Cassie said, closing her hand over Kara’s to increase the pressure applied.

“Yes, Sir,” Kara muttered.

Rather than getting a groan or an admonishment, the tech gave a laugh and put her hands on her hips as she regarded Kara. “You really hate this, don’t you?”

“This?”

“Getting stuck in bed; being told what to do.”

Kara shrugged. It wasn’t her favorite; that was for damned sure. “When can I get out of here?” she asked.

“As soon as you’ve urinated,” Cassie answered. “Your vitals have been stable and you’re keeping down food and fluids, so all we need to do is be sure your plumbing is working alright.”

Remembering the catheter they had removed, Kara winced involuntarily. She’d had the horrible things on only a couple of occasions – once for an extended long patrol and once when she’d had her appendix taken out – but she hated them with a passion. She was just glad it was out and that she would be leaving soon.

“Where’s your other half?” Cassie asked as she cleared away the rest of her supplies and placed them on a nearby shelf.

“My what?”

Cassie turned and faced her with a grin that was just shy of challenging. If it had been any closer, Kara might have hit her whether she’d liked the tech or not. “Cute,” Cassie said in a wry tone. “The guy has been glued to your side since he woke up. You can’t tell me there’s nothing happening there.” Cassie’s head cocked to the side as she continued to look at Kara, who was unable to shut the mouth that had dropped open in absolute shock. “Or can you?”

“What in hell are you talking about?” Kara said, and only the confusion she was feeling kept the anger at bay. She wasn’t used to accusations; most people had better sense than to make them around her.

Cassie’s expression went from humorous to almost sad. “You don’t even know, do you?” she asked softly.

Anger was definitely edging in on her confusion. “Know what?” she asked in a tone just shy of deadly.

Cassie shook her head, looked around, and then smiled again more gently. “We couldn’t get him to leave,” she said softly as she gestured to the chair that Lee had used, still sitting beside the pillow Kara hadn’t bothered to move. “We asked, threatened… hell, Salik wanted to sedate him. He just sat there and watched you. He looked like he was worried you’d disappear if he wasn’t looking at you. Honey, that’s over and above the duties of a CAG, even a good one.”

Kara relaxed as comprehension dawned. “We’re friends,” she told the tech, peeking under her gauze to see that the IV site had finally stopped bleeding. “We have been for years.”

The smile faded from Cassie’s face, leaving only the sadness. “That’s more than friendship, Starbuck. At least on his end of it.”

“You’re insane,” she remarked as she crossed her arms over her chest.

Cassie gave a shrug. “Have it your way. In any case, let me know when you’ve used the latrine, then we’ll get you out of here.”

Kara nodded as she watched the tech leave the room. Her eyes settled on the pillow, now cold but still bearing the impression of Lee’s head. He’d stayed, she thought. He had stayed, even when he shouldn’t have. Did that mean something? Did she want it to?

Damn. Kara almost sighed as she turned the thought over in her mind. Adama men were never simple, that was for sure. But Lee didn’t show any of the signs that she was familiar with when it came to romantic interest. Zak had been almost fawning, complementary, and most definitely affectionate. Lee wasn’t really any of those things. And yet, could she really compare the two? Lee’s answer to a test was to study his ass off, while Zak would try to charm the questions out of the instructor. Lee was known for keeping out of trouble, but Zak had been legendary for getting into it. If they were so different in every other aspect, why should this be any different?

And why was she even worried about what Cassie had said? After all, the tech barely knew Lee; couldn’t know Lee if she’d come to that summation. Okay, so he’d been worried. They had nearly died together; he’d had reason to be concerned. And she had been out for two days longer than he had been, which would have made her nuts if their situations were reversed. She could understand his worry and she would have felt the same way, likely done the same things.

But that didn’t mean she was in love with him. It meant… they were close. Not that kind of close, but close enough to care. Close enough to worry.

And yet Cassie’s perceptions continued to eat at Kara. Matters weren’t helped when Lee arrived, looking and smelling a lot better than he had, even if the cough was still both annoying and persistent. He had an odd look on his face, and he didn’t say much when he came in beyond a hello and asking how she was, but she tried not to notice that. What she couldn’t ignore was that he looked absolutely everywhere except for at her, and she didn’t think it had to do with her treatment of Tyrol. Lee had seen her mad before – had even talked her down a couple of times – and it had never gotten to him before. Finally, after fifteen minutes of his avoiding her glance, she broke.

“What’s wrong with you?”

His eyes finally snapped to hers, but they didn’t stay there and she could have sworn there was a slight redness to his features. She wondered if he was running a fever again. He’d said that was how they’d known to check his lungs for the pneumonia. “Hmm?” he asked innocently.

Innocent… right. “I’m over here,” she remarked blandly.

Once more his eyes met hers only to be averted, and she was left with no more knowledge than she’d had before. Damned Adama men were a pain in the ass, she thought to herself. She had just enough sense not to say it aloud. He was sick, she was still tired, and oddly she had no desire to fight with him. It was rare, but she was just too damned tired.

So they sat in an uncomfortable silence until she asked him if he wanted to leave.

“I’m fine,” he told her. “I’ll stay until you’re ready to go back to squadron. You said they were sending you back, right?”

“As soon as I pee,” she agreed. “Of course, they didn’t bother with giving me anything more to drink, so it may be a while.”

“You want something?” he asked. Lee waiting on her… that was different.

“Not really,” she admitted. “Just out of here.”

He nodded, but she didn’t think he really understood. She would have suggested a couple of hands of Pyramid to pass the time, but cards didn’t sound all that inviting now. So she closed her eyes and tried to rest, rather than pondering the mysteries of the male mind.

He didn’t make any more sense half an hour later when she finally felt the need to use the facilities. He called Cassie for her, and then left the room while she was taken to the head; annoying, really, as he could have walked her there himself. It wasn’t as though they hadn’t seen one another in their skivvies before, and hospital robes covered more than underwear; co-ed living quarters were notorious for peeks here and there – it wasn’t talked about, but everyone knew it happened. Besides, she wasn’t more than a little wobbly, and that was from being horizontal for too long. Still, she was back in her bed and thoroughly annoyed before he reappeared.

“Where’d you go?” she asked before he could get through the doorway. “I thought you were gonna take me to the bathroom.”

He gave a shrug, blue eyes not on hers. Frak, why couldn’t he look at her? “Not my job,” he mumbled. “Figured you’d pass out and they’d blame me.”

She thought about that a moment, and then laughed. She was taking all of this way too seriously. Lee was just Lee, and he’d never made much sense. Except that he had, and she didn’t want to dwell on how much that change bothered her. Then again, the last few days had been pretty rough on both of them. Hell, she hadn’t thought either of them would live to get to this point, so she decided to just slow down and quit jumping to conclusions. “Sorry,” she told him. “I’m just… wired, I guess.”

“You sure you’re ready for squadron quarters?” he asked in concern.

She nodded adamantly. “I hate this place,” she muttered. “I just want to get some real clothes and be in my own bed.”

“That one’s bigger than yours,” he commented as he nodded to the bed she was sitting on. “And you still aren’t real steady. I’m sure they’d let you stay another day if you were willing.”

She shook her head at that. “I really don’t like hospitals,” she told him.

“You ever gonna tell me why that is?” he asked.

“No,” she said simply. Thankfully he didn’t press the issue, as she had no intention of telling her life’s story. Well, not again. He knew most of it anyway, she decided. Even though it had been the beginning of what she considered her childhood, memories of awakening in a hospital bed with strangers around her and her only family gone, pain so severe that no medication could relieve it, and confusion on top of everything else… She knew that it was all distorted by a child’s mind, but it felt real just the same. She hated hospitals, and that was that.

She glanced down at his arm where there was still some kind of device sticking out. “They spring you, too?”

He nodded. “Mostly. I come back twice a day for medication,” he explained as he showed her the site. They need the beds for people who are really sick.” He grinned for a moment. “Well, that and I’ve harassed poor Cassie until she’s ready to kick me out of here.”

She looked at it a moment, not really liking the thought of things sticking out of him, but then she’d just had a few such things removed from her own body so she imagined that she was more than a little biased against medicine at the moment. “We’ll, I’m free. Salik says light duty for seventy-two hours, then I come back to get cleared.”

Lee gave a wistful sigh as he walked beside her while they exited the Life Station. He stayed close, but not touching. He was just close enough to catch her should the need arise. She supposed she should have checked in with the techs before leaving, but she really just wanted out of there. She preferred Lee’s company to theirs. When she gave him a curious glance, he didn’t need the question to know what she wanted to find out. “I’ve got drugs for another week, and then they’ll decide based on my lungs.” He looked pitiful at the thought. “I’d rather just get in a Viper and go.”

She nodded at that, understanding completely. Being grounded was like death to a pilot, only worse. She felt that way herself.

The walk to quarters wasn’t entirely comfortable, despite Lee’s presence, or maybe because of it. She wasn’t sure about some of the looks they got along the way, but assumed that most were a result of either the thing in his arm or her own attire of gown and robe. She wished belatedly that she’d had Lee bring back some clothes for her so that she wasn’t so damned conspicuous, but it was a little late to worry about that.

Still, she was feeling pretty good by the time they got to quarters. It felt better to be up and moving, especially after so long on her back. She wasn’t used to being still, and it didn’t settle well with her. Even sick, she tended to keep on going until they made her stop, and thankfully she wasn’t sick often. The Life Station had been worse than the brig; at least there, she had been able to move around without getting glared at by the techs.

Stepping through the hatch into quarters was a revelation. It was late morning, and most of second and third shift were still hanging around. She must have seen twenty heads turn in their direction as Lee walked her through the hatch, and it was only then that she remembered how quickly gossip became an issue on the Galactica. If things had been bad before, she didn’t want to think about what they’d be now. She and Lee had been alone together for days in space, and he’d stuck like glue in Life Station. Rumors had flown with less provocation than that, and while initially that had been the intent of the mission – to divert attention from her and Lee’s father – she wasn’t sure she was happy with it being at this level. The stares were no longer speculative or curious, but frankly accusing.

Swallowing her anger – after all, in their place she’d probably be thinking things as well – she let Lee walk her to her bunk. “Thanks,” she told him. “I can get it from here.”

“You need anything?” he asked quietly. She’d seen his glance at their observers, but as usual he was completely unperturbed. He didn’t shake easily, as he’d proven earlier that morning.

“I’m fine,” she assured him. “But thanks for the escort.”

“Hey Starbuck,” a voice called from across the bay. “Have a good trip?”

She closed her eyes. It was nothing she hadn’t dealt with a thousand times, but she wasn’t really up to a full razzing by the pilots. Oddly, it didn’t bother her as much as some other things. Granted, they were normally less vocal with their bad jokes,, but she knew about them just the same. She’d dealt with them since the Academy; she’d ignore any insinuations now as always.

“Yeah,” she called back to Aames. “It was a barrel of laughs. You should try it some time. How about now? We’ll take you down to the kitchen and toss you in a freezer for a couple of days.”

Most of the pilots around him laughed, but something glinted in his eye. Oh frak, Kara thought. She was going to have to hit him. It wasn’t lack of desire, but rather the lingering weakness that bothered her. She hated to throw a punch with anything less than her best behind it.

“I don’t know,” he said, his tone lewd at best. “There are ways to keep warm, even in space. Especially when you’re not alone.”

She saw Lee tense beside her in her peripheral vision, but didn’t take her eyes from Aames. She didn’t dare. “Drop it,” she said simply.

“Drop what?” he asked, almost innocently. Shit. She’d at least hoped he had the sense to wait until Lee was out of there to start the teasing. She didn’t mind taking him up on the fight he was asking for, but doing it in front of the CAG wasn’t real bright. Aames must have known that, and was using it to keep her in check. He was a real candy-ass in a fight.

“Look, I’m tired and I need a shower,” she told him firmly. “If you want me to beat on you, can we at least wait until tomorrow. Even I have sense enough not to throw a punch in front of the CAG.”

The corner of Aames’ mouth quirked up as he glanced at Lee, who was still standing tense beside her. Frak, why wouldn’t he just go so that she could take care of this? “Like he’d send you to the brig,” Aames said with a laugh. “Right.”

“Drop it,” Lee said, repeating her words, and the tone of his voice was enough to silence any murmurs that were going around the room – most likely bets on whether or not she would hit the aggravating pilot.

“You gonna make me?” Aames asked. “Is it an order, Sir?”

Kara didn’t even see Lee move, but she saw the look of surprise on Aames face just before a fist connected with his left cheek, sending him sprawling to the deck. Her eyes widened as she followed the fist back to Lee, who was rubbing his knuckles as though he’d broken a hand. “Damn, I’d forgotten how much that hurt,” he mumbled.

The look on his face and her shock with the situation might have made the turn of events amusing, but Aames chose that moment to try his luck with the CAG. She could have told him that it wasn’t a bright idea. If Lee fought anything like Zak – which was likely as they’d learned on one another – then Aames was in for a surprise. Kara took a step back out of the way, enjoying the opportunity to observe rather than participate. It wouldn’t occur to her until later just how out of character the reaction was for her; or how it might look that Lee was fighting her battles. She had never really seen him tear into anyone, and at the moment she was just taking pleasure in the show.

Aames had picked himself up and run at Lee, doing his best to bring him down. Lee didn’t go. Instead, he absorbed the shock of the attempted, waist-level tackle and used both hands joined together to land a vertical blow on his attacker’s lower back. Aames went down again. Kara couldn’t hold back her smile.

“Stay down,” Lee advised.

“Why, you…” Aames didn’t finish his sentence, but he was on his feet again, and this time coming with an over-handed punch that would have done some damage if it had connected. It didn’t. Lee diverted the hand, letting Aames own momentum send him back into the deck. Kara winced; with that level of force, Aames had probably broken some bones in his hand. She wasn’t sorry – he deserved it – but she could sympathize.

Lee was just standing and glaring at the man, waiting for him to rise again. Thankfully, Aames had some sense. He didn’t move. Kara didn’t even realize initially that the collision with the deck had knocked him out. Lee turned his gaze to Kara then, and went back to rubbing his knuckles. It was then that she noticed the blood trailing down his arm, dripping to the deck. “Um, Lee…”

“What?” he asked, aggravated. His adrenaline was still high from the fight. If it had been her, she probably would have still been hitting the jerk, or at least giving a couple of kicks to finish the job. Still, injuries weren’t her forte. She tended to inflict more damage than she absorbed.

“You’re bleeding,” she told him as she gestured to his arm.

His eyes widened as he looked at the place where his IV had been, and was now clearly gone. Blood was flowing pretty steadily from it. “Frak.” He put one hand over it, trying to stem the blood flow but succeeding only in making a mess of it.

Kara shook her head and smiled. She was more than used to patching herself up after brawls; this wasn’t so different. She walked to her locker, grabbed a shirt, and tossed it to him. “Use that,” she advised.

“Thanks,” he said dryly, not sounding very grateful at all.

A slight commotion became audible closer to the hatch, and both Kara and Lee turned to see what it was. It occurred to her then that she probably should have noticed the dead silence in the room. She probably should have noticed that with twenty pilots looking on, someone was bound to rat out the CAG. She probably should have realized that even Lee wasn’t above discipline, and in a way what he had done was worse than her antics. He had not only hit an officer, but a junior officer who was his responsibility. She winced as she realized that this wouldn’t go over any better than her beating on Tigh.

Two of the Galactica’s marines stood in the doorway. One had a weapon drawn, and the other was close behind. Kara thought it was overkill. They never pulled weapons on her; most of them were on a first name basis with her. These two were Kevin and Archie, and they didn’t have the same look of amusement that they carried when they towed her off to the brig.

“Put it away, guys,” she told them as she checked on Lee’s progress with the shirt. It was too bloody to really see anything clearly beyond a rip in the skin. She wondered where his little IV thing had gone. “You’re going to need stitches,” she told him as she put the shirt back in place over the wound that was still flowing pretty freely.

“I don’t think that’s my only problem,” he said, and his tone wasn’t amused.

Glancing back to the marines, Kara realized that Kevin still had his weapon drawn. “Kev, put it away,” she told him. “And call Life Station; they have a pickup to make.” With the last, she gestured to where Aames was lying on the floor.

“Captain Adama,” Archie said in an authoritative voice. “You’ll need to come with us.”

Lee sighed. “Coming,” he ground out. Then he looked down at Aames, and Kara realized he really wasn’t sorry. It wasn’t the heat of the moment, or the adrenaline of battle. Lee was well and truly pissed at the pilot, even though he’d thrown the first punch himself.

“Lee?”

“Get dressed,” he told her. “Then get some rest. Something tells me you’ll be able to find me with no problem.”

She grinned at that, remembering just how many times she’d had those same thoughts. On the other hand, it seemed different with Lee on his way to the brig.

“Oh, and can you call my dad?” he requested. “I don’t want him hearing this from the marines. Hell, I don’t want him hearing it at all but I don’t think I’ll get a choice.”

She nodded again. “Kev, he’s bleeding pretty good,” she called out to the marine who had taken up station next to Lee and still hadn’t put the frakking gun away. “Run him by Life Station first.”

Kevin didn’t say a word, but Archie turned and gave her a wink as the trio left the quarters. She sighed, looking down at the trail of blood Lee had left over the floor, and only then giving in to the worry that had been edging its way into her mind. She hoped Lee hadn’t done any damage to himself in the fight. Aames was just out, and he’d come to in due time. She’d been in that boat herself a few times, although usually she gave rather than received the beating. A couple of times she’d run up against someone who didn’t mind hitting a woman, and had the advantages of height, weight, and speed. It hadn’t happened often, but it had happened.

Rather than dealing with Aames still form, she turned to the small group of pilots who remained in the bay, watching the show with more than a little amusement. These were probably the ones who had been betting on the fight’s outcome. “Okay, who’s the narc?” she asked in a disgusted voice.

No one answered, but then she hadn’t really expected anyone to admit it. They had put the CAG in the brig; hell, they probably thought they deserved a prize. But she swore that if she ever found out who it was, she would be sure they didn’t consider doing it again.

Chapter 13

William Adama raised his hand to indicate silence as he approached the brig’s desk clerk. Normally quiet, on this occasion the salute received was both silent and without extraneous movement. Without words, the commander gestured to the cell release that was positioned beneath the guard’s desk and received a smile. He heard the click of the door before he was even in fully in the room.

He’d been here before. Lords, he couldn’t even count the number of times he’d come to this room to find out what Kara had done – from her perspective – and to try to talk her into an apology for her actions. Once or twice he’d even been called into a headmaster’s office to find out just what Zak had done – this time – to violate some rule or regulation. It was something that he’d come to expect. When you were responsible for someone, whether your troop or your child, you had to take the bad with the good.

But never had he seen Lee lying on a brig cot, one arm over his eyes to keep the bright lighting from bothering him, and the other laid carefully at his side with white bandages all to obvious against his darker skin. Lee had never been a discipline problem. Ever. He knew every rule, and he followed them with a near-religious faithfulness. He relied on the book, and was the embodiment of calm when those around him lost their way. So what in hell was he doing in the brig?

Rather than saying anything, William opened the door of the cell and stepped through. Lee still hadn’t moved. He finally got a response from his son when he took a seat at the edge of the cot. It wasn’t a startled response as he would have expected from the man he’d thought was sleeping, but rather a tired acknowledgement that he’d done wrong.

“I’m sorry,” he said quietly.

William had to smile, and he responded with the same question that he’d had for either Kara or Zak in similar circumstances. “That you did it, or that you got caught?”

Lee lifted his head to face him, blue eyes unusually quiet, and expression flat. “Both,” he said simply. “Violence isn’t the answer to anything. I know that. I screwed up. And what’s worse is that my team needs to be able to trust their CAG, not fear him. I destroyed six months of work in a few blows. So, yes, I’m sorry I did it.”

“Then why did you do it?” he asked his son gently. There was enough self-recrimination in his voice to manage anyone; William saw no reason to pile on more guilt when Lee had done such a spectacular job himself.

Lee took a deep breath, then put his head back down and returned his arm to his eyes as though he couldn’t look at his father for the answer. “Aames was hassling Kara. She hadn’t been in the room for five minutes, she looked like shit, and he wouldn’t let up. Normally I let her manage it herself, but she looked so damned tired that I stepped in. He challenged, and I hit him. That’s it.”

“What did Kara do?” William asked. “Aside from paging me from CIC before the marines could report it to me.

Lee slid his arm up to his forehead and met his father’s eyes again. “Nothing,” Lee admitted. “She just… stood there.”

“Did it bother her?”

Lee shrugged. “I guess. She told him to drop it; he didn’t. I made him.”

William thought about that for a moment. “She’s a strong woman,” he commented, almost idly. “Very capable of managing her own battles, and she’s been doing it for a long time.”

“I know that,” Lee muttered. “I just wasn’t thinking about it at the time. I wasn’t thinking at all.”

“I know the feeling.” Lee gave him a questioning glance, then his father reached forward to trace the yellow shadow that had once been a bruise under his son’s eye. “When you care for someone, it’s easy to be defensive,” he said gently.

Lee shook his head. “It wasn’t what he said,” Lee corrected. “It was that she wasn’t even arguing.”

“Should she have?” At Lee’s intense look, William clarified. “Would it have made any difference at all if she’d told him off, or hit him, or whatever?”

With a sigh, Lee admitted, “It never has before. Hell, it never even got to me before. We laughed it off.”

“So what was different this time?”

Lee gave a sigh. “This time it felt… personal.”

“Why?”

“Because it was,” Lee snapped back, and William had to smile at finally weeding through the fact to find the emotion beneath. “She deserves better than that, and frak I’m almost ready to give her my room and take her bunk just so she doesn’t have to deal with those creeps.”

William smiled a moment longer. “It would make a statement,” William admitted. “But I don’t think it’s the one you want to make, and it’s certainly not entirely a statement that Kara would accept. Are you implying that she can’t take care of herself?”

“I’m saying that she’s earned respect from every man and woman in that bay,” Lee ground out. “It’s not a matter of rank or position, or even the fact that she’s saved this ship more times than I can count. It has to do with the fact that she’d die for any of them, and the best they give her back is talking behind her back, speculating about her sex life, and criticizing her choice of friends.” Lee lifted his head again to pin his father with an icy cold gaze. “Not a damned person asked if she was okay. No one asked what they could do to help, or if she needed anything, or if… Dad, it was like they don’t care anything about her. I don’t understand that. I’m sorry; I don’t. I can’t figure out why they don’t care. Hell, it’s almost a surprise that they came after us!”

William placed a hand on his son’s shoulder, encouraging him to lie back. “First of all, Kara is very well liked, both in her squadron and outside it. There were likely few offers to help because she would have snapped at anyone who made them. She’s exceptionally independent, and the best way to serve her needs is to do, rather than to ask. She’ll accept what’s already done, but she won’t agree if you offer to help her. Remember the old saying; it’s better to beg for forgiveness than ask permission.” Lee’s eyes closed, but William went on. “Second, Kara has been dishing out her own fair share of insinuation and joking since she’s been aboard the Galactica. Yes, she’s a target now, but that just shows how well accepted she really is. Her squad is comfortable harassing her, even when she’s been sick. Probably especially when she’d been sick, because it reassures her that she’s okay and that life is normal, or getting there. Finally, even if the insinuations were out of hand, she’s capable – more than capable – of fending them off in her own way and her own time. She’s done it for years, and she’s earned the right. She doesn’t need anyone to fight her battles for her, and doing so will only undermine the respect that she’s worked for.”

“And this explains why you hit me?” Lee asked bitterly.

William smiled at that, and then noted that his son wasn’t looking at him and let the smile fade. “That was a mistake,” he admitted. “On many counts, all of which I’ve listed, but more so because I’m your commanding officer as well as your father.” William rubbed his hands over his face as he searched for the words that he hadn’t been able to find for the emotions that had hit him that night. “The last place in the world I expected to hear condemnation was from you, so it took me off guard. The remark was also unacceptably intended to hurt; not joke or tease, Lee – you went for the kill. No, I shouldn’t have done it, but in the same circumstances I’d likely do it again. I’ve taught you to respect any woman more than that.”

“Mom did,” Lee said softly, but there was no accusation in the words, for which William was grateful. “You weren’t around enough to teach me anything except to love planes.”

“Point taken,” William granted. “But the bottom line is that you knew better, and you did your best to hurt a dear friend.”

“I know. And I’ve tried…”

“You’ve succeeded in making it up to her,” William interrupted. “For that matter – knowing you – she didn’t really take offense in the first place because she didn’t believe you’d try to hurt her. I didn’t either, if it came to that, but still…”

“Hit first and think later,” Lee said ruefully. “We’ve been around her too long.”

William laughed at the statement, not bothering to stress that he’d spent two more years in the woman’s presence than his son had.

They were silent for a long while, and then Lee asked quietly, “How much trouble am I in?”

William couldn’t hold back a sigh. “That depends on how difficult Lieutenant Aames decides to be,” he admitted. “He’s in Life Station for the moment, so I came here first. He would lose a lot of standing with the squad if he admitted that his CAG – the quiet, by the book CAG – beat the daylights out of him. On the other hand, getting you out of the lineup would put Starbuck in the position, and I don’t think he’d want that happening any more than being labeled a loser in the fight. As it is, you both drew blood, and we can probably convince him that it’s in everyone’s best interest to withhold charges and accept some extra duty as a penalty for violating regs. I don’t see this going to court martial any more than when any other two officers fight. It’s conduct unbecoming, yes, but it’s a long way from treason. As a matter of fact, if you’d both been of the same rank, or if he’d not been under your command, then we wouldn’t be having this discussion at all. He was insubordinate and you were inappropriate – those charges are just about equal. Extra duties and probation will likely end the situation.”

Lee let out a breath of clear relief. “Beats the hell out of the Astral Queen,” he muttered.

“Granted. And I wasn’t looking forward to using my rank to clean this up. I would have,” he reinforced, “Because I need my CAG. You’re too damned good at your job to lose because of some squadron stupidity.”

Lee smiled at that, and the relief in his expression intensified before fading altogether into a serious, direct glare. “You talked to Kara?” he asked.

“Briefly. Long enough to find out what happened and where you were.”

Lee nodded thoughtfully. “How did she sound?” he asked tentatively.

“Furious,” William said with a grin. “Although I couldn’t peg whether it was at you, at the situation, or because you’d been hauled off by the marines. She was definitely angry though. The majority of her profanity was directed at Lieutenant Aames, though, so I’d say that’s a good sign.”

Lee allowed himself a smile. “She’s not going to let me live this down,” Lee said fervently.

“Why this time?” William asked softly. “Now, don’t tell me it was because she wasn’t at her best; I’m not buying it. I can count on one hand the fights you’ve been in over the years, and all of them were with Zak over things that were very important. This is more than unlike you. What in hell did he say to her?”

“It’s not important,” Lee hedged.

“Son?”

Lee looked up at that, probably reacting to the knowledge that this was his father asking, not his commander. “She told him to drop it,” Lee said thoughtfully. “He was saying something about how our conduct while freezing to death was… inappropriate. She was tired, and she told him that, and she asked him to drop it. Dad, you know her. She loves a fight; if she was too tired to battle, then she had to be miserable. I didn’t plan to hit him; I just wanted him to leave her alone and let her get some rest. So I told him to drop it, he pretty much said that I gave her special treatment, and when I asked him again to leave her alone he told me to make him.” Lee grinned. “I did.”

William Adama smiled. “What happened on the shuttle?” he asked gently. That appeared to be what had set Lee off, so it seemed a good place to start finding out where something had shifted.

“The engine blew,” Lee said. “She ran a diagnostic, figured we needed to go into shut-down mode and wait, and then we did.”

“That was in the report,” William said softly. “What happened?”

Lee sighed. “I’m not entirely sure. We stayed by the back wall while it was warm, which wasn’t long. She slept a bit, and then we talked. It was so cold, so we got close and covered up. We… couldn’t breath, couldn’t get warm. She just lay in my arms and shivered. She kept me warm enough, but I couldn’t do anything for her except hold her, and listen. We were that way for hours, and then I woke up in Life station.”

“And the first thing you did was ask about her,” William said softly.

“I was in command,” Lee told his father, but clearly he was averting his eyes to do so. “She was my responsibility.”

“By that definition, so was Lieutenant Aames,” his father remarked. “Try again.”

Lee shook his head. “I really wish I knew,” he admitted. “But somewhere in between holding her and thinking I was going to lose her… Dad, it was like losing Zak or Mom, only this time I felt responsible for it. It was like a part of me…” He broke off, shaking his head. “Dad?”

“Hmm?”

“When you… were you and Mom friends before you… I mean…”

“Before we were lovers?” his father finished. With a blush on his cheeks, Lee nodded. “Yes,” he answered. “Very good ones; and better than we were after we were married, but that was my fault. I was on shore leave when we met and courted, and yes she was a dear friend by the time I proposed. If she had known I would get my own command… Well, it doesn’t matter. She gave me you and Zak, so we must have done something right somewhere along the line.”

Lee smiled at that. “You miss her?”

William thought of his beautiful Iilya. Blond, flowing hair, blue eyes, and that quirky smile that she’d passed on to their eldest son. “More than the Colonies,” he admitted. “Even after the divorce, she was still there. We still talked occasionally, and I knew she was just… there. Some days the only way I make it through is to… pretend that she’s just too busy to return a call. I know that sounds silly, but…”

“I know,” Lee said, his voice no louder than a whisper. “I miss her too. I didn’t think anything could hurt as much as losing Zak, but…”

William nodded. Words wouldn’t express what they shared – the loss of two good people, the loss of half of their family – so he didn’t bother to try. “You need to get some rest,” he finally said. “I’ll leave you here until I can talk to Aames, and we’ll go from there.”

“Thanks,” Lee said softly.

“Anytime, Son.”

And when William Adama left the cell, nodding to the guard to lock it behind him, he looked back to see that Lee had already rolled to his side, facing the wall, and was breathing deeply and evenly. If he wasn’t asleep, then he would be soon. William thanked the guard with a smile, and left the brig with his heart lighter than it had been in a very long time. Lee had been carrying enough strain in the past several weeks that a blowup was inevitable. William was just glad that the circumstances weren’t as hopeless as they could have been.

Kara shook her head as she watched the sleeping figure on her favorite cot. With a malicious drift of thought, she wondered how he liked urinating with an audience, and it was all she could do not to snicker. She had managed long ago to perfect the feat of doing so without anyone seeing a thing; it was all a matter of very careful arrangement of one’s uniform. It was the final indignity, but she’d even managed to beat that. You had to, she reasoned, when the brig was your second home.

But this man had been here only from the opposite side of the bars, and he was notorious for being quite high and mighty about her incarcerations. Granted, in recent years he’d found more humor in the situations than he had before, but he still left her with an impression that he was deeply disappointed with her lack of control. It had both angered and injured her. She could think of a hundred things she could say – none of them particularly polite – to drive the point home now that he was on the receiving end of some discipline.

But he was in here because of her, and that didn’t sit well with her. It wasn’t that she’d needed his help; she could ignore Aames’ insinuations or anyone else’s, and she had done so on more occasions than she could count. But he had stuck up for her in a way in which no one had since Zak, and that had been a hell of a long time ago. No, she didn’t need a champion, but she wasn’t above accepting some help when she felt like watered down oatmeal. And she’d felt about that bad. Between the frozen days off immobility on the shuttle and subsequent days in a hospital bed with no more movement than what the staff provided to prevent bedsores, something as simple as walking across the room seemed like more effort than it was worth. In fact, the thought of a bed located that close to a toilet looked particularly attractive; maybe she should have tried a swing at Aames…

Still, Kara had a duty. It was her job to get on this man’s nerves and to do it properly, because otherwise he’d start thinking he could fight every battle for her and things were bad enough without the squad thinking she was a helpless ninny. She was their boss – she required their respect – and they couldn’t follow orders if they looked past her to Lee every time she gave one.

“On your feet, Soldier!” she called out in her best drill instructor’s voice – one she hadn’t used since she’d been teaching at the academy.

Like the well-trained Colonial Serviceman he was, Lee jerked himself upright and to his feet, standing at attention to face her, before he even got his eyes open. Once he did open those blue eyes, and manage to focus them on her, the expression on his face was beyond priceless. “I have so always wanted to do that,” she said with a giggle.

He blinked a couple of times, then rubbed his eyes with his hands, making the white gauze wrapped around one arm quite visible. It looked a lot better than the torn up mess of meat that she’d wrapped in one of her shirts back in the bay, but she still wondered how much damage had been done. “Hey,” he finally said, walking over to the bars to rest himself against them, more than a little shaky. She could relate.

“How you feeling?” she asked.

“Been better,” he admitted. “You?”

She gave a shrug. Honesty wouldn’t make him feel any better; she felt like crap. Instead, she sidestepped the question by posing an observation. “Y’know,” she said casually. “Hitting an inferior asshole gets you in as much trouble as hitting a superior asshole.”

He downu at her, but his heart wasn’t in it. “You’d know,” he threw back, but his head was resting against his arm.

“You okay?” she asked with honest concern. Harassing her CAG was one thing, but kicking a man when he looked worse than she felt was quite another.

“Headache,” he admitted.

She nodded her head, feeling a momentarily guilt for surprising him into waking so unceremoniously. Not enough guilt, however, to force her into apologizing for the dig. Heavens knew that he’d done worse to her over the year, and normally he followed it with a lecture and two or three conditions before he’d do a damned thing to help her out. She wasn’t going to be that bad; she had just wanted to see him jump. “Anything I can do?” she finally asked. She hated to see him in pain.

“Nope,” he said in resignation. “Dad’s taking care of what he can. Looks like I’ll be mopping decks and cleaning out ovens for a while on my off-hours, probably right along side the auspicious Lieutenant.

Kara had to grin. “Oh, that’ll be priceless. You’ll either get along famously and team up against me, or you’ll kill one another and the bodies will never be found!”

“Beats getting tossed in prison without a trial,” he decided. “Or a court-martial. I really could have gotten into trouble for such a stupid stunt.”

“He started it,” Kara reminded it.

“Verbally,” Lee said, meeting her through the bars. “Not physically. I swung first; that’s the bottom line.”

“He gave you reason,” she reminded him, reaching through the bars almost unconsciously to grab one of his hands. She didn’t know why she felt the need to reassure him – and realized she would normally be much more inclined to harass him – but the look in his eyes bothered her. While getting in trouble was her area of expertise, it was something he’d never done well. “I told him to stop, and you did the same. If he was too stupid to listen to both his CAG and Lead Pilot, then he deserved what he got.”

“No one deserves to get hit,” Lee muttered, his eyes averting much as they had when he’d been at her bedside in Life Station.

Rolling her eyes, she tightened her grip on his one hand and reached through the bars with her other to turn his face to hers. “You’re allowed to be human,” she told him seriously. “And you’re not at your best right now. Why don’t you cut yourself some slack?”

He gave her almost half a smile. Almost. “Seems weird to have to doing the lecturing,” he commented.

She grinned at that. “Yeah, well it seems weird to be on this side of the bars. You want some pointers on making the time pass?”

She shook his head, but didn’t break eye contact, which for some reason she found to be a relief. “I’m not up to pushups,” he told her. “Or sit-ups, or curls, or any of the other things you tend to do in here. For the moment, sleeping is about as much as I can manage.”

“That’s actually what I was going to suggest,” she told him with a grin.

He gave her a grin, albeit a tired one, and went to sit down on the bunk. She would have been hurt at the implied rejection of her touch, but the fatigue in his features told her that there had been nothing personal in his action. He just couldn’t stand up any longer. While he’d been awake far sooner following their misadventure, he hadn’t moved around all that much more and he was probably as tired as she was. Truthfully, he’d spent that extra time at her bedside, so he was probably even more exhausted.

“How bad is it in quarters?” he asked as he sat further up on the bed, put a worn down excuse for a pillow behind his back, and rested himself against it.

“The usual,” she said, taking his cue to grab the chair against the far wall and taking a seat herself. The aisle between the wall and the cells was fairly narrow, so it wasn’t much of a reach. Really, it was only about a four foot span in which guards could accompany less agreeable prisoners in relative security. “They’re talking, and making their remarks, but no one’s really taking any of it seriously.”

“Even after I went ballistic?” he asked. The concern in his voice seemed more intense with this question.

“It’s really no different,” she said simply. “Lee, they insinuated that we were sleeping together before, and we ignored it. Then they started making remarks about me and your dad, which we didn’t ignore and that got entirely out of hand. Now it’s back to the status quo. We’re back where we started, and I’m thinking it’s a good thing. If they want to pair me up with someone, at least it won’t put a question mark on your reputation, I don’t have to deal with the accusations of homosexuality, and the guys stop making their half-assed passes. When all’s said and done, it’s probably a better scenario than if they stuck with the truth. I can’t work with the guys asking me out and getting all offended when I tell them no, and your dad can’t work with half of CIC whispering behind his back. You, on the other hand, can get away with just about anything. You can date me, and any three other women, and that’s all fine and good because you’re a man. It increases your status Lee, with me it decreases status. Yeah, it’s a double standard, but that’s nothing new.”

“They accused you of homosexuality?” He asked, his voice incredulous.

Leave it to Lee to latch onto the one sentence she’d spoken that she’d found uncomfortable. “It’s just one of many rumors, Lee. I don’t go out with anyone else, we deny I go out with you… so it’s their logical assumption that I have something to hide. And what’s the most carefully hidden secret in military quarters?”

“That’s sick,” he muttered.

She grinned at that; so prim and proper. “Lee, it’s a valid lifestyle choice, and more than common under military conditions when there isn’t exactly a balance between men and women. I don’t reinforce the notion, but it doesn’t offend me either.”

He shook his head. “Does any of this offend you?” he asked, and she could have sworn that there was anger in his voice.

“Well, I’m not thrilled that the Adama clan has taken over the defense of my dignity,” she admitted. “I mean, first your dad clobbers you, and then you beat on Aames. I’ve been defending my own honor for a very long time. I’m not sure why you think that all of a sudden it’s your job.”

He shrugged, looking uncomfortable, but didn’t reply.

For a moment Kara closed her eyes in pure frustration. She could get so much more out of Lee if she could just touch him. She could make him look at her, take a hand in hers, something. With some physical connection – his choice or not – she felt that she could read his emotions far more clearly. It surprised her as she’d never been one to like getting close. Even with Zak, whom she’d been madly in love with, she’d found hugs nearly confining and the hand-holding childish. It was easier to touch their father, reassuring him with a pat on the arm or a kiss to the cheek, and she’d become used to doing so. She supposed it was because he was older; either that or she was growing up. Her dislike of touch had stemmed from a childhood where she had been easily restrained, relocated, or just knocked around a bit. As a child, she never had come to really trust anyone who wanted their hands on her. Zak had helped her work through a lot of that because he was so damned tactile, and she hadn’t had it in her to deny him the privilege. Lee was less touchy – more formal – and that suited her well. His father was the same. But at this moment, she would have given just about anything to have access to the button that would allow her into that cursed cell. Hell, it was nearly her home; she should at least have a key.

“Lee?”

“Hmm?” he returned, but she could see him lying down, looking steadfastly at the ceiling, and not really listening to her comments. Damn, but she hated the stupid bars!

“Do you have a problem with… you know? What goes on in quarters?”

He was quiet for a long time. Too long. “I don’t think about it much,” he finally admitted. “I mean, I know it happens, but it’s kind of like your parents having sex. It has to happen, but it’s something you don’t dwell on because it’s damned weird.”

“So you’re saying you don’t want a list of who’s with whom in quarters,” she said in a sardonic tone.

“Lords, no,” he replied adamantly.

She laughed at that. Lee could be so old fashioned – so Caprican. Absently she wondered where she was from. She remembered enough travelling before she really had a memory that she wasn’t entirely sure if she’d been native to the planet or not. It was unlikely, given her hair and eye color as well as her build, but she liked to claim the planet if for no other reason than she had grown up there. Capricans were notoriously traditional – in almost every area of life. It was also the colony with the fewest prisons, the hardest penalties, and the lowest crime rates. It had been a wonderful place to grow up. More than once, she’d thanked the Lords that before her father went off that last, horrible time he had found the sense to hole-up on Caprica.

“That’s not a happy thought,” he remarked.

Kara’s eyes flashed up to Lee’s where he had sat back up and was looking at her urgently. “It wasn’t unhappy either,” she told him. “Just remembering. You can lay down; get some sleep.”

“What about you?” he asked as he looked over at the guard who glanced at them periodically, but in general was ignoring them.

She shrugged. “Hell, this is home,” she muttered, tipping the chair back to rest her head against the wall and her feet on the bars. “I’m more comfortable here than in quarters.”

Lee grinned, and then his face became serious. “I won’t be there for a while,” he said softly. “You can take my office if you want. You know there’s a bunk in back, and it’s quiet. Kennings is working the CAG position while we’re out of commission, but he likes his CIC desk better.”

She looked at him for a moment, considering a smart-assed remark at the offer, and then remembered how he’d reacted the last time she’d thrown such a gesture back in his face. “Thanks,” she told him honestly. “I may just take you up on that in a while. For now, I’m comfortable here so long as you don’t mind the company.”

He shrugged, then spun around on the bed and lay back down. “Suit yourself,” he told her. “Entrance code is 4837.”

Kara grinned at the number. “Zak’s ID code,” she murmured.

He shrugged again. “It’s easy enough to remember, and not as obvious as my own. I figured you could keep it in that mind of yours.”

Kara was touched, both that the offer still stood and that he’d chosen a security code that she would know intimately. It was a number she could never forget; Lee had known that. Had he always planned to loan her his space? If so, she’d offended him far more the last time he’d offered than she knew.

“Go to sleep, Lee,” she told him. “Once you’re out, I’ll go lay down. This place is a little intimidating if you aren’t used to it. Sometimes having a friend nearby makes it easier to sleep.”

He nodded. “Thanks, Kara,” he told her.

She just smiled; his easy acceptance of her presence soothing something inside her that she hadn’t known was irritated. She would wait until he was asleep, then she just might take him up on the offer of a quiet room and a soft bed.

Chapter 14

Lee was grateful that Kara had finally gone back to quarters, or possibly to his room although she hadn’t given him a definite answer when he’d offered it. Still, she hadn’t belittled the idea or made a joke, so maybe she at least had taken it into her consideration. For the sake of feeling better, he chose to think so.

He’d been sleeping – on and off – for hours. How many hours he had no clue, because he hadn’t really checked the time when he’d come in. He had been taken to Life Station first, and the mess of his arm had been cleaned up. Cassie had glared at him when she found out how he’d lost the IV, and then she’d put in three stitches to hold together the torn skin and had bandaged it in record time. She’d been silent for a very long time as she searched his other arm for a vein, becoming progressively more annoyed as she did so.

“Problem?”

“For such a decent sized man, you have the tiniest veins,” she had mumbled. She had finally gone for a hand, just below his previous IV and its insertion had hurt to hell and back. He thought she’d made it so deliberately. Then she’d taped it ridiculously and had wrapped the entire thing in the same gauze she’d used higher on the arm. She was not a happy person.

“I’m sorry,” he said tentatively.

“So am I,” she’d answered, her voice just shy of a growl. “But I get enough frakking business in this place without our officers beating on one another. It’s childish and useless, and I’m sick of it.”

“You get that much?” he had asked, surprised.

Cassie had sighed. “Enough,” she had muttered. “It’s not as bad here as my last assignment. At least you folks try to work together.” Then, glaring once more, “But you don’t always manage it, do you.”

“He was baiting Kara,” Lee had tried to explain.

“Words,” she announced unceremoniously. “Captain Apollo, they are just words. You’ve used actions, and violent ones at that. I see nothing that makes such behavior appropriate. I’ve told it to Starbuck on a dozen occasions, and I’ll tell you the same thing. Yell at one another, beat on your pillows, or scream into a launch tube – but keep your hands off one another. I don’t have the time or patience for this!”

“Yes, Sir,” he’d answered, far more chastened than he had been as a child when his mother had scolded him following an altercation with Zak.

Cassie had taken a deep breath, held it, and released it slowly. “I’m sorry,” she had said softly. “I spent almost twenty years working on Gemon near the Colonial Marine training facility. If I had a cubit for every stitch I’d put in, then I could have retired ten years ago. Useless, every damned one of those fights. We buried more than one man due to brain damage, broken necks, and even a few who bled to death before we could get to them. If I never have to deal with that again, I’ll be very pleased.

“As a rule, the Galactica has been far more civilized, and that’s why I’ve stayed for so long. And yes, I know that war changes things, but I will not see my men… my friends,” she emphasized with a glare, “Kill one another because of some pilot’s sense of humor, or another’s lack thereof.”

“How long have you been on the Galactica,” he’d asked, hoping desperately to divert her from the tirade she was beginning. If she was anything like his mother, and he was willing to bet that she was, once she got going it would be hell to get her to calm down. His mother had not been driven to anger very often, but when she had…

“Nearly ten years,” Cassie had answered, breaking into his thoughts.

He had looked at her sharply, stunned. “Twenty years on Gemon, and ten here. You can’t be thirty years old!”

“Flattery will get you another piece of tape,” she’d told him with a grin. “I’m an Arian. We age slightly differently; more slowly. While Capricans have a life expectancy of eighty to one-hundred years, most Arians live to nearly two-hundred. We’ve always been told it had something to do with the Arian suns and cellular degeneration, complete lack of radiation and all. For me it’s just a fact of life.”

“So you are…”

“Fifty-two,” she admitted reluctantly. “Although if you tell anyone, I’ll deny it staunchly. “There weren’t many who survived the war, and those of us who did will likely revert to the same aging that everyone else has when the gene pool is distributed in the absence of our suns. It’ll likely be the same with the Virgons, who lived with intensified gravity and are as well built as animals, and the Picons who are almost willowy in build. No one is certain, because there was so much traverse between the Colonies that pure anything is a rarity; the gene pool is already a bit clouded. In any case, I’m in no mood to alienate my shipmates or deal with inappropriate envy from every woman on this ship. Age is highly overrated. Experience is exhausting.”

Lee had smiled then, finally realizing how Cassie managed to act like his mother and still smile like a school-girl. Well, he smiled at least until his marine escorts had taken an arm each – carefully avoiding the white bandaged areas according to Cassie’s orders – and had marched him to the brig. At the time, he’d been too tired to think. He had lain down and slept. His father had awoken him at some point, and later Kara, and the rest was a fuzz of waking and sleeping on the narrow cot in the bright lighting. He could have asked for them to dim the lights, but just being in there was embarrassing; he didn’t want to draw further attention to himself by asking for favors.

But now, despite not being rested, neither was Lee tired. He was… alert. And he was beginning to think about the serious nature of what he’d done. At the time, it had been a matter of defending Kara, regardless of whether or not she had needed it. He wasn’t quite sure what his father would be able to do to get him out of the situation, nor was he sure that his father should even attempt it. He had done the wrong thing, and in retrospect he hadn’t even done it for the right reasons. He hadn’t done it because Kara couldn’t defend herself; he’d done it because she wasn’t defending herself. She was a good person, an amazing pilot, a terrific friend, and she deserved a hell of a lot more than gossip and innuendo from the pilots who were supposed to be her friends. No one had been sticking up for her. No one. And yes, his father’s explanation that she likely wouldn’t have welcomed such defense was valid, but it still stuck lee as cold and cruel.

But none of these things were new – not to either of them. On the other hand, the unfairness of it had never bothered him overmuch before. What had shifted? He’d already come to a frightening realization that his feelings for her were no longer simple, but if his current predicament was any indication, he needed to get things back on an even keel and soon.

But Kara hadn’t seemed mad at him; not exactly. She’d been a little exasperated, but then he knew that feeling. From the outside, it was almost always easy to look at a fight and see a path that could have led to a better, less violent conclusion. Normally even if one was involved directly in the altercation, hindsight showed more alternatives and less necessity towards violence. At the moment, neither was showing him a way that had been as satisfying as planting his fist into the side of Aames’ face. Childish? Hell yes. So much so that he might have to go easier on Kara the next time she got herself into a similar mess.

Which brought his thoughts back around to the woman who had inadvertently started the whole mess without even doing anything. She had just walked into the room, and criticism had hit her with no warning and less cause. Had they always treated her so badly there? Was it just his presence that had made the situation so obvious and intolerable? Had she fought with these same issues since she’d been aboard the Galactica?

He had no way of knowing, because Kara wouldn’t give him a straight answer. The woman truly did fight her own battles, and anyone else in quarters would be likely to play down the hassles that she’d dealt with. Anyone except a friend, that was. Lee needed to find one of Kara’s friends and get the real scoop. But who was a friend to the hotshot pilot with a sewer-mouth and a killer right-hook? No one came immediately to mind.

He knew Kara had friends. There had been a steady stream of heads which had popped through the doorway while she had slept in Life station, yet none of them had braved either her waking or his presence to say a word. But they’d come to check on her, and that had to mean they cared, didn’t it? He wracked his mind to find anyone whom Kara tended to spend time with – outside of himself of course, and his father – on her off hours. The only he could recall was general card games in the ready room and eating at the big table with most of the shift in attendance. He couldn’t think of anyone specific who appeared to mean anything to her beyond basic, borderline friendship.

He knew the difference, because other than Kara he really didn’t have any friends of his own. You couldn’t befriend those you were responsible for, and he supposed as Lead Pilot/Deputy CAG she had those same issues that he and his father did. But she hadn’t always been in a leadership position, and she had to have some friends remaining from her two years aboard prior to the war. His father had Tigh as a sounding board and confidant, and Lee himself had Kara. That left Kara with… well, with him. And Lee wasn’t one to show up often in squadron quarters, because he didn’t want his pilots to feel they were being watched. He wanted them to have his trust, and know they had it. It was one way he could encourage them without words. His father had taught him as much, and all the leadership manuals at the academy had warned against micro-management and destroying morale with an overbearing presence. But wasn’t it worse to not know what your men were doing to one another when your back was turned?

“You’re awake.”

Lee turned his head to see Colonel Tigh walking into the brig. Great, he thought. Just what he really needed. Lee was here for defending the one person that Tigh couldn’t stand – although why this was so, Lee couldn’t fathom. Kara had saved all their asses more than once, and as a former Viper pilot himself, Lee would have thought that Tigh could at least respect her skill if not enjoy her personality.

“For the moment,” Lee admitted. “How are things upstairs?”

“Quiet for a change,” Tigh answered, taking the chair that Kara had used and tilting it back on its legs. Lee suppressed a smile at the action. “Your dad just came on duty, and he asked me to look in on you; see if you need anything.”

“A pass out of here,” Lee quipped. “Or a damned good lawyer.”

“There won’t be any formal charges,” the colonel said softly. “It’s your first fight, you were provoked, and Aames spends more time here than your girlfriend does.”

Lee’s head snapped sideways at that, giving the older man a glare that clearly said “hands off.”

“You know what I mean,” the officer clarified. “Thrace is disrespectful and a loose canon, but Aames is an idiot. Standing side by side, it’s pretty clear who belongs behind bars. She’ll smack someone if she’s provoked,” he added as he ran fingers across his face as though he could still feel the shiner she’d given him months before, “But she doesn’t go after the CAG when he’s been out of Life Station less than a day. So the question may be whether you want to press charges against him.”

Lee’s eyebrows lifted in surprise, and it must have looked damned funny if Tigh’s laughter was any indication. “I’m not kidding,” the man assured him. “He attacked a superior officer in his direct line of command, and he did it in front of witnesses who swear you told him to stay down.”

“That was after I’d floored him the first time,” Lee mumbled. “I threw the first punch.”

“From what I hear it was for a good reason,” Tigh said with a shrug. “He was insubordinate in front of half the squad. You couldn’t just stand there and take it, and calling the marines in wouldn’t have done a thing for your standing with the squad. You handled it like a man, and then you took the consequences as they were given. From what I see, that’s making the best of a shitty situation.”

Lee hadn’t thought of it that way; at all.

“You probably also kept your deputy out of this place,” Tigh added as he glanced around the room and placed one foot on the cell bars to balance himself in the tilted chair. “She’s notorious for hitting first and asking questions later, and her record wouldn’t have been so easy to justify as yours.”

“The insults were against her,” Lee said softly. “It would have been her right

to hit him more than it was mine.”

Tigh shrugged. “Maybe, but it would have gotten her into a hell of a lot of trouble. She has a history of beating on those around her; you don’t.”

“Why?” Lee wondered aloud.

Tigh gave him a quizzical look “Why what?”

“Why does she beat on those around her? I’ve never seen her hit anyone without provocation. From the way I hear it, even the day that she hit you a table had already been thrown at her.”

“I wasn’t at my best,” Tight admitted. “And she can do some baiting of her own when she has the opportunity.”

Lee grinned. “She has a knack for hitting where it hurts the most, whether she lifts a hand against you or not.”

“And you put up with this why?” Tigh asked. “I know your father has a blind spot with her, but I always thought you were the practical one.”

Lee’s smile softened. “She may make life a living hell on occasion, but she’ll also go to the wall for you if you deserve it. She’s the best pilot I’ve ever seen, and she… puts up with me. It’s not a small task. After we lost Zak, I was at my absolute worst – so bad that everyone stayed clear. She showed up on my doorstep with home-baked cookies and a deck of cards. Then she lost game after game until I was sick from the cookies and so tired that I could sleep for the first time in a week. Her heart’s as strong as her temper; she just doesn’t always show it.”

“Sounds like a different woman from the bitch who threw a genuine apology in my face and told me I was a weak drunk.”

Lee looked at him for a moment. “Were you?”

For just a moment, Tigh looked like he’d take offense at the comment. Lee really didn’t care. Kara would defend him to the grave; he could do no less for her.

“Maybe I was,” the colonel admitted. “But that doesn’t make it a lieutenant’s place to point it out.”

“I don’t care if she’s an ensign,” Lee offered. “She has a right to be honest. Was it on the record?”

Tigh looked away. “No.”

“Then no harm was done,” Lee said with another shrug. “Except maybe to your pride, and if what she said was the truth it probably got you thinking. If she’d made the accusation official, you would have been answering charges yourself. And as a subordinate, it would be well within her rights to do so.”

“Perspective is a wonderful thing,” Tigh returned, settling the chair back down onto all four legs and putting his feet on the floor. “I hope you remember that when you’re called to answer the charges. There won’t be a court-martial, but it’s just possible we’ll have to do a board of inquiry. I don’t expect you to be found guilty of any more than inappropriate discipline within the ranks. You’ll get a slap on the wrist, if that. Your career would be pretty much intact, even if you father wasn’t running the fleet.”

“That’s reassuring,” Lee admitted, although if the truth were known he might prefer a couple of weeks in a quiet brig rather than a chaotic office.

Kara showed up shortly after Tigh had left, and Lee was still awake and pondering the discussion. It was amazing what you could learn from someone when you read between the lines. Unlike what he’d previously believed, Lee now didn’t think that Tigh hated Kara; he just resented that she spoke her mind. It was inconvenient on occasion, but rarely truly malicious.

“You are sprung!” Kara announced lightly as she rounded the hatchway to his cell. “I’ve already given the paperwork to the guard.” She hadn’t sounded this excited in months.

“How’d you swing that?” Lee asked as he heard the distinctive pop of the cell release.

“Well, Aames isn’t pressing charges, to begin with,” she said as she pulled the door open and stepped inside rather than waiting for him to walk out. “In fact, someone has been dropping hints that you might be pressing charges against him for verbal assault as well as insubordination. I think that’s why he’s still malingering in Life Station,” she told him with a grin. “He’s afraid that if they put him down here you’ll beat the stuffing out of him again.”

Lee just shook his head, accepting the quick hug Kara offered without considering how out of character it was for her. “So, what happens next? Hearing? Inquiry?”

“For now, you go back to quarters. I am your official escort,” she said with a formal bow that was almost comical. “And as your friend I have to say that you’re are frakking lucky that this went the way it did. If it had been me, I’d be looking at a court martial.”

“Yeah, well you do this on a weekly basis,” he told her dryly, but still he reached for her shoulder as she preceded him from the cell.

“Not anymore,” she disagreed, but the humor was still in her voice and her expression. She was loving this, although he couldn’t fathom why. He would have thought the incarceration would have been more amusing to her than the release and dropping of charges. “I may take a while to learn lessons, but once I do they stick like glue. Now I don’t hit anyone in the presence of witnesses,” she informed him slyly. “And I do it hard enough that they don’t dare say who did it.”

“You’re a brat,” he remarked as he gave her shoulder a squeeze before releasing it to accept the salute from the guard posted at the brig entrance. It seemed ironic, really. After all, he was still in some level of trouble – whatever Kara might tell him otherwise – and yet the guard was initiating the salute. The inconsistencies of military life had never seemed so erratic to Lee as they did at that moment.

But Lee was definitely pleased to see some of the bounce back in Kara’s step as she walked before him in the hallway. He also appreciated the view he got of her flight suit as she walked up the stairs to the next level. He shook his head to clear it. This was Kara, for Lord’s sake. He needed to get his head back on straight.

“You’re moving easier,” he remarked as he came up to walk along side her in the corridor. “Some of the stiffness easing up?”

She nodded. “The more I move, the easier it is. I thought about trying to get in a run, but I’m pretty sure that would be overdoing it.”

“No doubt,” he told her with a grin. “I’d offer to walk with you though, if I wasn’t stuck in quarters.”

“So long as you’re escorted, you’re legal,” she told him with a wink. “And as the highest ranking pilot who isn’t under house arrest, I can definitely say that walking is a possibility. At least for today and tomorrow, anyway. After that, if Salik gives the good word, I’ll be back on duty.”

“If you aren’t on duty, why the flight suit?” he asked.

“Laundry day,” she said with a shrug. “So anyway, I should be back in the air within the week.”

“Hopefully we’ll have this cleared up by then,” Lee muttered.

“Hopefully,” she agreed.

Lee’s office was on command level, just down from his father’s and within screaming distance of CIC. It had been moved there for a reason. If there were to be an emergency requiring his presence, the last thing he would have needed to do was run through the ship from Pilots’ quarters. When they arrived at the office, Kara punched in the code and Lee had to grin; she definitely had remembered it.

Choosing the code had not been a whim. It was a number that he’d been fairly sure his father remembered, and one he knew for a fact that Kara did. Privacy was one thing, but in the event that he needed something, he wanted to be able to have someone get it without necessarily finding him to gain access. If that ever occurred, he’d have to change it for security purposes, but so far the “lucky number” had held.

Lee had half-expected Kara to drop him at his door and take off, but instead she followed him into the office, which doubled as a sleeping quarters. The bed was recessed, hidden so that if you weren’t looking you couldn’t see it, and that gave some illusion of privacy. It was a small thing, but something Lee was grateful for. He hadn’t made his bed the morning before their mission, and he hadn’t taken time when he’d come back long enough to shower.

“Home sweet home,” Lee mumbled as Kara made herself at home on the corner of his desk. He had taken to leaving that one corner free, as it seemed to be a favorite perch of hers, and he hated having his forms scattered. He took a seat behind the desk, gave a sigh of relief, and closed his eyes to take just one moment to feel as though his world was back on its axis. It was an illusion, of course. He was still in trouble, his emotions were still a wreck, and there were still far too many issues unresolved to allow his mind to rest.

As if on cue, Kara began, “Lee, now that we’re alone, we really need to talk.”

Great, Lee thought, he four most fatal words in the history of language. Whether delivered by his parents, his friends, his boss, or his girlfriend, “we need to talk” was never a good thing. Usually it resulted in his embarrassment, someone in tears, and him feeling guilty as hell.

“About what,” he hedged, not opening his eyes to look at Kara.

“You know better,” she told him, and her voice was closer than his desk, although he hadn’t heard her body shift. In fact, her voice was coming from directly above him, so he could do no less than open his eyes to meet a searching hazel gaze. “You know exactly what I’m talking about,” she informed him.

One rule he remembered from basic law was that you never admitted to anything until you were sure what you were being accused of. Innocence, while not likely to keep him out of this indefinitely, was his best course of action at the moment. “No, I really don’t,” he denied. “What do we need to talk about?” There. That sounded calm enough.

She shook her head, using one foot to reach between his legs and snag a leg of his rolling desk chair. She shifted, moving him and the chair both to the side, and plopped her weight down on his lap. Anyone else he would have shoved off hard and fast, but this was Kara. She put one arm around his neck to keep herself balanced, and he felt more familiar in the position than he thought he had a right to feel. “You can’t fight my battles for me,” she said softly, almost a whisper. “And don’t give me any shit about me being one of your troops and that you’d have done it for any one of us. I know better. You would have reprimanded, or threatened, or maybe called in the marines. But there’s no way in hell you would have beat the crap out of someone for giving a hard time unless it had been directed at me. It has to stop.”

As dressings-down got, this was a good one. Kara wasn’t normally so wordy, and it took him a moment to sort through the explanations to the order beneath. “Yeah, it was because it was you, but not why you think.”

“Enlighten me,” she said simply.

“Kara…” He hadn’t a clue how to go on.

“Lee, this could have gotten you court-martialed,” she reminded him. “This isn’t a game. You’re in a position of authority, and I know how seriously you take that. Hell, you make me insane with how seriously you take it. This wasn’t you, and I need to know what the hell happened.”

“I let you fight your own battles,” he began. “Usually. But this one was below the belt. You were tired and I’d been worried, so when he… I just wanted to shut him up. I know that’s a lousy excuse, but it’s all I’ve got.”

Kara rested a soft cheek against his forehead. “I’m a big girl,” she said, again in that soft voice which he felt more than heard. “If you start taking on the world for me, what will happen when you’re not there? They have to know that I can hold my own with them. I’ve been proving it for two and a half years, Lee, and there’s no reason for them to start doubting it now. You need to let me take care of myself.”

“I do,” he argued. “Usually.”

She shook her head, rubbing blond bangs up against his skin. “In one ear and out the other,” she muttered. “Usually doesn’t cut it. Always. Do you understand that? I have to command these turkeys in the air, and sometimes on the ship as well. I can’t do my job if they’re looking around for my big, strong defender.”

“That isn’t how it was,” he argued, anger finally beginning to blossom. He hadn’t been undermining anything; he’d been dealing with an unacceptable situation of which Kara had been on the receiving end.

“Then how was it?” she asked, and there was anger in her voice as well. Great. Just what he needed; a fight with Kara would definitely earn him a court-martial.

“Kara, you looked like crap. You’d been out for days, and there were times I…” He took a breath before continuing. “There were times I wasn’t sure you were going to wake up. And then as soon as you did, everyone started acting like nothing had ever happened, that you weren’t even tired, and you were ready to tackle the world. Kara, I stepped in because you were too damned tired to do it for yourself, and it had to be done.”

She pulled back from him, facing him directly, eye to eye in this position with her sitting on his lap and less than two inches between their faces. “It had to be done?” she asked.

He nodded, his throat too dry for words. The motion almost knocked their foreheads together because they were so close.

“Why?”

One word. Why? Why couldn’t he have left well enough alone? Why couldn’t he see her as the little sister she’d always been? Why hadn’t he just left her there in quarters to get her stuff taken care of and stayed out of the line of fire? Why was it so damned hard to breathe?

“Because you matter,” he finally said, and it was as close to the truth as he was willing to go. He didn’t have a clue what he was feeling, only that he needed to protect this one woman, come what may, and keep her safe and with him. Friends in life were too precious and too rare, and one such as Kara didn’t come along every day. “I almost lost you,” he told he gently. “Yeah, I got a little overprotective. Doesn’t a friend have that right?”

“A friend?” she asked, her eyes seeming to change color as he watched them, brown fading from the hazel to leave a near-dazzling green.

“My best friend,” he assured her.

And then Lee Adama did the unthinkable. He leaned slightly forward, tightened his hold on Kara, and pressed his lips to hers.

Chapter 15

At first, Kara had no clue what to do with the situation. It wasn’t that she’d never kissed Lee before. In fact, she had kissed him quite a lot – comparatively speaking – over the years. She’d given or received a peck on the cheek, a brotherly kiss on the forehead, or an excited kiss on the mouth when something had gone very, very well.

Those were kisses she was used to. This one most definitely was not. Oh, it wasn’t an aggressive kiss, the way some had been when she’d had to teach the givers a lesson. Nor was it a tentative, questioning kiss, as though he was unsure of what he was doing or why. And it wasn’t a kiss to prove something – that he could awe or entrance the elusive Kara Thrace. No, it wasn’t a kiss like she’d felt before. Not from friends, or acquaintances, or family… not even from Zak.

This kiss was… emotion. Pure, simple, straightforward, and honest. A lot like Lee, if it came to that. His lips were firm but not rough, he was holding her without restraining, and his intent was… hell, she had no idea.

And therein lay the problem. She had no clue what to think of the kiss, and because of that she didn’t know how to react. Should she kiss him back? Was that what he wanted? Should she back things up, question, and try to make sense of the matter? Hell, should she just slap the living crap out of him for pulling such a stunt?

As she thought, and wondered, and ran various scenarios through that small part of her mind that was thinking rather than feeling, she realized that the kiss hadn’t really changed. It hadn’t intensified, or lessened, or stopped. He had continued to kiss her with a singular emotion that she finally recognized after wracking her brain in every direction.

Relief.

Now, that brought on a whole new line of questions. What was he relieved about? That she was okay, or that she hadn’t smacked the daylights out of him? That they were both alive, or that he was out of jail and she had been the bearer of good news? The questions were enough to make her mind swim with confusion, so she finally just turned off the thinking and let Lee do the rest. It was a lot easier when she did.

As though he’d sensed the change, Lee deepened the kiss slightly, although it was still gentler than most kisses she’d experienced. Not that she had a wealth of experience to draw from, but neither was she a total novice. She could recognize gentle persuasion as opposed to forced seduction.

And at the moment, as she had no clue where this was coming from or where he planned to go with it, she decided to just enjoy it. She hadn’t been kissed – really kissed – in years, and even then the efforts had been more fumbling and clumsy than sensual. Lee had no such inadequacies. He knew what he was doing, and yet somehow didn’t make her feel as though were clueless.

So they kissed. His hands remained at her waist, at once supporting and holding her, and she let her hands thread through his short hair and enjoy the varied textures between her fingers. He didn’t seem to mind the attention, but neither did it rush him. In fact, after what seemed an eternity, she felt him begin to pull back. She didn’t want to let him. She was enjoying the sensation of being… treasured, for lack of a better word. But neither did she want to pressure him. She had no clue what in hell she wanted, so she couldn’t very well impress her wishes upon someone else.

With a reluctance that he seemed to echo, Kara leaned back to look at him. His blue eyes were closed to her, and he was looking more than a little dazed. She knew the feeling. She watched as he slowly ran his tongue over his lips, as though remembering – or savoring. Then his eyes opened and she saw as much confusion there as she had felt herself.

“I’m sorry,” he said, and she could have sworn there was a blush on his face. “That really wasn’t fair, was it?”

“Depends,” she answered. “Why did you do it?”

He seemed to think about that for a moment. “Because… I wondered if there was more.”

She cocked her head sideways to look at him, silently asking him to explain the cryptic comment. In the tiny part of her mind that was still functioning rationally, she noted the distinctive change in the lap she was seated on, but it didn’t really register consciously. Later she would regret that she’d forced this conversation while he was so uncomfortable. At the moment, she just wanted to understand why her best friend had kissed her like a long-lost lover.

“I… don’t have a clue,” he admitted. “Except that I spent more hours than I can remember with you in my arms, and after a while it felt right. And when I thought you wouldn’t be there any more, it scared the living shit out of me. And now… I can’t put all the pieces back into the right order. I know we’re friends, and Lords I hope we always are, but…”

“But?” she asked softly.

“But I don’t want to screw it up,” he admitted. “And I think I just did.”

She shook her head emphatically, placing one hand on each of his cheeks. “You’re my best friend,” she told him firmly, holding his blue gaze with the power of her will alone. “I don’t think there’s anything you could do to change that. It doesn’t mean I’ll always agree with you, but hell, that’s half the fun of having a real friend. I know I can be a pain in the ass, and you’ll still be there when I get myself together. I hope you feel the same way.”

He gave her a slight grin. “Apparently I do, because you normally are.”

“Hey,” she complained, popping each of those cheeks with her palms. He grinned at her then, dimples at full strength, and a piece of her melted.

And then she was the one who was scared.

Standing quickly, Kara moved a few paces away, her arms wrapping around herself protectively. “So, no risk to the friendship,” she announced imperiously. “We’re just right back where we started. Right?”

He stood then, looking at her with an intensity she couldn’t place. She felt as though he was measuring every nuance of her features, every thought she couldn’t even fully form on her own. She felt like he knew her better than she knew herself, and Lords she hoped so because she didn’t know anything right now. She could barely remember her own name.

“No risk?” he asked, hands coming to her shoulders and resting there, solid and warm and strong.

Unable to speak, she shook her head. She’d essentially given him permission to do whatever the hell he wanted. She didn’t know what she wanted, so it seemed sensible in a strange way to let him take the lead. Sensible, but odd – she was used to controlling her own destiny.

His hands moved up, from her shoulders to her neck, still warm and solid, and then higher to cradle her face in his hands. All she could do was stare at him and wonder what he wanted, what he was planning.

After an eternity of looking at her, he leaned forward and kissed her again. There was a little less questioning in this kiss, and a lot more confidence. Once relieved of the burden of damaging their friendship, it seemed that Lee had a lot more on his mind than just being friends.

He never got rough; Kara had to give him that. But the kiss was definitely aggressive, sucking her into a wave of sensation and uncertainty that she’d never felt before. For the moment she chose to follow, granting him entrance to her mouth when he demanded it, and giving a soft moan as he made use of her apparent invitation.

Good Lords, the man could kiss! As meticulous with her mouth as he was in a preflight check, with no area untouched and no system unchecked. For the first time in her life, Kara didn’t care a damned thing about what was going on around her. She didn’t worry about being in control, or protecting herself, or even what was happening in her own body. She just… felt. And what she felt was incredible.

While his hands never left her face, all sorts of places on her body were reacting to Lee’s kiss. Kara could feel a flutter that started in the pit of her stomach and radiated outwards, making her fingers and toes tingle. She could feel the temperature of her body rise, and her breathing get short. She could almost feel a tangible connection between herself and Lee that went beyond where they were touching. No, she couldn’t read his mind. She didn’t have a clue what he was thinking. But she knew just what he was feeling.

The pressure against the back of her legs took a moment to register, and then a moment more to make sense. The desk. At some point, Lee must have turned her around and backed her towards his desk. She was now pinned there, between his body and the hard metal surface, and yet she still couldn’t find it in her to care. She let go of him just long enough to reach for the desktop and boost herself up onto it so that she wouldn’t get squished between the desk and Lee’s legs. Then she just held on to the edge of the desk for dear life, letting Lee’s mouth take her places she had never seen, and wouldn’t have believed existed if she hadn’t gone there herself.

Once she’d wiggled herself back onto the desk, her hands went to Lee’s shoulders, more to let him know she was still with him than for any other reason. He had released her face, and she was afraid he was interpreting her backup as a lack of approval. She was relieved when those warm hands came around her back, one high and one low, and hard arms pulled her close up against his body. Her legs separated instinctively, and Lee’s hand at the base of her spine pulled her tight up against his body

Reality registered in a hurry. The kiss was amazing – more than that if she was honest – but what she was pressed up against was more than a simple kiss, and if she continued with that damned honesty it was more than she was prepared to deal with at the moment. No, it wouldn’t destroy their friendship – she hadn’t lied to Lee about that – but there were lines that even the best of friends couldn’t cross without changing things.

As though sensing her reluctance, Lee’s hands moved to rest in the middle of her upper back, and gradually he eased them out of the kiss. She was grateful for both his restraint and his reluctance; she wasn’t alone in how she was feeling.

And she supposed that was why she wasn’t embarrassed – or at least more embarrassed – by what she had felt. Given the way she had been feeling, it was no surprise that the kiss had affected Lee the same way in which it had her. It followed that his body would be as changed as hers was. It was nothing to be shy about. Really.

After he’d ended the kiss, Lee tucked his face into the curve of her neck and gave a couple of nibbling kisses there. His breathing was finally slowing down, as was hers. She wouldn’t have believed that simply connecting two mouths could wreak such havoc in two human bodies. So that was what all the fuss was about.

“Friends?” he whispered, a word so soft that she barely heard the question. It made her smile.

“Always,” she told him, and felt him release a breath. It irritated her that he hadn’t believed it when she’d said it the first time, but she didn’t comment.

With a sigh, Lee rested his head on her shoulder and pulled her body up against his, albeit not so closely as before. She liked the sheltered feeling of sitting there with his arms around her body, and she eased her own arms beneath his to hug him back, her head resting on his shoulder in the same manner. That was the nice thing about the height of his desk; it put them on exactly equal levels, aligned head to head, chest to chest, and… she wasn’t going to think about what else was lined up just now. There wasn’t usually a lot of difference in their height, but in this position there was none, and she couldn’t complain about being eye to eye on this.

But aside from placing her in the direct line of a brilliant blue gaze, she was completely unsure of where this really put them. Kissing was nice. Their friendship was solid. But now what?

Lee had no clue what to do next. What on earth was a man supposed to do when he’d just changed every rule in his own personal universe, and that of his best friend? It wasn’t that Kara seemed to mind. In fact, she was making no effort to move out of his embrace, and her arms were even holding him back which was a reassurance that he needed more desperately than he had known.

But it was a step he didn’t even know if he wanted to take. It was a complication that he wasn’t sure he wanted to have. And all of the hindsight was less than useless as he stood there with his arms around Kara and his mind flying off the walls.

“What now?”

He couldn’t help but smile at that. It was his own thought, given voice by Kara. “No idea,” he told her.

“Well, one way or another I need sleep,” she said softly as she tucked her face into the curve of his neck. I’ve been going back and forth since I got out of Life Station. I’m about ready to drop.”

“You want to stay here?” he asked.

She did pull back then, giving him a quizzical look. Only then did he realize how the invitation might come across given the last few minutes. “I wasn’t necessarily inviting myself,” he clarified. “But if they’re going to hassle you in quarters. You might sleep better here. I can either get some work done, or take your bunk out there; it’s your choice. I just didn’t want a repeat of what got me stuck in the brig in the first place.”

“Then keep your hands to yourself,” she advised with a grin.

“Here or there?” he asked wryly.

“Your choice,” she allowed. “And if you wouldn’t mind… Well, it is pretty noisy in quarters.”

“I wouldn’t have offered if I hadn’t meant it,” he said pointedly, adding a small kiss to her forehead in order to reinforce his point. “Tell you what. Get some sleep, and I’ll go find some food. You have to be hungry.”

“Not really.”

“Well, you should be,” he said, releasing her with a wink. “You haven’t had anything except juice and broth. I’ll find you something solid.”

“Thanks,” she said softly. But even as he moved away from her, she didn’t change position.

“Are you okay?” he asked.

She took a breath, nodded, and slid down onto her own feet. It was then that he realized how deep the kiss had gone, because she was still out of breath.

“You sure?” he asked again. She didn’t look okay. She looked pale and shaky, and frankly worse than she had when he’d first brought her back to quarters. He took a step closer, because he wasn’t honestly sure she was going to stay on her feet.

If he’d had his way, he would have picked her up and gallantly carried her to the bed. But truthfully he didn’t feel all that much better than she did, so he settled for putting an arm around her and escorting her, tugging covers back and making sure she was sitting before he backed away. “Your blood sugar’s probably low,” he reasoned. “If you’ll be okay, I’ll find something to take care of that.”

Kara nodded, the dazed look fading slightly as she reached down and began to unbutton her uniform pants. It was nothing he hadn’t seen a hundred times; co-ed quarters were a matter of course in the military. He knew she probably wouldn’t take off more than the pants, and he’d seen her in far less in both the gym and the pool. But something about the last few minutes had changed things, and like it or not he couldn’t go back. He gave her a sheepish smile, opened his door, and ducked through it with an undeniable feeling of relief. They both needed food, yes, but more than that he needed a moment to process what the hell he’d just started. He hadn’t even meant to do it, which only made the situation more confusing.

Kara watched the door close with a sigh. She was in way over her head, and she knew it. What she didn’t know was what to do about it. She liked Lee… had aways liked him if it came to that. He was a good friend, a good listener, and he was turning out to be a fine boss as well. Truthfully, therein laid most of the problem. One did not get involved with one’s boss. Period.

The second problem, as she saw it, was that the boss in question was the commander’s son. She respected William Ada,ma far too much to casually move from one of his sons to the other. She didn’t think he’d see it that way, but a lot of people would and it would make things hard on him. It was the last thing she wanted to do. She would have to check with Bill to find out his feelings on the matter. That brought a smile to her face as she dropped her uniform pants and started working on her shirt. “Hey Sir, do you mind if I jump your oldest son?” No, she supposed that wasn’t the best way to put it. There was enough talk flying without adding her own sarcasm to the mix.

And that was another issue. The talk. Kara had been ignoring insinuations and backward glances since long before she and Lee had been much more than recently reunited friends. Hell, she’d put up with it at the academy when he’d been across the quad and Zak had been dating her. There was something about herself and Lee that just led to speculation. Maybe it was because they thought alike, or that they were willing to back one another when life got a little questionable. More likely, it had to do with his looks and a protective nature that he’d inherited from his father, whether he’d admit it or not.

There was a lot of his father in Lee. It wasn’t just the dark hair and blue eyes with a get-it-done attitude behind it, but there was something more indefinable. Yes, to be honest it drew her, even though she couldn’t really place it. Zak had had part of it, but those two had it spilling over. She wished she could figure it out, because she would have loved the ability to develop some kind of defense against it. It wasn’t that she minded having them around, but lately she felt almost like they were necessary and she wasn’t a woman used to depending on others for anything, be it her job, her safety, or her sanity. The simple fact that she looked for either Lee or his father when she heard a deep voice or a quiet laugh… well, it told her that she was not as objective as she might want to be.

But oh, it was nice to be able to lean on someone just for a while. She would never admit it, but there had been a certain satisfaction in Lee punching out Aames. She really hadn’t felt up to it, and it had been reassuring to know that someone was willing to do what she wasn’t able to. She might not have liked the results – Lee in the brig – but the action itself had been priceless.

Kara settled herself beneath his covers and grabbed his pillow. She found herself surrounded with him, or at least his scent. It was pretty nice, actually. She had promised him that she’d lay down as soon as he was settled in the brig, but truthfully she hadn’t felt all that comfortable coming into his room without him. She’d spent a few minutes on her own bunk, for what good it did, but very little more than that and she never had accomplished true sleep. Now, in the soft nest of blankets and sheets, she found her eyelids drooping and her body relaxing. Lords, she was tired.

Just as she was slipping into sleep, a panicked sensation woke her. It wasn’t anything concrete, just… fear. It was damned annoying. She looked around the room, peeked out the door, and then went back to bed more confused than when she’d jerked fully awake. It took her longer to settle this time, the echo of that feeling still haunting her slightly, but gradually she managed to find her way back to the lazy line between waking and sleeping, and she almost thought she might fall asleep this time. Again, right on the edge of waking and sleeping, she jerked awake in a mild panic.

This time, she wasn’t just irritated, but downright angered. What was wrong with her? Here she was, finally in a warm, safe place, and she couldn’t fall asleep to save her life. She was exhausted, physically and mentally, and there was nothing wrong, but still she wasn’t able to rest. It was going to make her nuts. Finally, she just quit trying. She stayed in the soft bed, kept her head on Lee’s pillow, but she didn’t even try to sleep. Instead, she let her mind run through battle scenarios, walked herself through the repair of a Viper’s high gimbal, and began mentally disassembling her sidearm. This kind of mental exercise usually put her right out, but each one seemed to make matters worse, She was more alert if anything; not less.

Persistently, she tried again, this time going over the schematics of the Galactica room-by-room from the CiC to the bowels of the tylium storage space at the tail of the ship. She was only as far as the gymnasium when the door eased open. From the smell of food, and the deliberate quietness of the person carrying it, she knew it had to be Lee. Opening one eye to make sure, she got the amusing view of him trying to close the hatch with one hand and balance the food tray with the other. He finally maneuvered it into place, but it had been a fun show to watch, and far more interesting than ship schematics. She waited until he’d put the tray on his desk – there was no reason to risk her dinner – before she spoke. “What took you so long?”

As she’d expected, he jumped about two feet before turning around to give her a smile. At least he wasn’t taking himself too seriously. “Food’s not easy to come by,” he admitted. “At least not between meals. And getting dishes out of the dining hall required two calls to my father. I hope you appreciate this!”

She couldn’t help but smile, fluttering her eyebrows in mock admiration. “My hero!” she said in a singsong voice. He laughed outright at that, coming over to sit on the edge of his bed and straightening the covers which were over her. “You’re supposed to be asleep,” he said seriously.

She shrugged at that. “It’s not lack of effort,” she admitted. “I’m having a little trouble going out.”

He nodded, although at what she wasn’t sure. He gave her leg a gentle squeeze and went over to grab the tray he’d carried in. She soon saw what had taken him so long. This wasn’t just any food, she realized. There was fresh fruit – a valuable commodity, at the least on the Galactica – and a couple of slices of bread. There was even some meat and gravy, a few slices of vegetable that looked slightly overcooked, and a glass of what she thought just might be milk. “Maybe you’re just hungry,” he offered. “Try eating something.”

Normally, eating was a chore, but then they didn’t get treats like this very often. She sat up in the bed, reaching for the slices of plump fruit first and giving a sigh when she bit into one. If there was one thing she really missed, it was having something fresh to eat. Most of what they managed was manufactured at worst, or at best preserved. “Did you eat?” she asked after swallowing a few mouthfulls.

He nodded. “Yeah. This is all yours.”

She smiled up at him and took him at his word, devouring the plate with more hunger than grace. When she finally made it to the glass, she had to smile. It was milk. How long had it been since she’d had that? “I don’t even want to know what you did to get this,” she told him with a broad smile and a last sweep of her mouth with the napkin he’d had tucked under the edge of the plate.

“Good, because some secrets I don’t share,” he informed her as he put the tray back on his desk. When he came back, he took his place back on the edge of the bed, down near her feet, and just watched her as she lay back against his pillow. “Think you can sleep now?” he asked gently.

She thought about it. Truthfully, she was exhausted, but every time she’d neared sleep she had awoken in a panic. She didn’t like the feeling of being afraid, however stupid it might be. “It’s harder to fall asleep than I’d thought it would be,” she admitted, giving him the only part of the truth that she wanted to admit.

He nodded, standing up, and then walked to the head of the bed. “Scoot up,” he ordered. Unsure of what he had planned, she did so. He grabbed the pillow and stuck it against the headboard, moving up to sit against it. Then he reached for her, tugging her up between his legs so that her back rested against his chest and his arms were around her, as they had sat in the ship. Finally, he grabbed the blankets and moved them into place with a flip of his wrist, pulling them closer around their bodies to make a warm nest. "Better?” he asked, when he’d finished his rearranging.

She thought about taking offense. After all, it was pretty presumptuous to just climb into bed with her after saying that he wouldn’t. But it was his bed, and he was warm, and felt a hell of a lot better than just a pillow and a few blankets. She’d been jerking awake rather than sleeping, and if his presence made it easier for her to get some badly needed rest, then she decided she’d just deal with the consequences later. She knew he wouldn’t try anything – at lest, not anything she didn’t want. And he wasn’t likely to do that while she was sleeping.

In the time she’d taken to think it over, Lee had already relaxed. His arms had tightened slightly around her, keeping her close and warm, and his breathing was slow and regular. Unlike the last time she’d lain in this position, she was warm and there was no reason for her to fear sleep. There was plenty of air, Lee was wrapped around her out of friendship rather than necessity, and there was no reason for her to be afraid. At some point, her body must have figured out what her mind had known, because she slipped into a deep sleep that held dreams and images that she couldn’t remember when she awoke hours later.

The first moments of waking were disorienting. She tended to sleep on her side, curled up around herself to stay warm. Waking on her back, half reclining, with Lee holding her… well, it wasn’t the usual order of things. But it did feel pretty good, and it beat the hell out of waking in the life stations with tubes stuck in places they should not be. She pressed back against her living pillow, liking the way his arms tightened and his lips nuzzled against her neck where his head was resting on her shoulder.

She would have liked nothing more than to stay there, tight in his arms and feeling comfortably well cared for, but the facilities were going to be a necessity. She pulled away with a little more force, only to find him holding her more snugly. Escape wasn’t going to be as easy as she had hoped. “Lee,” she said quietly, not really wanting to wake him. “Lee,” a little louder, “C’mon, I need up for a minute.”

He gave a sleepy protest, snuggling himself more deeply into her neck and pulling her body more closely against this so that she cold feel… Lords, she really needed to get up. “Lee, I need to use the head,” she said with more conviction.

Somehow, the words must have penetrated, because she was able to slip out of his arms and make a quick escape. She gratefully used his small bathroom, glad that she didn’t have to leave his room half-dressed and explain why she was there in the middle of the night. Or, as she looked at the clock, early this morning. Frak, the two of them had been in here alone all night, and while all that had gone on was some reassurance and comfort, that kind of explanation wasn’t going to fly in quarters. As much as she hated being the center of the gossip mill, the fact that she’d given them something concrete to use not just against her, but against Lee, was making her want to kick herself.

Kara splashed some water on her face and dried it with Lee’s towel, hoping that she didn’t look as bad as she felt. At the moment, her feelings were twisted into such a complicated mess that even she didn’t know what to do with them. Did she love Lee? Absolutely. Was she in love with him? Who knew? Had she enjoyed spending the night with him? Lords, yes! Would she be willing to do it again? She just wasn’t sure. Did she feel better about life in general after a good night’s sleep? Yes. Was she ready to tackle the world? Not likely. Did she just want to go back in there and go back to sleep in Lee’s arms? Oh, yes. Would she do it?

She didn’t have an answer, for a couple of reasons. First of all, she didn’t want Lee to take it the wrong way. When she’d left, he’d been… well, she was pretty sure he’d been uncomfortable. She didn’t want to add to that. In addition, while falling asleep in his arms last night had seemed the reasonable thing to do, it had been initiated by him. It seemed presumptuous to just go in there and crawl between his legs. She didn’t want to wake him if he’d managed to get back to sleep, after all.

“Kara?” The knock at the closed hatch startled her. She finished patting her face dry, annoyed with herself that she hadn’t taken a look in the mirror to see what he’d be facing.

“Here,” she told him.

“You okay?” he asked. “You’ve been in there a while.”

She supposed that she had. “I’m fine. Give me a second.”

“Okay.”

Closing her eyes for some much needed strength, she pushed the hatch open carefully, not wanting to slam Lee with it. “Sorry for hogging it,” she said with an attempt at a smile. It fell pretty flat.

“As long as you’re okay, I don’t mind how long you stay in there,” he said with a crooked grin. Lords, she wished this situation was as casual for her as it seemed to be for him. She just wasn’t used to waking up in beds that weren’t her own. She wasn’t sure what proper etiquette was.

Lee slipped into the tiny room behind her, and she wandered a bit around his room. Both office and bedroom, it was a cluttered space that had very little of the organization she saw in Lee’s actions. Granted, he hadn’t been around much lately. She hadn’t thought to ask who had taken over for them when they’d been lost, or while they’d been recovering. She wondered vaguely if that was the reason for the room’s disorder; it just didn’t seem like Lee.

“Kara?”

She jumped at the voice behind her, turning around and facing him with an awkward smile. “You startled me,” she said unnecessarily.

He looked at her a moment more, then reached out to take her hand. “Come sit down,” he coaxed. “We need to talk about this.”

“About what?”

He gave her a look that told her clearly that he knew she was hedging. She didn’t bother arguing, but instead took a seat next to him on the bed, her hand still in his. He continued to hold it, tracing the fine veins with one finger, turning it over occasionally to run his fingers over her wrist, down her thumb, around her wrist. “I didn’t plan last night,” he finally said.

“I didn’t think you had,” she told him.

He shook his head at that. “I don’t mean the sleeping,” he said evasively. “I mean the kiss. You were there, and it just felt… right. It felt good, Kara.”

Her throat was too tight to speak, so she just nodded. It had felt damned good.

“But if I’d known how awkward this was going to make us, I don’t know if I would have done it,” Lee admitted. “One thing I’ve always loved about being around you is that I could just be myself. I didn’t have to think first, or worry about your impressions, or wonder what you were really thinking. But it feels like that kiss opened up some door that… It isn’t that I want to take it back, but I want us back again. I need my best friend.”

At some point during the speech, Kara’s hand had flipped her hand over in his. “You have her,” she said softly. “I just… I guess I’m over-thinking it too. I like being close to you, and you’re about the only guy on board that I really feel comfortable with. I don’t mind if that moves forward a little, but I don’t want to lose ground.”

He smiled at her. “We had this discussion yesterday,” he reminded her. “The friendship stays, solid as titanium, whatever else we do or don’t do.”

“Got it,” she replied.

“And Kara?” He waited until her eyes met his before he continued. “We didn’t do anything wrong last night,” he said gently. “Not the kiss, and not what came after. And even if we’d… done more, we don’t have anything to be ashamed of.”

Kara nodded, although she wasn’t sure she believed it. “Lee?”

“Hmm?”

She took a deep breath, looking at the floor, then shifted her gaze to him. “Do you mind if we…” She stopped. The words sounded stupid in her own mind, and she didn’t want him to think she’d turned into a typical female idiot.

“If we…” he encouraged. “What do you want?” He asked.

She closed her eyes tightly, unable to look at him to answer. “Can you hold me for a while longer,” she said very quickly, hoping he could pick out the words because she didn’t want to have to say it again.

When he stayed silent, she thought she had her answer, but then he reached over with his hand – the one that wasn’t holding hers – and brushed a thumb over her cheek. “Anytime,” he told her softly. “That’s what friends are for.”

Chapter 16

William Adama felt better than he had in ages. He knew that the majority of his good mood from was knowing that two of his favorite people were okay. While he’d been reassured when they had found the shuttle and brought Lee and Kara back from the darkness of space, and then had been more comfortable when had both been awake, it hadn’t been until he had received a call from Lieutenant Kaytes – one of his many “spies” for lack of a better word – telling him that the two pilots were in Lee’s quarters that he truly relaxed.

If he was honest, he did indeed feel a small stab of jealousy towards his son, despite his better judgement. Not only was his boy a fine pilot in the prime of his life, but he couldn’t have found a better partner than Kara Thrace. Whether they remained only friends or the relationship progressed, Lee could have no idea how lucky he was to have a woman nearby who understood him. William had never had that – not until he’d met Kara – and by then he was far too old, and far too cynical to be in the running for her affections. Frankly, he counted himself lucky that she even cared for him as a friend, or father figure, or whatever. So yes, he did feel a bit envious of his son’s luck, but he wouldn’t hold it against his boy.

“That’s a sour look,” a feminine voice said with more than a little laughter. “Is the food really that bad? If it is, then maybe I’d better try my luck somewhere else.”

William smiled up at the young woman before him. Blond hair, blue eyes, and a killer figure were almost enough to hide the quick mind and startling gentleness that lurked behind it. Almost, but not quite. He’d had more than one run-in with Cassie Baydon in the Life Station, and the woman could be as formidable as any officer he’d ever encountered. She knew her job, and she did it whether she was challenged or not. Perhaps that was one reason that Adama trusted her more than any of the other techs and even some of the physicians. “It’s edible,” he admitted with a gesture to his plate. “Mostly.”

She laughed at that, and her smile was enough to brighten the room a bit. “Do you mind if I sit with you?” she asked. “I made the mistake of turning down one of the pilots for a date, and my name is mud at most of the tables. I’m sure you’d rather be by yourself…”

“Not a chance,” he told her. “The day I prefer sitting alone to sitting with a lovely woman, you can just call the coroner.”

She laughed again. “I don’t think that will be necessary,” she said as she took a seat across from him and laid her napkin in her lap. “Salik has given orders that no one is to die, period. I wouldn’t cross him if I were you.”

Adama shook his head with a smile. There were few people he didn’t intimidate outright, but this woman was one of them. Perhaps it was because she’d bossed him around so much in the Life Station, or maybe it was just her personality in general, but she didn’t even let her rank prevent her speaking her mind. “You’re trying the chicken,” he commented. “Brave woman.”

She laughed. “Protein,” Cassie said as she took a bite. “I’ll take it any way I can get it,” she said. “The drinks are disgusting, but I’ll even deal with those before I make myself sick.”

He looked up at her sharply as a miscellaneous number in her file seemed to register. “You’re Arian,” he said with more than a little wonder. “I don’t know why that didn’t occur to me.”

She shrugged. “I’m sure you don’t get a report on every person in the fleet,” she told him with a grimace as she ate another bite of the dubious synthetic meat.

“Actually, I do,” he admitted sheepishly. “But I won’t tell you that I read them. For some reason your name and record just didn’t connect.”

She smiled at that. “Well, nice to know that I’m so memorable,” she said with a smirk.

“There aren’t many who have been with the Galactica for ten years,” he reminded her. “Most people get fed up with the lack of amenities, especially in the medical field. I swear Doctor Salik has only stayed because he sees it as a personal challenge.”

She shook her head at that. “Nah. He just likes to complain, and this ship has given him a viable reason.”

She had said it with such a straight face that it took a moment for the words to sink in. When they did, Adama nearly choked, laughing long and hard until he noted a few more-than-curious glances around him and managed to bring himself under control. This was one of the disadvantages he’d found to eating in the dining hall; he was watched whether he liked it or not. But it had its advantages as well, to include the occasional person who was willing to join him for a meal, such as Cassie had now. “You’re so right,” he told her, wiping away tears from the laughter. “I think he’d be miserable if he didn’t have a good reason to yell at someone.”

Cassie wasn’t smiling. “That’s an understatement,” she said with a raised eyebrow. “But I’m pretty good about keeping him in his place. Every once in a while he forgets that he’s not dealing with a novice when I’m around, and I have to remind him how things should be done.”

“I’ll just bet you do,” William agreed with a smile. “Is there anyone on this ship you wouldn’t take on?”

She cocked her head sideways as she thought about it. “Maybe Starbuck,” she said carefully. “She hits hard, and she’s fast. I’ve seen the damage she can do. I don’t think I’d want to go up against her.”

“Me neither,” he told her. “But she’s a good one to have on your side, whatever the fight. In the air or on the ground, she’s something else.”

“You sound like your son,” Cassie said carefully.

That caught his attention. “Why do you say that?”

Cassie shook her head. “I put his arm back together last night,” she said. “He was… very defensive of her. He knows as well as you do that she spends as much time in the brig as out, and she can provoke a saint, but he was willing to get in a fight for her. Why do I get the feeling that you’d do the same?”

William thought about the words for a few moments as he finished his meal. To her credit, Cassie didn’t rush him, but waited patiently for him to put together his reasoning. “There’s not a person in this fleet who doesn’t owe their life to her in one way or another,” he said simply. “She’s just a lieutenant, but she can take command of a squadron and convince them that they can do the impossible. She led a squadron of ancient museum relics up against the Cylons, and saved all our asses.” He gave a shrug as he pushed his plate away. “I guess if you try to take that kind of spirit and confine it to a limited space – like a battlestar – you’re going to see some of that… energy slipping through.”

Cassie didn’t argue with him. “She’s better than she used to be,” the tech admitted. “The running has helped her a lot, and requiring an hour a day in the gym helped more. But somehow, I think the… exercise she’ll get with Captain Apollo may be what it takes to calm her down.” She took another couple of bites, but didn’t elaborate.

“What makes you say that?” William finally asked. He wouldn’t dispute the idea – frankly, he thought it was dead-on – but he wondered how someone else could put it together.

“I have eyes,” she said simply. She lifted her hand, and began ticking off fingers to keep track. “First, I saw him when he woke up and she was still out. He wouldn’t leave her, not even to go to the bathroom or eat or sleep. That’s more than just concern about a pilot under his command. Second, he fought for her. From what I’ve seen, he’s not the type to beat on those around him. He took out Aames and wasn’t even sorry, and the reason he gave was that the guy was hassling Starbuck. Finally, I’ve watched the two of them together. Something upset her while she was in Life Station – I’m not quite sure what – but she was hot. He kept her in bed, calmed her down, and even had her rational in record time. She’s one of the most difficult women I’ve ever known, and he has her pegged. Trust me, there’s something more than friendship there.”

Adama smiled. “You’ve described Lee’s interest in her,” he said softly. “What makes you think it’s returned?”

Cassie actually laughed at that. “Just look at him,” she said simply. “He’s gorgeous, he’s intelligent, and he’s downright sweet. And he’s got those damned blue eyes,” she added. “Those eyes are not fair.”

“Eyes?” he asked in amusement.

“Don’t give me that,” she said in mock disgust. “You’ve got them, too. Dark hair and blue eyes will melt a heart any time, no contest.”

He felt his cheeks heat at the implied compliment, and wondered if Cassie even realized that she’d given it, or intended it. She certainly hadn’t elaborated on it. Besides, he was not a young man, and whatever Cassie said, she was a young woman, at least compared to him. He was old and scarred, and he came with a family history that was less than stellar. Added to this he was an officer and she was both enlisted and under his direct command. He was a long way from being a great catch, and he didn’t have any illusions about it. Still, a compliment was a compliment, and from a beautiful woman it had the power to touch him. “Thank you,” he said simply. He didn’t know what else to say.

Her sarcastic gaze softened to a true smile. “I’m going to tell you what I’ve told Starbuck,” she said in a gentle tone. “She’s a pilot, yes, but she’s a person first. Ignoring that will only get her into trouble. I can say the same thing to you. You’re our commander, and damned good at running this ship, but you’re a person too. If you forget, you’re not doing yourself any favors and you aren’t helping the fleet. We need you sane.”

“Wise advice,” he mused.

She shrugged one shoulder. “Hell, I’m great at giving advice,” she said with an impish grin that reminded him oddly of Kara. “But don’t ever ask me to take it.”

The looked at one another for a moment more, and then the two of them broke into peals of laughter. Neither was aware this time of the looks they garnered, or the speculation in the eyes of the crew as another rumor was born.

Finding something to eat was simple, but Lee had decidedly more difficulty talking the galley personnel into letting him take dishes and silverware from the dining hall. It surprised him, because he’d been though this battle once, and he thought he’d proven himself by returning the dishes he’d used the evening before. He finally managed it after a lot of sweet-talking and one threat to call his father again. It wasn’t what he would have done for himself, but Kara changed the rules.

After more than half an hour of the most annoying negotiations he’d ever managed, he was on his way back to his office with meat, vegetables, and even a few slices of bread. It wasn’t a traditional breakfast, but it would have to do. He was careful not to spill the milk as he walked through the halls, balancing plate and glass on a small tray.

He’d left Kara sleeping soundly in his bed over an hour before. They had both dozed in and out for quite a while before she’d fallen asleep, and then it had taken him more than a few minutes to slip out from behind her without waking her. He hoped she had stayed asleep; she needed it. He didn’t think he’d ever seen her so vulnerable. She was far too tempting that way. He was almost looking forward to the caustic personality that she normally used to keep herself protected from the pilots around her. Granted, he would miss the ready warmth and gentle smile, but he also wanted Kara to be… Kara.

He didn’t notice the odd looks he was receiving until he made it to Pilots’ quarters. Raised eyebrows and secretive smiles ate through what little composure he was alert enough to manage. Hadn’t they been watching when he’d torn into Aames? Didn’t they realize he’d had it with the rumors and nosiness and insinuations? He was almost to the point of putting down the tray to give them a piece of his mind when he felt a gentle touch to his elbow. He jerked around, thankfully not tumbling the glass of milk, to glare at the offensive woman who was bothering him.

“Captain Adama?”

He would have yelled, but she looked so damned uncertain. Ensign Kington was one of his newest shuttle pilots, recruited from one of the civilian ships and not quite of age. It bothered him that they were taking in children to fly their equipment, however talented they might be. If it had been anyone else, he would have gone off, but she had an earnest look that he couldn’t be angry with. “Yes, Ensign?”

She cleared her throat, looking down and then back up at him. He could tell that she was shoring herself up for something. “Is… is Lieutenant Thrace staying with you?” she finally asked.

Well, that had been blunt. He’d been prepared for some sideways comment, but the frontal approach was a refreshing change. “She’s in my room,” he answered. “She’s tired, and there’s a lot of activity out here. Until she gets some food and rest, she’s better off out of the crowd.”

The ensign nodded her understanding. “Is she… okay? I mean, she was out-of-it for a long time. We thought she was fine when she came back, but if she’s not well enough to stay in quarters…”

He wasn’t sure if she was neatly fishing for information or honestly concerned, but given her age and expression he was willing to give her the benefit of the doubt. “She’s fine,” he said. “Like I said, she’s tired. Being knocked out isn’t like sleeping; it makes you more exhausted than rested. She just needs a chance to catch up on her sleep and eat something more than gelatin.”

Then the ensign smiled, and Lee finally relaxed despite the other eyes that he knew were covertly watching the exchange. “Can you tell her we’re thinking about her?” she asked. “It’s not the same around her when she’s gone; too quiet.”

Lee smiled at that. “I’m sure she’ll be back up to fighting speed within the week,” he said.

“Good,” the ensign said. “We’ve got Lieutenant Billings in the sims, and he’s about to make us crazy. It’ll be nice to have her back. She’s tough, but at least she’s fair.”

“I’ll let her know,” he told her.

She nodded and went back down the aisle between bunks. He watched her for a moment, shaking his head in surprise. Sometimes he was more cynical than Kara was; he’d forgotten that there were people on the ship who cared about her – not as fodder for gossip or the most current curiosity, but as a person, a teacher, or even as a friend.

He balanced the tray on one arm as he opened the door with the other, stepping through the hatch and closing it behind him. Kara was there, curled up in a ball beneath the covers with a tuft of blond hair poking out of the top. If he hadn’t known who she was, even he wouldn’t have been able to recognize her.

But the situation put him in a dilemma. He wanted her to eat – knew she needed the strength food would give her – but she needed the sleep as well. He hated to wake her when she was so clearly out. He finally settled on the compromise of watching her sleep for a while, deciding to wake her in a couple of hours to eat. The food would be cold, but it was almost cold now so there wouldn’t be that much difference.

Decision made, he put the tray on his desk and turned the chair around so that he could sit beside the bed in a similar manner to what he’d done in Life Station. After twenty minutes, it was all he could do to keep his eyes open. He’d tried reading through some reports that had been done while he’d been out of commission, but the words kept blurring. He had tried watching Kara, but a sleeping lump could only hold so much interest. Finally, he crossed his arms, laid them on the bed next to her, and leaned forward to rest his head on his arms. He would just rest a few minutes, he thought. Just a few minutes, and then he’d tackle the rest of the reports. It was his last thought before he fell asleep.

Hours later, he was pulled from sleep by the bed moving and soft whimpers from the lump he’d been watching. He was almost instantly alert, reaching for the blanket to check that Kara was okay. She’d said that the nightmares were bothering her, but this was really the first one he’d seen. He’d had a few himself, mostly involving the ship closing in around him, but given what they’d gone through it hadn’t been too bad. Kara was having a little more trouble, though. He knew she’d been slightly claustrophobic before the accident had happened, so it made sense that it had affected her more emotionally.

“Kara, wake up,” he said softly, one hand on her arm. She didn’t, so he shook her gently. “Kara?”

She came awake with a vengeance, uncurling her body, turning, and coming at him with fists at the ready. He was startled, but she only got in one strike before he had her wrists and had pressed her back into the bed. Because she was on a soft surface, he was able to be a little rougher without worrying about hurting her – she wouldn’t get a concussion from his pillow.

“Kara, it’s Lee,” he told her clearly. Her eyes were flashing every way except towards him, so he tried again. “Kara, come-on, wake up.”

Her struggling ended just as quickly as it had begun, her eyes focusing on him and her body going limp beneath his. He’d thrown one knee over her lower body to keep her from kicking, but the other remained solidly on the floor for leverage. He had her by both wrists, but she’d had quite a bit of distance to flail her body in, so when she stopped it was very obvious. She lay there for a few seconds, sucking in air as though she’d run a marathon, her eyes still flashing around.

As her breathing slowed, he saw it. He wouldn’t have if he hadn’t been watching her so closely, still holding her wrists because he didn’t know if she was fully awake or not and he knew she’d hurt him if she had the chance before she was awake. It wasn’t so much that she was the better fighter, but he’d be trying not to hurt her. If she wasn’t coherent, she wouldn’t be nearly as careful.

One tear slipped from the corner of her eye, sliding down the right side of her face and dripping off just below her ear. The second tear was quick to follow, and then one from the other side. She was struggling slightly, but it wasn’t the same mindless flailing it had been when she’d awoken. This was movement with a purpose; she was trying to get away from him – to get away period.

Under any other circumstances, he would have let her. She had a right to manage this any way she chose, and he really didn’t have the knowledge to help her through it. But he’d been there. He’d felt the cold, fought for breath, and he’d know the fear that no one would find them. He knew it, and he had battled enough of his own nightmares to know that she had to be terrified.

It only took him a moment more to respond. Holding her had helped that morning, so it was the direction he took this time. Releasing her wrists, he scooped her upper-body close to his, one arm beneath each of hers, and pulled her close against him. He half expected her to fight him, but once more she surprised him. Her arms went around his neck tightly, her face burrowing into his chest as she held onto him and cried.

Lee held her that way until his back hurt from the awkward angle and he knew he had bruises from her hands on his neck. He had moved one hand to the back of her head, gently stroking while he murmured soft words that he hoped were comforting. She was safe now; he was here with her; she’d be okay. He wasn’t sure how much was penetrating the silent sobs, but he thought that the flow of tears had lessened some.

Finally, his back couldn’t take any more. He released her just long enough to shift positions, placing his back against the headrest and tugging her up on his lap. Unlike the last time he’d been in bed with her, she was holding on too tight to simply surround her. This time he had her sideways on his lap, her face buried in his neck, her body still shaking.

Even after the silent flow of tears had subsided, he continued to hold her. Quietly he stroked her back, kissed her hair, and just held her. By the time she raised her head and wiped her face, his shirt was soaked and his legs were numb. She wasn’t a small woman, and she wasn’t light. Lee couldn’t find it in himself to mind.

Unfortunately, as soon as she pulled away, she did her best to shut him out. He hadn’t expected it, because previously she’d been pretty open with him. But as she wiped her face and slid off his legs, she stood and moved away from the bed as quickly as her legs could carry her. He didn’t bother to ask her if she was okay; the answer to that was obvious, and pushing her might close her off completely. She wasn’t used to being out of control, of her life or her emotions, and he knew she had to be upset that he’d seen her break down.

“This has to stop,” she said bitterly. “I’m bawling like a two-year-old over something that happened almost two weeks ago. It doesn’t solve anything, and it doesn’t fix anything.” The anger in her voice was more than obvious, but whether directed at herself or at him he couldn’t be sure.

“You’re allowed some time to recover,” he said gently. “I know what the nightmares are like. I know how hard it is to sleep, and to wake up cold and sure that there’s no air.”

“Yeah, right,” she muttered. “I haven’t seen you waking up from any nightmares.”

With stinging feeling coming back to his legs, he stood up and walked across the small room to face her. “That’s because I mostly don’t sleep,” he told her simply. “And when the nightmares come, I don’t wake up. Well, not right away, in any case. When I do it’s no different for me, Kara. Hell, the only times I’ve slept have been when you were in my arms. How’s that for pathetic.”

Another tear made its way down her face. “So we’re dependent on each other,” she said with a quiet sniffle. “That’ can’t be good.”

He had to smile, stepping closer to her. He frowned when she backed away. “There are worse things,” he reminded her. “At least we understand each other. I know what that damned shuttle felt like, and I know how hard it was to breathe before we passed out. I know how cold I was, and how badly we were shaking. I know, Kara. That’s not a bad thing; it’s something that… I don’t know, let’s us know we’re not crazy.”

“I don’t like feeling this way,” she argued. “I hate not being able to control how I feel, or what I do, or whether or not I can sleep.”

“I know.”

She shook her head. “Lee, you don’t know,” she corrected him. “I spent a lot of years with absolutely no control over anything. That’s exactly how I feel now, and I won’t live this way.”

He wanted to get closer to her, but he knew she wouldn’t allow it. Not yet. “Accidents happen,” he said. “That doesn’t make you any less responsible, or any less independent. It just makes you human.”

“But the accident is over,” she said loudly; she wasn’t screaming, but she was close. “And I still can’t sleep unless you’re here. How long am I supposed to feel this way? I can’t just… move in with you. Lee, I appreciate that you’ve been… taking care of me, protecting me. But it has to stop.”

“Why?”

Kara just stared at him. “What?”

“Why does it have to stop?” he asked. “We’ve been looking out for one another since the day the war started. Why should that stop now? Kara, the only thing that’s changed is the capacity. I backed you in a Viper before, and I’ll back you in the bedroom if I have to. If you think night-demons are any easier to handle than Cylons, you’ve got a lot to learn. After Zak…” He took a deep breath, then continued. “After Zak died, I couldn’t sleep for a month. Every time I fell asleep, my damned Viper hit the wall. Every frakking time, Kara. I finally wound up going to a doctor for medication to knock me out. That took me out of the cockpit for a month, which didn’t help my confidence or my career. And you know, I have to tell you, those damned pills didn’t work half as well as holding you. And maybe that’s stupid, but have you ever stopped to consider that I’m not just doing it for you? Has it occurred to you that I’m getting as much as I’m giving?”

Kara crossed her arms over her chest protectively, another tear slipping down one cheek. “I don’t want to be that attached to you,” she said, but at least her voice sounded reasonable rather than bordering on hysteria the way it had before. “I need to be able to sleep in my own bed, and I’ve got to be able to get myself together on my own. You can’t always be here for me, Lee. What if you’d been on patrol tonight? I’d be screaming like an idiot in quarters and the few pilots that aren’t afraid of me already would be terrified.”

“I think you’re underestimating how many people understand,” he said gently. “Everyone has nightmares.”

She sucked in another breath and let it out slowly. “You’ve got an answer for everything,” she said bitterly, but her arms were down and the tears had stopped.

“Yeah, well I learned that from you,” he fired back.

She leaned her head back against the wall. “I hate this,” she told him.

“I know.”

She brushed her hands over her face again, scrubbing at the salty streaks on her cheeks. “You tell anyone about this and you won’t wake up,” she added.

He smiled at that. “I wouldn’t even think about it,” he told her. He took a tentative step towards her, and was pleased when at least she didn’t tense up. She certainly didn’t have any room to move away. Rather than putting his arms around her, he simply offered her his hand. She looked at it for a moment, and then took it, stepping into his embrace and holding tight. Lee gave a sigh of relief as he held her; it wouldn’t have surprised him if she’d let her pride drive a wedge in between them. The same strength that he both admired and enjoyed could also be a royal pain in the ass when directed at him. “You need to eat,” he finally said. “I brought you some dinner. Go ahead and eat, and then you can get a shower. I’ll go raid your locker for a clean uniform.”

“Thanks,” she said softly, but her grip didn’t ease. He didn’t push her. After several moments more, she let go of him and gave him a tremulous smile. “Did you find real food?”

“I have connections,” he told her with a wink.

She smiled, but it didn’t reach her eyes. He watched her carefully as she went to his desk, sat down, and pulled the tray to her. He knew very well that if he stayed, he would just watch her eat, make her nervous, and probably annoy her again. As it was, he knew their time was limited. Kara was coming back, and when she was strong she didn’t need him anymore. As he slipped through the door to check her locker, he wondered whether she would bother to stay close to him because she wanted to when she no longer did it because she needed to.

Chapter 17

Kara slowed from a jog to a walk, using one arm to wipe the sweat out of her eyes. Two weeks without exercise had taken its toll on her running time, but it felt good to do something besides eat, sleep, and sit. She had another week of light duty before she could take her flight physical and get back into the cockpit, and she knew that the running would go a long ways towards improving both her mental and physical health to get her through it. She needed to be in the cockpit; it had been too long, and the simulators weren’t enough to keep her sharp.

She wondered if Lee was feeling the same way. Truthfully, she wasn’t sure. Since she’d moved back to her own bunk the evening after her crying jag, she hadn’t run into him at all. He’d spent most of his free time scrubbing toilets and hauling trash to atone for his fight with Aames. At least, that’s what Sharon had told her. Kara wasn’t sure if she wished she’d seen him or not. Cold turkey seemed to be the way to go when it came to getting over her annoying dependence on him, but that didn’t make it easy.

She’d only made one real concession to the last three difficult nights. After lying awake for all of the first one, she had slipped into Lee’s room while he was out and traded pillows with him. She had no clue if he would notice – and she really didn’t care if he did – but the now-familiar scent had helped lull her to sleep, and last night she’d only awoken twice. Both times she’d been in a cold sweat, but neither one had brought her to screaming. She considered it to be progress.

“Hey, Starbuck! What do you hear?”

Kara smiled at the commander as she slowed her pace to match his. “Nothing but the rain,” she replied, awaiting his conclusion to their little by-play.

“And how do you feel?”

That caught her of guard, but she didn’t let it throw her too far. “I’m okay,” she told him. “Not quite back to normal, but I’m getting there.” She paused a moment before she gave in and asked, “Have you heard how Lee’s doing?”

He smiled at that. “He’s doing well,” Bill told her. “I saw him this morning, when he asked about you. I figured I’d better keep my eyes open and find out.”

She blushed slightly at that, but she didn’t think it was obvious with her face flushed from running. “We’ve missed each other the last couple of days,” she hedged.

“So he told me,” Bill said. “He’s worried about you.”

She shrugged and hoped it looked casual. “I’m fine. Maybe a little tired, still, but I’ll be ready to fly by next week. I’m probably ready now if you’d consider letting me…”

“Not a chance,” he told her with a raised eyebrow. “Both of you need time to recover, mentally as well as physically.”

“I’m fine,” she told him again.

“Who are you trying to convince?” he asked. “Me or yourself?”

Kara didn’t answer that, but gave him a slight glare. He was too much like his son, as tenacious as a dog with a bone. “Why is it so hard for you two to believe that I can get over this?” she asked in annoyance. “I’m a hell of a lot stronger than I look.”

William Adama smiled, reaching out to pat her on the arm. “It’s a family trait,” he told her gently. “We worry about the people we love.”

She wasn’t going to touch that one with a ten-foot pole. Yes, she loved Lee, and she was sure it was two-way, but that wasn’t something she wanted to go into with his father. “I worry about him, too,” she admitted, the only part of the truth she would allow herself to verbalize.

“Tell him that,” Adama requested.

Something in his voice caught her attention and she looked sideways at her commander to see him looking at her intently. “Pardon?”

“Tell him,” he repeated. “He has it in his head that you want him as far away as possible, and somehow I don’t think that’s the case. I know you want to do this on your own, but I’ve learned something in the last few years. Take it from an old man, life is a hell of a lot easier when you spend it with a friend.”

She couldn’t argue with that statement, so she chose to ignore it. “If you’ve got time, would you like to meet up for dinner?” she asked in an attempt to change the subject.

“Actually,” he said, and she could have sworn he was blushing. “I… um… I have a date.”

Her eyes widened and she looked at him pointedly. “For real?”

He laughed gently. “Relax, it’s just coffee,” he told her. “But who knows.”

“Can I ask who?” she said with genuine curiosity. She cared a lot about this man, and she did want to make sure that whoever he was with was worthy of him.

“No,” he told her simply. “At least, not yet.”

Kara didn’t know what to say to that. Truthfully, she was hurt. She’d thought they were closer friends than that. “I see,” she said, but she really didn’t.

“Maybe soon,” he told her. “I guess… maybe I just want to keep this without questions for a while.”

Kara gave a careless shrug. “I’m not your mother,” she told him with a wink. “You don’t have to answer to me. Lee may feel differently, but you don’t have to answer to me.”

Bill laughed and patted her on the back as he made the turn in the corridor for CIC. “Have a good day, Starbuck.”

“You too, Commander,” she called over her shoulder, heading down the corridor towards pilot’s quarters so she could shower and dress for duty.

Unfortunately, every stall in the pilots’ shower was full, with at least two people waiting in line. If she hadn’t been so out of shape, she might not have been so sweaty and itchy, but as it was she felt miserable.

Almost involuntarily, her gaze slipped in the direction of Lee’s quarters. The door was closed, so he likely wasn’t there. If the door was locked, she knew the code. She was also fairly sure he wouldn’t mind if she slipped in and got clean. The very thought made her feel guilty, because she’d been deliberately avoiding him for the last couple of days. She’d been afraid that if she ran into him, she might weaken. She was damned tired of feeling weak.

But she was also tired of sweat and grit. The line she was in hadn’t moved, and a few other people had been added to the other lines. She had work to get done, and time was getting tight. If she wanted to get breakfast, she knew she’d have to speed things up.

Finally she realized that there really wasn’t a decision. She tucked her clothes under one arm and walked to Lee’s door. As a courtesy she knocked first, but she didn’t really expect an answer. When she got what she expected, she punched in the code for his lock and eased through the door.

“Lee?” she called out. Nothing. She crossed the room to knock on the door to the head. “Lee, are you in there?” Again, no response. She pushed the hatch slowly open – just in case – and then entered so that she could get cleaned up.

Ten minutes later, Kara was warm and clean and smelling a hell of a lot better. She considered dressing in the confined space of the head, and decided that she’d have a better chance of getting dressed without hurting herself if she went out into the main room; there was barely enough room to turn around where she was. She wrapped Lee’s towel around her body, grabbed her dry clothes from the tiny sink, and moved out into the room. Once she’d tossed her clothes on his bed, she dropped the towel and pulled on her underwear. Before she could find her bra in the tangle of clothes, she heard the door behind her open and she scrambled for her clothes – the towel – anything.

“Nice,” Lee said simply, and she could hear the smile in his voice.

“Cute,” she muttered, finally getting her hands on her shirt and holding it up in front of her chest while she spun to face him.

“Hey, it’s my room,” he told her with a grin, closing the door behind him. “So, by default, I get to see what goes on in here. Objections?”

“Turn around, Lee,” she said in a growl.

“Not if you paid me,” he countered with a wink. “The view’s too good.”

Fine, she thought. If he was going to try to make her uncomfortable, then two of them could play at this game. “Last warning,” she told him.

He crossed his arms and leaned back against the door, but he didn’t turn around.

She had two options. The first – most sensible – was to grab her clothes and head for the restroom. Her second – much more fun – was to beat him at his own game. She’d never been one to play it safe. With no more thought than that, she dropped the shirt and reached for her bra. She pulled the running garment over her head, worked her arms through it, and adjusted the material beneath her breasts before looking up to see what Lee had done. She half expected him to have turned around after all; he had that damned Adama sense of decency. But this time, being male had overridden being an Adama, and he was still in the same position, eyes wide open, and smile completely gone. The look in his eyes was intent. “Like the show?” she asked. She had been going for sarcastic, but the words came out just a little forced, and her mouth was unusually dry.

Lee moved slowly, taking the few steps towards her before reaching out to run a finger from her temple to her cheek. She thought of moving back, getting out of range, but her feet seemed to be stuck in place. She didn’t move a muscle as Lee’s hands brushed down her arms, back up to her neck, and then his arms went around her.

She had thought she was ready for his kiss. She was wrong. When his lips touched hers, the jolt made her jump, and she didn’t even have the presence of mind to put her arms around him. She just stood there, letting him kiss her, feeling his hands on her bare back, and enjoying it immensely. When he pulled away so that they could both catch a breath, she caught another look at his eyes. The deep blue was clearer than she’d ever seen it, and he looked far more serious than she’d seen in a long time. All she wanted to do was come up with a snappy comeback – a sarcastic remark – but she didn’t have one. All she had was a rapidly beating heart and a fluttering sensation in her stomach.

“I’d better let you get dressed,” he said in a hoarse voice. Then he was moving away.

Kara knew she should let him go, but what she should do and what she could do were a long ways from the same. As he stepped back, she moved forward, wrapping her arms around him and leaning up for another kiss. Lee wasn’t complaining. In fact, the sigh he gave as she did so sounded a whole lot like relief. She knew the feeling.

Kara didn’t rush the kiss. They played with one another, tongues tangling and teeth nipping, occasionally pressing closer for something more intense. His hands didn’t leave her back, and hers didn’t leave his, but she wanted them to on both counts. The feel of his hands on her skin was amazing. By the time Lee lifted his head from hers, they were both breathless, both shaking, and neither seemed to have a clue what to do about it.

“I’m gonna be late for work,” she finally said, but her voice didn’t sound like her own.

He nodded dumbly, reaching up with one hand to run a finger along her cheek, down her jaw, settling carefully around her neck. “I know,” he said softly. “I make the schedules.”

She smiled at that, feeling a lot more shy than she thought she should with a good friend, especially given how close they had been in the previous couple of weeks. But what they had shared this time hadn’t been comfort, or desperation, or even friendship. It had been… more. “The showers were full,” she told him by way of explanation.

“I figured.”

“I thought I’d be out before you got here,” she added.

“It’s okay.”

“No, it’s not,” she corrected. “I should have asked. I shouldn’t have just come in. Or at least I should have checked the schedule to see…”

He cut her off with a kiss as deep as the last, one hand holding her head in place while the other trailed over the naked skin between bra and underwear on her right side until he was quite finished, and she was once again out of breath. “You don’t need to explain,” he told her simply, resting his forehead against hers.

“I just didn’t want you to think I was… I don’t know, leading you on or something.”

Lee smiled at that. “You’ve done everything but jump ship to stay clear of me,” he reminded her. “I didn’t figure you were making an offer. I was just going to give you a hard time, but then you…”

“Yeah,” she agreed, giving a slight blush as she spoke. “Guess that wasn’t my brightest move today.”

“I don’t know,” he argued. “I really didn’t mind it.”

“Gee thanks,” she muttered, finally moving away to grab her shirts. She pulled on one, and then the other, before reaching for her pants. Lee just stood there watching with an odd look on his face. “What?” she asked.

“Just… watching.”

She shook her head. “Come off it,” she said in slight annoyance. “If you want a show, there’s about a dozen girls out there with a lot more to look at and a much more agreeable disposition,” she remarked. “Anything I’ve got they have more of and it’s better distributed. Trust me.”

Lee just grinned. “You really believe that, don’t you?”

She gave a shrug as she sat on the edge of his bed and pulled on her pants. “I’m a realist,” she told him.

“You’re a cynic,” he corrected. “But that’s okay. I’ll consider it a challenge.”

She raised her eyebrows in a silent question. What the hell was he talking about?

“You know,” he told her. “I’ve figured something out in the last few days. A lot of things, actually. To begin with, I miss you. It was nice having a friend around at three in the morning when the room closes in. Another thing… you’re warm. I didn’t know how cold that damned bed was until you weren’t in it. It surprised the hell out of me.”

“Lee, this isn’t…” she began.

“Nope,” he interrupted, placing one palm against her cheek with a thumb covering her lips. “My turn; let me finish. The days are a lot longer when I don’t have someone to look forward to talking to about them. And maybe I’m out of line, but I think you care about me too, and if the world’s gonna fall apart around us, we don’t have the luxury of thinking that life is going to last forever. So I guess if I’m going to have you in my life, I should just come out and say it because hinting around isn’t getting it done.”

Kara just stood there, slowly absorbing what he’d said, but even more so the way in which he’d said it. When he still hadn’t moved his hand a few moments later, she carefully bit his thumb. She didn’t realize her mistake until she’d done it. Lee’s eyes closed in a moment of consideration, and then his arms were around her again. While the sensations on her body were less acute through a layer of clothes, his kiss was just as potent. Her eyes closed, her mind shut down, and for just that short time she forgot that she was a pilot and he was her boss and that they were just friends.

When he pulled back that time he was clearly reluctant, ending the kiss with gentle pecks and nibbles, another light kiss, and then a moment of just looking at her. “You’ve got to get to work,” he told her, but he didn’t sound like he meant it.

Her mind went over the roster placement. She had the sims today – nine young pilots trying to learn to control a shuttle without killing anyone. It wasn’t something she could ignore, or go into with her mind clouded. “I’m off at twenty-two hundred,” she thought aloud.

He smiled at her. “You know where to find me,” he said softly, and kissed her once more, gently, carefully.

“Mmm, hmm,” she agreed, letting herself return the kiss.

Lee just shook his head. “Go,” he finally said. “While I’ll still let you. I don’t want us both in hack because we aren’t paying attention to time.”

She had to smile. “Mister By-the-Book… first fighting, now making out on shift. Maybe the world is ending.”

“You little brat,” he said, moving to smack her, but she was too quick. She grabbed her socks from the bed and headed for the door.

“Oh, and check with your dad,” she called as she was opening the door. “He said he has a date tonight, and I can’t get any details. Maybe you’ll have better luck.”

Lee looked at her dubiously. “Right.”

Kara laughed all the way to her locker.

William Adama sat nervously in his room while he waited for his guests. The last month had set new records for him in the way of emotional confusion, but he was finally ready to settle down and make some kind of sense of it. Unfortunately, he didn’t feel that he could do it alone. There were too many other people involved in the situation to make it his solitary choice, and that was what had him on edge.

Okay, so he had a girlfriend, for lack of a better word. It was a stupid word, really. He was well over sixty years old, and she was over fifty, so the whole “girlfriend”, “boyfriend” terminology seemed grossly inadequate. It also wasn’t a traditional relationship, he supposed. At least not like the ones he’d had when he was younger. He barely remembered dating before Iilya, but he was fairly sure that the physical aspect of it had been predominant. Now he found the intellectual stimulation to be far more valuable. It wasn’t that she was unattractive – far from it, actually – but his priority was her mind rather than her body.

Hell, he didn’t even really remember. He hadn’t dated in so damned long that all of it was purely unclear. He wasn’t even sure if what he was doing could rightly be called dating. He had dinner with her occasionally, they met in his room to talk several times a week, and they both enjoyed a good game of cards or watching old vids. Once or twice they’d fallen asleep side-by-side, and he did enjoy kissing her, but he wasn’t entire comfortable going further. He was old fashioned that way.

She didn’t seem to think of him as an old man, and his appearance hadn’t stopped her from kissing him on more occasions than he could count. William remembered having a discussion with Saul months earlier about infatuation and what it felt like, and if Adama was honest, this was it. He couldn’t find it in him to be sorry.

But that was the beginning – not the end – of the dilemma. First there was the age issue, which was only about ten years, but appeared to be substantially more. She was a beautiful woman, and there were days he had to remind himself that she wasn’t a girl. Next, she was enlisted. Granted, he’d essentially eliminated the division between officers and enlisted where his crew was concerned – they couldn’t survive if limits were placed on who they could or couldn’t be attracted to – but allowing his crew to fraternize and doing so himself were different matters. The only redeeming factor in that area was that she fell under medical and he belonged to command, which were two essentially independent entities. Finally, there was his son. While he and Iilya had been divorced for two years before her death, or nearly that, he still didn’t know how Lee would react to his being with another woman. Lee was fiercely loyal, and yet he’d supported his mother’s engagement. William didn’t know if that was because Lee liked the man, or had hated his father at the time. Either way, he couldn’t predict his son’s feelings about this. Last, there was the woman concerned. Cassie was… amazing. She was honest to a fault, entertaining, lovely, sexy, and she’d had more than one run-in with both Lee and Kara, whom William considered almost to be a daughter. He didn’t want Cassie to alienate his family any more than he wanted them to alienate her.

A knock at his door startled him from staring at the covered dishes on his table and moved his attention to the closed hatch. “Come,” he called out, and was dismayed to find that his throat was so dry that he was hoarse. Lords he hated being nervous.

“Hey,” Kara called as she stepped through the hatch. Lee was close behind her. The two were rarely seen apart lately outside of duty, but as yet his spies hadn’t reported anything beyond a strong friendship. There had been no PDA observed between them, no careless comments, and no inappropriate behavior. He didn’t entirely believe the reports, but he didn’t have anything concrete to dispute them with. Kara sure as hell wasn’t talking, and his son was the original clam.

“Come in,” he said, trying again. His throat didn’t feel any better. He grabbed a glass of water, took a swallow, and wondered when the world had shifted on him. Ten years before, he could remember his boys bringing home their girlfriends for inspection, their nervous expressions, the humor he’d found in the situation. Now the generations appeared to be reversed, and he wasn’t enjoying the turmoil.

“We’re here,” Lee said as he pulled out a chair for Kara. Hmmm… that was interesting. William hadn’t seen that before. Then Lee took a seat and for a moment things seemed almost normal.

“Sorry we’re late,” Kara told him. “Ran into some fuel issues on patrol. Can’t seem to teach the kids to moderate their speed. They’re either jumping ahead or falling behind, and all the switching back and forth uses up more fuel than it should.”

“Suggestions?” he asked, automatically moving into “commander mode” as Cassie called it. For every problem, he believed there was a solution. His job was to find a way to find it. He couldn’t solve all the problems on the battlestar, but he tried to see too it that each problem was addressed by someone qualified.

“Restricters, maybe,” Kara said, looking to Lee for confirmation. He nodded, and she went on. “I’ll talk to Tyrol about it, if you think it’s okay. It’ll slow them down some, but it’ll also level out their acceleration. We can always have them shut down in the event of an attack.”

Lee nodded. “But only in certain Vipers,” he said, moving his gaze back to his father. “I know I have some veterans who would be purely pissed off if they had to be held back that way. It’s not necessary, and it’s frankly insulting.”

“Not to mention boring,” Kara agreed with a wink. “But other than that, things are pretty level, I suppose. The new shuttle pilots are settling in nicely, and we have a few more slated to start training next month. I think we’ll have quarters filled out well by then.”

Willliam Adama smiled. It was good news. They had been fighting with the lack of pilots since the war began. He was just about to inquire about other areas of the flight deck when a tentative knock was heard. William took a deep breath and faced his son. “Well, I guess this is it,” he muttered.

“We finally get to meet the mystery lady,” Kara said with a grin. William shook his head. Kara had been the first to know he was dating, and she hadn’t let him live it down for a moment. He knew it was because she worried – he was in a relatively high-profile job within the fleet, and that might be seen as attractive to some women. It was normal to suspect a woman’s motives.

But Cassie was different. He hadn’t hidden her because he doubted her motives, but rather because he wanted to keep something for himself. He had very little that was his own on this ship – very little that was not work or family related – and Cass was someone he could turn to when either of those two areas became too much. It was selfish, but he hadn’t wanted the crossover. The only real objectivity in his life seemed to come from this one woman.

He gave Kara a mild glare, but they all knew what this dinner was about. He’d told Lee when he’d invited him, as he’d told Cassie. William was sure that Lee had passed the information onto Kara, and if he hadn’t been her comment would have told him. Trying not to be nervous – Lords he hated this – he walked to the door and opened it. Cassie was there, dressed in scrubs rather than her uniform, and looking positively exhausted. Apparently, his scheduling hadn’t been all that he’d hoped. “Hi,” she said in a faded voice. “Did I miss it?”

“We haven’t started,” he assured her as he took her hand to escort her into the room. She gripped hard, and he realized that she must be almost as nervous about this as he was. When he’d asked her for this – to have dinner with him and meet his family – he had known what he was implying. She had as well, and in her typical fashion she had asked him point blank what his intentions were. That discussion had led to a kiss of surprising intensity given his age – at least surprising to him – and a joke about Cassie’s ability to perform CPR. “Lee, Kara, I’m sure you know Cassiopiea, from Life Station. Cassie, my son Lee, and a dear friend of the family, Kara Thrace.”

“We’ve met,” Lee said with a smile, standing up to take her hand and shake it gently. “In fact, you’ve poked more than one hole in me lately.”

She smiled at that. “You only hurt the ones you love,” she told him with a wink, reverting to her natural joking manner despite her obvious nerves. “As long as you stay out of life-threatening situations and barroom brawls, I promise not to come after you with any more needles.”

Lee laughed, but Kara gave a snort. “Yeah, right,” she said. “That’s why you find the biggest needle you can when I come in for my annual physicals,” she accused.

“Guilty as charged,” Cassie replied, taking Kara’s hand as well. “Consider it my reward for sending me more business than any other single pilot on the Galactica.”

Kara laughed at that. “Everyone has to have a skill.”

Cassie giggled in a surprisingly girlish manner, and Kara joined in. William and Lee looked at one another, each stunned at the sound, and then turned back to watch the women.

“It’s nice to see you outside of Life Station,” Kara finally said. “So, you’re the one who’s been monopolizing Bill’s time.” The statement sounded accusatory, even to William, but he decided not to comment. If Cassie was going to manage, she needed to hold her own from the start.

“I guess I am,” she said, glancing over at him for encouragement. He gave her a smile and continued. “He’s just about the best pyramid player I’ve run up against. Although, I hear that you normally beat the daylights out of him.”

“She beats everyone,” Lee threw in. “We’ve stopped taking it personally.”

“Yeah right,” Kara argued. “You’ve stopped playing; that’s what you’ve done. I can’t get anyone in a game.”

“Maybe after dinner we can all play,” Cassie offered hopefully. Kara gave her a nearly sadistic grin, and both Lee and William moaned. “What?” she asked innocently.

“Don’t let them get to you,” Kara advised. “They hate to lose.” Then she turned her attention to Bill. “So, what have you found to feed us?” she asked, that same strain of hope in her voice that had been there when she’d asked about playing cards.

The meal went surprisingly well, Bill thought later. Lee and Cassie had gotten along well, and even Kara had seemed surprisingly agreeable. She did weasel them into a couple of games of cards, predictably winning but remaining amicable as she did so. He and Lee had rolled their eyes, and Cassie had taken it in good humor. In all, he couldn’t have hoped that it would go better. He had even left Cassie and Kara alone for a few moments while he and Lee talked about some business related to CIC, and the two women had been talking pleasantly when the men had returned. William couldn’t say that he wasn’t surprised, but he was very pleased. By the time Lee and Kara had gone back to quarters, Cassie had been nodding off, Lee hadn’t looked much better, and even Kara had been rather subdued. For his part, William felt very good, although he thought a great deal of his energy might be coming from unabashed relief.

“They’re nice,” Cassie said as he handed her a cup of coffee. She was curled up on the couch with her feet beneath her, shoes on the floor and looking about sixteen years old. Okay, so sometimes she still made him feel a little old. “I like them a lot better outside of Life Station,” she remarked.

William laughed at that. “Most people aren’t at their best there,” he reminded her. “Pain has a way of bringing out the worst in people.”

“Pain and annual exams,” Cassie agreed. “Still, I felt like Kara had me under a microscope. She worries more about you than Lee does.”

“She has a soft heart,” he said gently. “Most people don’t see it, but it’s there. Heaven help anyone who hurts someone who she cares about.”

“Tell me about it,” Cassie said with a grin and another sip of coffee. “Although she only threatened me once. I guess that’s a good sign.”

“Threatened you?”

Cassie shrugged. “Something along the lines of my life not being worth much if I broke your heart. Frankly, I can’t blame her. Although…”

Bill wasn’t sure whether to be alarmed or amused. “Although…” he prompted.

Cassie looked at him seriously. “I almost got the feeling… I mean…” She shook her head. “I though for a minute I had some serious competition. She really thinks that you walk on water, and she’s awfully pretty. And the way you talk about her…”

Bill had sat down next to her, but now he put his coffee down and moved close enough to put an arm around her shoulders. “Why is it that everyone assumes there’s something going on between us?” he asked in confusion. “I’ve never been inappropriate around her, never indicated that there’s anything going on… At first it was funny, but it’s getting downright annoying.”

Cassie snuggled into his hug, closing her eyes. “It’s just rare,” she said softly. “The two of you… hell, the three of you care so much about one another that it’s almost visible. It’s not something we see very often, and honestly it’s enough to make most of us damned jealous. It’s always easier to make accusations when someone else has something so… nice.”

“We have a lot of history,” Bill said thoughtfully, placing a small kiss at Cassie’s temple. “I’ve told you about Zak, and the mess with Lee afterwards. Kara was kind of the… glue that kept us together when we really didn’t want to be. I just wanted to get clear of the accusations, and Lee wanted to kill me, so Kara was the peacemaker. I guess going through something like that builds a bond that’s pretty strong.”

“I see.”

He gave her a gentle squeeze and a smile. “Cass, the generations around here have been… redefined, but there is a limit. She’s half my age, she’s at least half in love with my son, and I see her very much as a daughter. I think you’re place is pretty safe with me.”

“My place?” she asked, lifting her head and facing him.

“Well, you definitely got their seal of approval,” he said with a wink. “And you already had mine. I guess you’re stuck with me now.”

She looked at him very seriously. “What they think means that much to you?” she asked. There was no expression on her face, no indication of the answer she wanted, so he decided to be honest.

“I suppose it does,” he admitted. “If tonight hadn’t gone well, I would have felt the need to… change their opinions. I like having you in my life – you’re good for me – but I also value my children. I wouldn’t have kicked you out, but I definitely would have started plotting a way to get you guys together. Families aren’t meant to be divided.”

“I’m family?” she asked with raised eyebrows.

He leaned forward and kissed her. “Damned close,” he told her softly. “Does that… bother you.”

“It honors me,” she said simply. “But… what if I hadn’t liked them?”

He watched her for a long moment, and then he smiled. “Then I guess I’d have to change your mind,” he said. “I can be very convincing.”

Cassie set her coffee on the table next to his, then turned to put her arms around his neck and stretch her legs out over his. “You think you are, hmmm?”

“I can hold my own,” he said, accepting her kiss, then giving one back.

“I’ll need proof of that,” she declared. “Talk is cheap.”

“So it is,” he agreed, kissing her once more.

It was the beginning of a lovely night, William thought later. Perhaps he could adjust to the new world after all. It wasn’t easy having children flying the Vipers and his son further along in a relationship than he was, but there were far worse things. It was a new world, and the generations had been redefined, but that wasn’t necessarily a bad thing.

And as he lay in bed with Cassie next to him, gently rubbing her back as she dozed in and out, he thought that he might perhaps be able to get used to then new way of things. At the very least, it would be fun to try. As Cass had once told him, he was a human first and a commander second… thankfully, he was beginning to think in those terms himself. At the very least, he could go into the mess hall now without garnering strange looks, and he could sit with who he wanted, talk about what he liked. It was progress, he decided. Yes, there would always be rumors flying on the Galactica, but he’d learned that they didn’t need to rule him.

Now, if he could just figure out exactly what was happening between Kara and Lee, he might feel like all was right in the world. Absently he began to plot how Cassie might help him find out…

The End

(or as close as it’s gonna get)